Isekai Speedrun

Me and the boys teleported to Ice Dungeon under Winter Forest.

The dungeon was basically a deep, ancient river valley filled with a massive glacier sheets – or perhaps it would be better to describe it as a dry landlocked fjord, with multiple levels of ice caverns as its floors and ceilings.

The bottom of the dungeon where we appeared had massive ruins of some ancient civilization. There were large stone temples, wide houses, and majestic fallen statues without any markings or fine details, all smoothed and polished by water and ice. Nevertheless, you could see glimpses of something resembling South-American or Middle-American design and architecture (Maya, Aztec, Olmec, Toltec, etc.) under the half-molten, half-frozen surroundings.

The in-game lore contained hints that this place used to be above ground, but somehow ended up at the bottom of the dungeon, and then a primeval forest grew on top of it. More particularly, there was a scroll called The Heroic Winter Knights of the Magnificent Winter Kingdom in the Valkross Fortress archive and these ruins matched the setting of those stories. Wintersmith also had a dialogue block where he mentioned that ‘long ago, there were more stone spires than trees here’ as if he had seen them with his own eyes.

The current Winter Forest tribes were perhaps the regressed descendants of the citizens of that lost kingdom.

This type of ‘fallen ancient empire with magical technology’ was a common trope in fantasy series. I found it amusing to think which actual historical era these fantasy settings were based on: the Hanseatic League era was probably the closest real thing with its guilds and city-states, mercenaries guarding traveling merchant caravans, technological development right at the cusp of gunpowder weapons, ancient Roman infrastructure (made with mysteriously durable concrete) taking the place of lootable dungeons for knight-errants, and plagued, starved foreigners with mental disorders standing in as ‘demons’.

I opened my eyes and the coldness of the Ice Dungeon hit my face even though I was wearing a wool mask.

The twins looked like small animals trying to roll themselves into a ball. T-Sub was surprised by the vapor coming out of his mouth on every breath and immediately buttoned the heavy winter coat he had kept open until now.

“Now we’re ganbaru-ing. Everyone okay? Any fingers or limbs missing?”
”We are complete.” (Ivorythief)
“I am fine, master. Did the trick with flagstaff work?” (T-Sub)

I turned the flagstaff in vertical position and immediately felt that it was lighter than before. One third of the three-meter flagstaff was gone. The edge of the teleportation circle had cut the part I kept outside the circle cleanly off.

“Nope. That’s a negative.”

The burning blue V-flag wasn’t there, but some black ash fell to the snow. The staff itself had some black blotches, but it wasn’t damaged by the fire.

Another confirmed no-glitch. Bummer. Bad game design.

But I wonder what would happen if I place Sorry Man halfway in the circle… No, let’s not think about that. I can already hear Rain cocking her revolvers.

Hopefully Crys collects one-third of the flagstaff that was left behind. I’d like to examine both sides of the cut.

“Master, the destination circle has the same arrangement as the origin circle, but it’s mirrored.” (T-Sub)
“Yep, it works like encryption and decryption. Lock and key must match, blade grooves are the opposites sheath grooves.”

The teleportation circle had courteously exploded and expectorated all the snow and ice away from top of it upon our arrival. We were standing in a neat, clean circle that looked like a small meteor crater, or like a hot branding made with a giant iron.

Umu. Experiencing actual teleportation felt pretty ridiculous. What is the logic of all these teleportation variants in Mu-Ur? How to categorize them? How to exploit them?

First were the portal doors between roomworlds: lossless transfer of original, two-way, always online, instant, same-level world to same-level world(?), origin door and destination door do not need to match.

Second, teleportation circles: lossless transfer of original, one-way, may be triggered multiple times, instant(?), same-level world to same-level world(?), origin circle and destination circle must match.

Third, my isekai glitch: lossy copy or lossy transfer, one-way, triggers once and never again(?), instant(?), higher-level world to lower-level world(?), origin and destination cannot match(?).

Fourth, the portal paintings at Raft Island: lossy copy or lossy transfer(?), two-way(?), instant(?), always online or may be triggered multiple times(?), any-level world to any-level world(?), origin and destination cannot match(?).

Fifth, Kraj’s, Bodhi’s and Kimono’s jumpcut movement skills: lossless transfer, two-way, triggered and powered by stamina, frame-to-frame, no doors or circles or paintings or portals needed, same world only (cannot Flash Step or Adrenaline Time through a portal door experimentally confirmed).

And sixth, Kurdt’s dream-beam thingies: lossy data-only, any-way, any-level world to any-level world, origin and destination whatever, time and space do not matter(?).

...Damn it, Mu-Ur world, make it make sense!

“Let’s move.”

I re-activated my light card and used it as a searchlight in the dim ice cavern.

Yes, the bottom level of the Ice Dungeon looked like an abandoned ancient city created with Max Ernst’s frottage techniques. There were some interesting Lovecraftian mythos artifacts and statues in the buildings that looked like they had melted before freezing, but we didn’t come here explore ruins.

“There’s very few dungeon lights down here, but since sun is still up, there’s enough light coming down through the ice layers and crevices. We’ll head upward and set our base camp in the first floor, and sleep and eat breakfast there before heading out to the forest in the morning. Follow me, brave explorers, and stay alert. There’s snowspiders around.”

The creatures called White Snowspiders were the main living enemies in the Ice Dungeon. They usually made sneak attacks from above, took a small bite of you before retreating, and then just waited outside melee range until the paralyzing poison took effect, or you bled to death. They hunted in shadows and didn’t like fire or bright lights, so keeping the Strangers light card on was enough to make them think twice.

For the twins, the snowspiders creeping in the shadows were just weak mobs, so I wasn’t worried. The big spiders in their home dungeon at Fireland were far sneakier and far more poisonous in comparison. Snowspiders were worth wasting ammo, a good knife was enough.

While T-Sub followed me silently in the ice tunnels through various changing shades of light and shadow, Reavertooth and Ivorythief zigzagged through the ruins with their special flashy skills like anime ninjas. They seemed to enjoy moving freely in a non-trapped environment after the strict restrictions I placed on them in the Deep Basement. We occasionally heard some panicked, hissing echos from the darkness – the canonical sounds of a dying snowspider.

T-Sub could have also killed a few spiders at his leisure, but he was busy adjusting to the temperature and protecting me.

“Don’t worry, Big-T, this is as cold as it gets. It’s actually warmer when we go up. We can make a small campfire in the first floor.”
“Really? I thought wind would make the air colder in the forest. Is that not true?” (T-Sub)
“Well, after the Frozen Pyramid room and this bottom level, the surface temperature of Winter Forest feels like a chilly summertime in comparison. I’d say it’s like minus twenty Celsius down here and maybe minus five to ten Celsius on the surface.“
“Water freezes at zero and bubbles at hundred.” (T-Sub)
“Well done remembering that rule of thumb, T.”

When we ascended through smooth and slippery steps to the second floor, the twins were already waiting us at the top of the steps, breathing warm air in their triple-gloves.

Poor dudes. It’s not like cold weather is their weakness or anything, but it must feel unpleasant.

The icy tunnels turned into wide glacier slices that had been high halls of some large structure in the past. An ancient gate made of white stone stood half-open, its fringes carved full of pictograms as mysterious as Olmec script. It would’ve been great if someone had cracked this pictogram code in the game, but I guess there wasn’t a single linguist who would spend time on fictional language that looked like random AI generated garnish.

When we reached the first floor and the secret surface entrance into the Ice Dungeon, we saw a snowstorm raging in the Winter Forest. The cold wind kept blowing and piling snow at the tunnel entrance.

“Small change of plans. Let’s return to the second floor and set up camp there instead.”

We survived a no-hit run through Deep Basement. Hopefully our good luck continues in this second silly place.

---

I had already closed my eyes in my improvised sleeping bag, but then T-Sub suddenly started a late night discussion about the Winter Forest tribes with the twins. He repeated some erroneous info from unreliable in-world sources.

Someone is wrong on the internet. I obviously had to get up and explain the correct details.

“T-Sub, don’t put misinformation into people’s heads. The Sultanate sources about Winter Forest are wrong. First of all… Actually, let’s go back to the very basics: there are two big native tribes in the Winter Forest, Source Tribe and Staff Tribe. Source Tribe rules over the frozen lake and its high islands. They worship the magical Sparkling Source that appears semi-randomly during full moons above an ancient stone altar on their main island. For them, Sparkling Source is basically a god and a wireless power hotspot that charges their Strangers’ vehicles. The vehicles were called Aerosani in the flavor text, although they look more like some kind of EV concept snowmobiles without any visible propellers, so it’s most likely a naming error. By the way, if you pressed me to find something positive to say about Strangers, I’d say that they didn’t use fossil fuels. They ruined the continents by mining core crystals, but at least they didn’t ruin oceans with plastic trash.”
“Thank you for correcting me, master.” (T-Sub)
“No problem. The other big tribe, Staff Tribe, lives mainly on the southeast side of the forest, in the area protected by Stick Witch. The tribes are at constant war because they each want what the other possesses. Staff Tribe wants the Source that makes snowmobiles go and Source Tribe wants the Sparkling Staff that can be used to control the opening and closing of the Source, which would allow using at any time instead of depending on semi-random monthly surges.”
“Hm, hm.” (T-Sub)

T-Sub kept nodding and writing his notebook while keeping his fingers warm next to the small campfire.

“Now, the actual detail you got wrong: if the Stick Witch is so powerful, why doesn’t she attack the high islands directly? The answer is simple: she cannot enter the frozen lake area. Not only would her steps melt the ice underneath, but it’s also because as long as there’s flowing water under her, she cannot move freely. She’s like a classic vampire in that sense.”
“She cannot freely move on flowing water?” (T-Sub)
“Yep. That’s a metamagical rule for many apparitions. They can’t move to different areas over map borders like rivers, lakes, landwalls, and so on. Remember, they take things literally: if they have an ancient map with a border, they think that border exists in reality. Anyway, like I said, the Staff Tribe worships Stick Witch as their goddess because she has a passive temperature-altering ability to melt snow and make berries and flowers grow in the middle of eternal winter, providing food and warmth for his followers. The temperature magic also gives her the ability to control fire and wind in various ways. In turn, Staff Tribe’s men serve her like summoned soldiers and they wage a continuous guerrilla war against the Source Tribe. Practically all male children of both tribes are raised to become warriors and haters – and not just against the other local gang but all outsiders.”

The twins listened attentively despite the fact that I already explained Stick Witch’s abilities to them previously. I wonder how much they had understood and misunderstood.

“Thank you again, master.” (T-Sub)
“You can tell me if I use concepts and words that go over your head.”
“Yes, master.” (T-Sub)
“Bodhi and Kraj, any questions? Anything bothering your mind?”
“No. Sleep now.” (Reavertooth)
“Brother sleep to wake up, to hunt.” (Ivorythief)

That’s it? Am I boring you with my unsurpassed expertise and knowledge? Well, they don’t need to remember trivial background lore, that’s my job as the party shaman. They can concentrate on punching baddies.

“Alright, sleepy time. I have a feeling it’s going to be a marathon run tomorrow.”

The twins kept guard in turns. Reavertooth slept first. This is how they lived and survived in the Fireland dungeon.

---

Good morning, Winter Forest.

When we climbed back to the first floor and climbed over the fresh snowdrift that had accumulated on the narrow entrance tunnel between high ice walls, the sun was just rising over the forest. The pale spotlight through white clouds seemed like it was pushing down thick fog made of dancing ice crystals.

Ah, the tall oaks, the majestic pines, the spruces. The giant redwood, the larch – I’m not a lumberjack and I’m not okay –

The forest was motionless and quiet like a painting. The scene from the entrance reminded me of Caspar David Friedrich’s Monastery Graveyard in the Snow, but with more snow and less graves.

“Gentlemen, equip your snowshoes.”

After checking that my compass card worked correctly, we left the Ice Dungeon behind.

This central sub-area of Winter Forest was relatively safe, which is why teleporting here saved so much time and effort. Southeast from our location was the Staff Tribe territory full of traps; northeast was the area of strange apparitions; north and northwest was the lake area of Source Tribe; and west-southwest was the wilderness area of carnivores.

Figuratively speaking, we had appeared in the calm center of a hurricane.

Compass card in hand, I guided the party southeast toward Staff Tribe territory.

When we reached the first peak of a snow-crowned hill, I turned to look back. Behind the Ice Dungeon’s secret entrance, you could see majestic pyramid-shaped peaks of solid ice, and behind those peaks, the wide shores of the icy lake as big as inland sea.

It was simply called Frozen Lake on the game’s overworld map. The fresh windswept snow on the offing looked like waves of salt, but the shores of high islands were covered by cracked and terraced ice sheets layered on top of each other. This reminded me of Friedrich’s painting The Sea of Ice; like island castles made of giant shards of broken glass.

That’s right, peeps – the sublime scenery of Winter Forest always took me back to the days of studying German Romanticism.

Far away, on the opposite side of the lake (before the snow-capped mountain range that suggested the northernmost edge of the game world) there was a silly sub-area known as Forest of Unmind. That was the place where the creepy little girl ghost appeared and beckoned you to follow her in the forest. If you followed her too deep, you lost your way, then lost your memories and finally lost your mind and sense of self. In game terms, you started losing your stats and indicators one by one until you finally lost the control of your character – and that’s when the girl levitated near you, her deadpan face filling your POV... and you respawned back to the lakeside.

“You definitely don’t want to go to the lake over there. That’s where the bizarre things start to appear.”
“What kind of things?” (T-Sub)

The unsettling whispers, the twisted geometries; the fairy bears, the mirrors of red fog; the deformed deviant half-ghosts... Those are the kind of horror scenes that stay in your mind even after logging out of the game.

I don’t care to see the real life inspirations of those game assets. Horror is the wrong genre tag for me.

“I’ll tell you later, T. Let’s concentrate on enjoying the nice winter scenery this way instead.”

---

The stillness of the morning turned into a howling wind of the evening. There was a faint scent of burning wood in the air, probably from the campfires of Staff Tribe.

After the twins killed a few curious wolves (bookcase-sized ones), we climbed on top of another snowy hill to take a look around.

“If there were less snow and fog in the air, we could see the Source Tribe’s main island from here. Look straight north, maybe you can make out the silhouettes of their guard tower trees.”
“Yes, master.” (T-Sub)
“Kraj, Bodhi, you guys still alright? If you want to take a break, just say so.”

The twins seemed restless and were shivering from the cold. Or maybe they were just doing fast consecutive sidesteps to keep themselves warm. They ticked and twitched all the time anyway.

“Stick Witch southeast?” (Reavertooth)
“Eh, yes and no. As I said, Stick Witch usually appears somewhere between the lake and their sub-area. It’s better to flank from the southeast side if we want to find Thiefmaster. Thiefmaster came into the forest from that way, so–”
“This way, east. We hunt witch.” (Reavertooth)
“No, guys, don’t try to change the mission midway, that’s a rookie mistake. You need to follow in-game leader. We didn’t come here to hunt the witch. Witch is not important now, we hunt Thiefmaster now. Hunt witch later, okay?”
“We hunt witch now.” (Ivorythief)
“There’s a cave nearby, let’s make a small fire and warm up–”
“Hunt witch now!” (Ivorythief)

Crap. They suddenly got all serious about it.

T-Sub went into full bodyguard mode and moved between me and the twins.

I miscalculated. They probably intended to do this from the start. They have a personal grudge against Stick Witch from their previous encounter. They’ve never met Thiefmaster in this timeline, they don’t care about him. If I say no to them now, they will probably leave us and continue to hunt Stick Witch alone. There’s no point arguing with the twins when it comes to hunting.

Spoiled, uncompromising brats. Stupid characters being stupid.

Avoiding Stick Witch and taking down bosses one at a time would be the safest strat, Sometimes the game kicks you in the crotch and you just have to deal with it.

You either roll with the sidekick RNG or reset – and there’s no reset here.

“Okay, fine. Stand down, T-Sub. We’ll go after Stick Witch first. Maybe it’s better because we know her regular haunts. Saves us from doing another trip.”

I kicked off snow from the top of a fallen tree and placed my boot on the trunk like a rock star about to play a guitar solo.

“Listen up, I’m going reveal something I didn’t tell you before.”

The twins squatted down like two Slavic delinquents waiting a sip of vodka.

Am I doting on my favorite characters too much? Is it my fault that these kids are acting spoiled?

“Stick Witch’s tracks are easier to find than I said previously. You probably saw it yourself the first time you were here, right? The longer she stays in place, the larger the circle of green. And you know where she most often stands? At the shore of the lake, observing the high islands. She haunts the borders of her boss area. So we can just check the snow circles there first, and if we can’t find any, we’ll continue east toward the tribe sub-area, traveling between the frozen river and landwalls to keep the encounter rate high; we’ll either find her or she finds us. When that happens, you two will attack from the front using your skills immediately, and me and T-Sub will support you from the back. Is that clear?”
“Understand.” (Reavertooth)
“We take part.” (Ivorythief)
“Yes, master.” (T-Sub)

Whatever. Let’s do the witch boss for the boys.

Hopefully Thiefmaster doesn’t get lucky or smart with NPC pathfinding.