Isekai Speedrun

Spectator Mode: Young Ladies Tea Party



In Mirim’s mind, this strange place she called home – the quiet corridors of Starfish Mansion – felt even more eerie when her friends were gone.

Speedrun, Test Subject, Crys and Kimono had all gone into a previously sealed, dangerous roomworld under the mansion. When those four were out (and Dancer wasn’t dancing in the halls anymore), Mirim was the one left in charge.

“I’m worried about them.” (Mirim)
“Do not worry, miss Mirim, the Chosen Hero is with them. They will surely return.” (Kurdt)
“I can’t help but feel a bit lonely. Speedrun always tells me I’m going to be alone here in the future, but I don’t have to worry about feeling lonely because I won’t have normal human emotions at that point anymore. How should I feel about that?” (Mirim)
“I cannot offer any advise other than express my sympathy for the inevitabilities of our destinies. My dream-lights cannot reach a future so far beyond the horizon, but I’m inclined to trust master Speedrun, because he is the one who was called from above, by yours truly.” (Kurdt)
“I trust him too, but still...” (Mirim)

In Mirim’s opinion, Speedrun was a kind and understanding person, but he had a weird habit... well, he had many weird habits. But there was one habit that Mirim felt was rude to the point of being obnoxious: he occasionally curtsied up and down on top of the deceased like mocking their deaths by dancing. Even if the corpse of the enemy was far away, he moved up and down wherever and whenever he happened to shoot them dead.

In the past, Speedrun had explained that it was probably the stress from gunfights why he did these motions automatically and without thinking. He also said that it depended on the context what the movements actually meant; in most cases, it was a show of disrespect, but in a different context it was a greeting or a show of affection.

Mirim saw him do it to Caliph Tze’s corpse for the first time. At that time, it was clearly done in disrespect.

And Speedrun doing it was one thing, but now the children at the orphanage school had started imitating him. She hoped they would stop doing that, but felt conflicted about forbidding something Speedrun did.

“Miss Mirim, my eyes may fail me, but isn’t that there, approaching in the hallway, the young princess of Pikatrate?” (Kurdt)

Mirim looked down the long and wide main hallway of Starfish Mansion. Princess Achlop from the Pikatrate roomworld was indeed approaching. She was walking alone, but her steps were resolute and lively.

Mirim concluded that there wasn’t any problem.

“She doesn’t have any guards with him.” (Mirim)
“That is certainly unexpected. A royalty rarely moves without a retinue... Aha, I know! She must be curious about where everyone went today.” (Kurdt)
“She asks difficult questions when she visits...” (Mirim)

Mirim took a sip from her wine goblet. While Kurdt had already emptied most of the wine bottle, Mirim was still finishing her first goblet.

Princess Achlop arrived in the Checkpoint area.

From Achlop’s perspective, this particular stretch of hallway where lord Speedrun and lady Mirim used to do strange experiments in the past had suddenly turned into a royal lounge where lady Mirim spent her time like an innkeeper waiting visitors behind a counter.

This semi-circle arrangement of tables, chairs, couches, carpets, pillows and curtains under a gaberdine canopy on side of the main hallway was a ‘test site’ called Checkpoint. At first, there was only a long table and two chairs; a temporary rest area for Speedrun’s movement tests. Then some carpets were added, and over time it grew into a permanent campsite in a hallway – like a luxurious gazebo, or a grand open tent used on a royal excursion.

Behind the Checkpoint, few doors and corridors down, at the very end of the main hallway, was an unbelievably heavy circular door slightly ajar. Behind that door was a roomworld called Petrified Garden where high lord Sorry Man, the mysterious leader of the high lords of hallways, lived with her first wife Rainwoman.

Achlop had never seen that place. Checkpoint area was a border she wasn’t allowed to cross.

Achlop maintained a friendly smile as she offered her greetings.

“Lady Mirim, lord Krúrick. I am happy to see both of you in good health.” (Achlop)
“Thank you, princess.” (Mirim)
“Welcome to our humble encampment, princess. May I ask what happened to your retinue?” (Kurdt)
“Yes, I sent my bodyguards and maids away today. They are obviously worried, always worried entirely, but I insisted on coming here today by myself. The reason for this is simple: my wish is to have a discussion with lady Mirim.” (Achlop)
“Oh, discussion between you young ladies! This old one should take his drink and leave then!” (Kurdt)
“My sincerest apologies, lord Krúrick. My intention was not to chase you away.” (Achlop)
“No, it’s arl… its’ alright. Sorry, it seems I’ve had too much wine today. I’m celebrating, you see, but it’s a secret celebration, shh. Oh, I should get something more to eat than these grapes and, aah... That’s right, the Chosen One isn’t here tonight to cook food. What should I do…?” (Kurdt)
“Lord Krúrick, may I suggest a meal prepared by the head chefs of Pikatrate court? They will gladly prepare whatever dish you wish. I always bring the recipes and culinary statements from lord Speedrun to them to replicate. Please use my royal name as you enter the palace.” (Achlop)
“Oh, that sounds wonderful. However, I feel it would be rude for me to appear into a royal court as drunk as I am now. Would it not be rude? I think it would be rude. Perhaps I’ll pay a visit tomorrow. After all, the familiar taste of master Speedrun’s cooking will be absent several days after this.” (Kurdt)

Kurdt emptied his wine goblet, stood up and left the Checkpoint area while waving his hand.

“Lady Mirim, I am crown princess Achlop Bakhou of the Pillars of Pikatrate entirely.” (Achlop)
“Yes, I know...?” (Mirim)
“Ah, since this time I have come to meet you privately in official manner, it is our custom to announce our full name and title, even if it’s a meeting with close friends or family members.” (Achlop)
“I see. Then, I am Mirim... Death Machine... of the Cursed Ones. Guardian of Doors. School teacher. Sniper of the Revolution Movement.” (Mirim)

Mirim tried to remember the names and titles she had learned from others. They all seemed inappropriate or inadequate for what Achlop was asking.

“...Just call me Mirim, princess.” (Mirim)
“Yes, lady Mirim, please continue using my first name as well! A while ago, master Speedrun himself suggested in a casual conversation that you and I should become closer friends. Ah, apologies for immediately jumping into the actual topic without any preparatory steps, but since we have now introduced ourselves in a private setting, should we try to talk casually as friends?” (Achlop)
“Um, are we not already friends and speaking casually? We have both lived in this place for a long time...” (Mirim)
“Yes, that is true somehow, but we have not properly expressed and established our mutual relationship as representatives of our people. This private meeting is a wish of both myself and lord Speedrun. His exact words to me were: ‘You should become close friends with Mirim while she is still flesh and blood because it will be hard to create a close relationships when she takes her final form’.” (Achlop)
“I see, I understand. If big brother Speedrun thinks so, it should be correct to do so.” (Mirim)
“May I sit down?” (Achlop)
“Ah, yes, um, but I do have to leave when those two... uhm...” (Mirim)

Mirim hesitated, picked up the two Vampire Rifles propped against a chair next to her, looked around, and placed the rifles on the sofa behind her.

Achlop bowed again and sat down on the chair.

Mirim pointed at the wine bottle Kurdt had left on the table. There was still some wine left at the bottom.

“Thank you, but I should not.” (Achlop)
“I shouldn’t drink this either. Kurdt brought it here and poured me one saying that drinking alone is lonely, but I don’t like the taste. Speedrun always says that alcohol is just spoiled sugar that debuffs reflexes and deals status damage.” (Mirim)
“Ah, speaking of health, I’ve heard many mentions about your future transformation, mainly from master Speedrun, but from others as well. The exact details are rarely mentioned, however. May I ask about this transformation directly from the person herself?” (Achlop)
“Speedrun knows better than me... Really, almost everything I know is only what he has told me. When I die or get seriously hurt, my body turns into a machine part by part. Ultimately, I will become something like a mechanical doll. And then I will be strong enough to carry that.” (Mirim)

Mirim pointed at a rectangular wooden crate next to the hallway wall. Achlop could guess that there was some kind of unbelievable weapon inside the crate.

Most things in the Checkpoint area were weapons of some kind, and lady Mirim spent a lot of time cleaning and taking care of them. There were piles of dirty cloth rags, various brushes and oily leather gloves under the table.

Achlop made a mental note that she should send maids to pick up the rags and wash them.

“Lady Mirim, I admire your bravery. Are you not afraid of dying?” (Achlop)
“...I am afraid, but it’s how it is. Speedrun says my personality changes to something cold and inhumane when I die, so I will become, uhm... how did he put it... cold, collected, and in full control? I’m not sure about turning cold, but I do wish to become more composed.” (Mirim)
“I think lady Mirim is already elegant and collected person somehow.” (Achlop)
“Thank you. I don’t feel that way, but I’m happy to be praised by a princess.” (Mirim)
“Oh, being a princess of a small kingdom is not much compared to you, lady Mirim! All of you are our saviors. As the guardian of these hallways, you are equal to a queen in every way.” (Achlop)
“No, I haven’t done much anything... It’s all thanks to Speedrun that we are here.” (Mirim)
“He had done a lot for us as well. I believe that without him the sacred door would still be closed, and I am truly thankful to all of you who have accepted us to this wider world outside. Living under these long ceilings is a privilege; a whole other world I could not even imagine in the slice of timespace of our roomworld.”
“Slice of timespace... Those sound like words Speedrun would say.” (Mirim)
“Yes, speaking of that, allow me to open an important discussion topic: I believe the future of Pikatrate lies outside of our roomworld. If the prophecy of Speedrun is true, the fate of our tribe is to eventually leave our homeworld for good. Are you aware of the details of lord Speedrun’s prophecy?” (Achlop)
“No, please tell.” (Mirim)
“According to lord Speedrun, our roomworld is just a small part cut from a larger whole: a slice of timespace ten thousand years tall and hundred thousand steps wide. Pikatrate is a closed box created by the Outsiders called Strangers, with a limited amount of both time and space inside. We live in a roomworld where ancient past and far future do not exist, and the ocean around our island stretches endlessly to eternity in all directions, yet this infinity is inside a limited room. This is something I cannot understand, but so he explained it, calling it ‘noneuclidean’ somehow. Our tribe cannot live in this closed box forever because the limited time cut off from eternity will eventually come to an end and Pikatrate roomworld will collapse in itself. It won’t happen during the lifetimes of current generations, but our descendants must certainly learn how to live outside and prepare for the eventuality of the collapse.” (Achlop)
“I had no idea… That sounds scary. This place is still strange and scary even after living here for a long time. All these doors leading to different lands, or in the middle of unknown oceans, or even high in the sky. It’s unsettling to think what kind of things might live even on the other side of this wall here...” (Mirim)
“This is exactly why I wanted to talk to you privately, lady Mirim. Since you are the one who will live here in some form for the longest time, as the guardian of these hallways.” (Achlop)
“…I understand. You don’t need to worry about it, princess. As the Guardian of Doors, I welcome you and your tribe. I promise I will always welcome you to live here, in these hallways and rooms, as long as I am here.” (Mirim)

Achlop grabbed Mirim’s hand and gently held her fingers.

“Thank you, lady Mirim! Truly, I am grateful to hear those words! May I receive this promise written in blood?” (Achlop)
“Eh? You mean like Crys?” (Mirim)
“The contract I signed with my blood with lord Crystal back then, you see... Somehow, I’ve come to understand our situation better since then. Having another contract, a separate contract with lady Mirim alone, would put my mind at ease. It would also ease the minds of the elders of Pikatrate and the mind of my father.” (Achlop)
“I’m not sure if I can write such a thing...” (Mirim)
“Apologies for pushing this topic, lady Mirim. However, since you are the one who will ultimately uphold the validity of any contract in the future–” (Achlop)
“Um, I do understand why you’re asking this from me, but the only contract I’ve ever seen is the one I signed with Crys. I’m not one to know how to write contracts between nobles. Discussing this with Speedrun would be the best...” (Mirim)
“Yes, of course, I will discuss this with him. Still, it is ultimately you who will walk these hallways in the future of our grandchildren. I would somehow advise you to hold more confidence in yourself and believe in your own power. I truly hope you will be there for them, as their great ancestor and as their guardian, as their guide and protector.” (Achlop)
“Um… I hope I can be of help. It is a heavy responsibility. I’m not sure what kind of promises I can make about my second self, but Speedrun says I will become less and less scared as my emotions start to fade and my insides are replaced with machinery… For optimal effect, he says, I should take certain poisons before I turn thirty and let my insides turn before the outside… But this is something at least decade in the future... But, um, there’s one thing I can do now. I can show you a glimpse of what I will look like immediately after the transformation.” (Mirim)

Mirim withdrew her hand from Achlop’s grip and lifted her eye patch.

For the first time, Achlop saw Mirim’s machine eye: a jewel-like red sphere embedded in a cavity of black crystals resembling reptilian scales. The red jewel glowed and flickered like fire’s reflection in a pond.

“A-ah...!” (Achlop)
“This is how I will look before new skin grows over crystallic machinery. My whole body will be something like this on the inside, and some time on the outside. I fear that perhaps the future generations of Pikatrate will treat me like a monster that must be hunted rather than a guardian or protector. Or maybe as someone who is shunned and excluded instead of someone capable of writing and upholding contracts.” (Mirim)
“A-a…” (Achlop)
“It is ugly, is it not?” (Mirim)
“No, no, certainly not! I was just surprised and speechless entirely somehow! It’s pretty and shiny, beautiful and brilliant, like a gemstone displayed in a box of boiled lea– not boiled leather! A red pearl inside a black flower, beautifully padded with soft black cloth entirely.” (Achlop)
“A red pearl in a black flower?” (Mirim)
“Y-yes, somehow! There is certainly beauty I see rather than hideousness! Please do not worry, lady Mirim, we at Pikatrate judge people based on merits and actions rather than appearances entirely. We will forever teach our children to not judge people by the glow of their eyes. I solemnly promise this as the next queen of Pikatrate.”
“It’s alright...” (Mirim)

Mirim lowered her eye patch and Achlop sensed that she shouldn’t push this topic any further.

“Th-then, let us talk about a different topic entirely! To celebrate our closer relationship, may I suggest a casual talk over a cup of afternoon tea in Pikatrate palace after this? I would like to show you the new beautiful tapestries and statues that our skilled artisans have created in honor of the lords and ladies of hallways. If you visit us regularly, everyone will surely become accustomed to yout vis–” (Achlop)
“Oh, it’s Kim.” (Mirim)

Achlop immediately closed her mouth and turned her gaze to the long hallway behind her.

Dragon Kimono was coming.

Her steps were fast but elegant to the point that Achlop subconsciously straightened her back like during royal ceremonies. Her magnificent red and white garment seemed to flow and whirl with every step like autumn leaves dancing in the air as if there was a light gust of wind pushing her forward.

When Kimono stopped in front of the table, she raised her hand and a metal stick appeared like she had pulled it out of thin air. She slammed the one-meter long metal stick on the table in front of Mirim.

“Brother and I have returned. The others went outside as planned. Give this piece of scrap to the fool when he returns.” (Kimono)
“Yes. Thank you, Kim.” (Mirim)
“Lady Kimono, I am happy to–“ (Achlop)
“Tch.” (Kimono)

Kimono ignored Achlop with a click of a tongue. She gave Mirim a slight nod and left the Checkpoint with the same swiftness and elegance as she had arrived.

“…Lady Kimono is indomitable as always.” (Achlop)
“Don’t take it personally, princess. She dislikes royalty and nobility in general. I’m sure she doesn’t mean anything bad to you as a person.” (Mirim)
“I understand. There are nobles with temperament in my father’s retinue as well. To tell you the truth, I was long treated as perfunctory and frivolous child whose ideas and words do not carry any weight – although this changed overnight somehow when you opened the door. However, if I may come to his defense, calling lord Speedrun ‘fool’ is quite rude, is it not?” (Achlop)
“You don’t need to mind about that. Speedrun told me he takes it as a compliment. It seems that in his homeland jesters are greatly respected and important members of court who can both advise and mock royalty without fear of punishment.” (Mirim)
“Is that so? Pikatrate court jesters do not have such privileges. Perhaps this is something that needs to be changed when I become the queen. Speaking of lord Speedrun’s homeland, is it true that he was born a commoner in a kingdom neighboring this one?” (Achlop)
“If that’s what he said, then it must be so… But, um, since Crys and Kim have returned, I’m sorry to say, I was going to... You see, we are currently setting up something in the orphanage school, so I should go outside and visit that place today, so...” (Mirim)

Mirim was preparing to leave the house. Achlop knew that Mirim went out regularly to educate young members of the Revolution Movement in a place called Orphanage School and she was proud of her work there. Yet somehow, to Achlop’s chagrin, Mirim still lacked in confidence when it came to making decisions for herself.

It was quite clear that she treated lord Speedrun like a teacher or older brother, and aspired to become a teacher similar to him, even going so far as to occasionally imitate the cadence of his voice and his mannerisms.

“The orphanage school, I understand. Then, let us–“ (Achlop)
“Ah, do you want to join me? Have you been outside before? I mean, have you stepped out of the front door of Starfish Mansion?” (Mirim)
“Ah, I have seen the outside: a vast world under dark overcast, full of rain and fog. However, I cannot go there, I’m sorry to say. Lord Speedrun and lord Crystal have prohibited me from using the main entrance. My loyal subjects would also be worried, if I were to suddenly leave without proper procedures.” (Achlop)
“Ah, of course it’s like that! You’re a princess of a different country, so this place and outside are like different countries… I’m sorry, I completely forgot how it is for a moment. I should remember these things as the Guardian of Doors, I even wrote it down in my notebook, this is embarrassing...” (Mirim)
“Please do not worry about it, lady Mirim. This rule was set upon Pikatrate from the start and it hasn’t been discussed since its inception. It’s natural for lords and ladies in high places to forget minor details.” (Achlop)
“Thank you for being considerate, princess.” (Mirim)
“Please, lady Mirim, you do not need to call me princess nor queen. Then, would tomorrow be a good time?” (Achlop)
“Eh...? Ah, right, tea. Yes, tomorrow should be fine for a cup of tea.” (Mirim)
“Wonderful! Then we shall continue to discuss our friendship over a cup of tea tomorrow.” (Achlop)
“Sorry for being busy today when you even came all the way here – oh, wait! I just had a good idea! Since you are here, you should do your best to create closer friendship with big sister Rain too. You can ask her for a cup of tea today.” (Mirim)
“H-haa…” (Achlop)

Achlop’s face went pale and her voice cracked.

“Is there a problem?” (Mirim)
“No, no, no! I would be happy to talk with lady Rain! It’s just that she, lady Mirim’s older sister… she is very scary person, somehow...” (Achlop)
“Hm? Ah, did Speedrun told you to not become friends with my sister?” (Mirim)
“No, no such thing! Although there was, um, talk about... Lord Speedrun did warn me not to offend her and be careful around her. I have ordered all Pikatrate envoys to keep a respectful distance somehow… But since she doesn’t often leave this wing of the house, there hasn’t been any practical opportunities to talk with her in the first place. A certain empty space of haze exists, unfortunately, between us entirely...” (Achlop)
“If so, you should try to be friends with her, princess. She’s not a scary person, you can talk with her. She looks grumpy, but she is not angry at people, usually... Ah, I really have to go before they start wondering why I’m not coming. How about this: I will tell Rain to meet you in the Garden Room later today. She might say no, but don’t take it personally, she is like that. Can you wait until dinnertime? She has to collect her dinner herself today, so she will go to the front of the house anyway. If she doesn’t come in the Garden Room, I’ll try to bring her to Pikatrate room with me tomorrow.” (Mirim)
“H-haa…” (Achlop)

Achlop felt like she had just taken a bite too big to chew.


At midday, when Achlop returned to Pikatrate in a hurry, she immediately went through the most intense process of selecting appropriate clothing and makeup to make a good first impression on her first formal meeting with lady Rain.

Then the elder tea maids of the court quickly repeated previous lessons about how to boil water properly and handle the tea pot without their help.

In the afternoon, Achlop waited lady Rain’s arrival in a small and pleasant roomworld called Garden Room. For more than two hours, she kept warming an old tea pot – one of the tea pots considered national treasures of Pikatrate – over a fire bowl again and again to keep it ready, wondering if lady Rain would actually arrive at all.

When Rainwoman finally arrived in the Garden Room, Achlop immediately jumped up from her seat and curtsied. Then she immediately felt troubled and wondered if there had been a major miscommunication and misunderstanding somewhere: Rain came in dressed for a gunfight, not for a tea party.

She wore a black duster coat of waxed canvas, black ammunition boots and purple-black goatskin gloves.

“Lady founder Rain, it is an honor to see you in good health! Welcome to this peaceful tea party for us two!” (Achlop)
“...Mirim asked me to come here.” (Rain)

Rain’s sharp green eyes stared at Achlop with suspicion. Achlop felt that making any sudden move under her gaze might lead to death.

“...Who are you?” (Rain)
“Apologies, this one somehow forgot introductions! This one is crown princess Achlop Bakhou, the future queen regnant of the Pillars of Pikatrate entirely. We have met in passing several times before. Our first meeting was at the time you arrived into our small roomworld and opened the ancient door to greater hallways.” (Achlop)
“So you are that princess...” (Rain)
“Yes, I am princess Achlop of Pikatrate.” (Achlop)
“Your clothes are different. You look different.” (Rain)
“Apologies! I understand it is difficult to recognize me since I am wearing the ceremonial clothes of my position in the court and these bright red shades of royal makeup were done in a hurry. Please do not mind my appearance.” (Achlop)

In her mind, Achlop kicked herself for trying too hard and turning her face unrecognizable.

“What do you want then?” (Rain)
“I would like to talk with you.” (Achlop)
“That my sister told me. About what?” (Rain)
“Many things, I would like to talk about many things. My deepest wish is to form a closer and friendlier relationship with lady Rain.” (Achlop)
“...Why?” (Rain)
“Ah, I do not wish to become a nuisance in any way! I only wish to maintain customary relationship. I believe that as people who live under these same ceilings we should all learn to know each other better to prevent misunderstandings, and to better cooperate for greater peace and prosperity in these great hallways.” (Achlop)
“You want to be friends?” (Rain)
“Yes, it would be my honor to be your friend!“ (Achlop)
“...Sure.” (Rain)
“Thank you, lady rain! Then, would it also be possible for me to speak with lord Sorry Man somehow?” (Achlop)
“No.” (Rain)
“It would be a great honor to speak and befriend high lord Sorry Man.” (Achlop)
“I said no.” (Rain)
“Ah, apologies for stepping out of line and shamelessly asking for an audience right from the start! Then, if you would like to – Ah, I would be delighted, if you would join me for a main meal in the Pikatrate palace later!” (Achlop)
“...Why?” (Rain)
“To discuss various things and become friends.” (Achlop)
“...I came here to talk, so speak what you want.” (Rain)

Achlop took a deep breath and tried to calm herself.

“I’m feeling very nervous somehow, apologies for showing such a shameful side of myself. Then, um, I would like to ask some questions, if that is fine?” (Achlop)
“Sure. Just ask.” (Rain)
“Ah, but first... Would it be better to sit down and drink some tea? I’ve prepared this tea for us myself. I’d like to know many things about you and lord Sorry Man, and your sister lady Mirim, and of course, ask questions about you.”
“Like what?” (Rain)

Achlop expected Rain to sit down, but she kept standing. Rain kept curling her fingers and glancing around the luxurious garden, as if expecting surprise attack from behind the pruned cherry trees.

Under Rain’s long coat, Achlop could see four revolvers attached to belts, with multiple neat rows of ammunition. These were the kind of hot weapons Pikatrate elders wanted the most.

“For example, for example: how could I become more like you?” (Achlop)
“Become… like me...?” (Rain)
“Apologies, is what I’m asking impossible after all?”
“…Why?” (Rain)
“T-then, for example, for example, what kind of place is your homeland? Would you be willing to tell me where were you born, lady Rain?” (Achlop)
“...In a sarcophagus.” (Rain)
“Apologies, I do not know that place. Is it a roomworld like Pikatrate, or is it one of the lands outside?”
“No. It’s not.” (Rain)
“Your family house? Did you live there with Mirim and your parents?” (Achlop)
“We don’t have parents.” (Rain)
“Ah, lady Rain and lady Mirim are – I see, y-you were also orphans. I’m sorry.” (Achlop)

Achlop took out a handkerchief and dabbed the corner of her eye in a ritualistic fashion.

“First that and now this...” (Rain)

Rain sat down on the garden chair Achlop had prepared, took off her thin leather gloves, grabbed the cup of warm tea and drank the sweet liquid with one swig.

“Ah, I hope the meadowsweet tea fits your taste, lady Rain. The leaved were prepared by the teamaster of Pikatrate palace and the honey was collected from the densely forested roomworld ne–” (Achlop)
“You want to know about me and my past?” (Rain)
“Ah, y-yes! I would be honored!” (Achlop)

Rain placed the delicate ceramic cup carefully back on its plate. Then she looked over Achlop’s shoulder for a moment. Various shades of anger dyed her face before she opened her mouth.

“We were born at the bottom of a dungeon in a sarcophagus machine. There were seven of us. Me, my sisters, my brothers: Mirim, Shaper, Sand, Locust, Lightburner, and Hollow. My memories from that time are in pieces. My earliest memory is the face of a Caliphate soldier looking at me through the transparent lid of the sarcophagus. I screamed at him to not open the lid because I though I would die. I heard my brother Shaper scream that he wasn’t ready to be born. Caliph Tze found us, took us out, imprisoned us. He wanted to use our curses. We were probably created by Strangers. Experiments, living weapons, something. That bastard Tze said we were created to be used.” (Rain)
“Your sisters and brothers...” (Achlop)
“Five of us died. They kept me alive in an underground prison. Sorry Man was there, and many others. They used us in experiments. Sister Mirim and brother Shaper managed to escape, but brother died. Everyone lived in pain and then died. For a long time, I thought I was the only one alive. I tried to forget them. But Mirim survived outside. She was in a dungeon mine and survived as a slave hiding her power.” (Rain)
“I-I see…” (Achlop)
“Then those three appeared. Crystal, Speedrun, Kimono. And the fourth one who died, I forgot his name.” (Rain)
“Lord Dancer?” (Achlop)
“They came down there and released me and Sorry Man. I started to remember things again. We traveled north and saved Mirim. Then we killed Caliph Tze. And now we live in this place. End of story.” (Rain)
“…Lord Sorry Man and lady Rain met each other in p-prison… and lord Crystal and others helped you to escape… S-so that’s what happened...” (Achlop)

Achlop struggled to keep her hands from shaking. She had seen the torture caves and prison chambers of Pikatrate once and nightmares had followed ever since.

Achlop was aware that the high lords of hallways were treated as outlaws by many kingdoms outside Starfish Mansion, but hearing now that even lord Sorry Man and lady Rain were imprisoned and tortured like lowly criminals was a massive shock.

“Our lives are different. You are surrounded by servants in a luxurious palace. We were cursed from the moment we were born.” (Rain)
“A-apologies, I have somehow–” (Achlop)
“Be quiet and listen. I am nothing you want to be. If I cry, hurricane rises. If I laugh, lightning strikes. If my senses are numbed: hailstorm. When I’m in pain... When I feel pain or pleasure, a violent rainstorm follows. I was forced to feel everything down there. I was forced to feel everything over and over again in that place. They studied me, tortured me and drugged me to get the weather they wanted. I kept resisting and they kept coming up with new methods. That was my life when you were drinking tea.” (Rain)

Rain’s voice was calm and tired. Like she had told this story thousand times and in thousand ways.

“Then those people came and helped me. They found my sister and they showed us this place. I can see unchanging sky and Sorry Man is here with me. It rains outside, but I am under invisible sun. That’s why I’m here and that is enough. Is this what you wanted to discuss?” (Rain)

Achlop rubbed her eyes with a damp handkerchief.

“...Apologies, entirely...” (Achlop)
“My throat is dry. Your turn to speak.” (Rain)
“Y-you want to know about me?” (Achlop)
“Say whatever you want to say. I’ll listen.” (Rain)

After hearing about the shocking past of the founders, Achlop felt that the problems she had in her personal life seemed small and insignificant.

But then again, her life was of insignificant in the first place: she was a princess fated to become the queen. Her personal feelings about that had never mattered.

She had to fulfill her duty.

“Lady Rain, it is true that I have lived a sheltered and spoiled life. I still live that life somehow. I was born into the royal family of Pikatrate and I was surrounded by servants and maids from the start. The horrors of wars between tribes is something I learned only from old stories, although I have visited the old graves. I haven’t experienced anything truly painful or horrible, that is also true. Even the problem of usurpers in my father’s court was resolved by your arrival. This is why, please allow me to say this: I am eternally grateful to you. Like you were saved from prison, our people were saved from the confines of our roomworld. My heart was touched by your story and I truly thank you for telling me. I wish to do something to help you somehow. Is there anything I can do, is there anything you need? Please just ask.” (Achlop)
“...No.” (Rain)
“Whatever you need from Pikatrate, lady Rain, I can give you. My word as the princess is enough for half the kingdom to move. You can have a garden, a castle – everything I have is also yours to have. Our soldiers will march under lord Sorry Man’s command. All of you who opened the door for us, we are eternally grateful.” (Achlop)
“Sure. You’re welcome. Have we spoken enough?” (Rain)

Achlop tried to remember other topics she wanted to talk about. While thinking, she scratched the soft skin of the back of her hand with her immaculately filed and painted fingernails.

In contrast, Rain’s hands were rough and scarred, her skin cracked and uneven. Her fingernails had been permanently removed; only blackened, acid-burned nail beds remained.

Achlop knew Rain was only few years older than her, yet she seemed at least a decade older.

“Lady Rain, apologies for asking suddenly, but may I... hold your hands?” (Achlop)
“No.” (Rain)

Rain stood up with an annoyed expression on her face. The aftertaste of the sweet tea felt unpleasant in her mouth.

“Enough of this. If you want to eat food together with someone, ask Mirim.” (Rain)
“Apologies for taking your time, lady Rain, and thank you again for this. I am honored for having this counsel with you. I was honestly really afraid at first, but for the future relations of our peop–” (Achlop)
“You want advise for the future? Don’t try to break walls. They exist for a reason. Mirim will become someone like me. She won’t talk with you like this in the future. Ask Speedrun if you want to know why.” (Rain)
“Yes, I understand. I will ask lord Speedrun. Thank you for your kindness, lady Rain.” (Achlop)

Rain grabbed her gloves and was about to leave, but then Achlop suddenly remembered the most important thing and stood up in panic.

“Lady Rain, please wait! There is still one important topic I wish to discuss! Please allow me to use this rare opportunity somehow!” (Achlop)
“What?” (Rain)
“The issue of forming family ties between our factions. A political marriage between a lord or lady of hallways and Pikatrate royalty or a member of the Pikatrate court.” (Achlop)
“...Not interested.” (Rain)
“P-please wait! I am aware that lady Rain is lord Sorry Man’s betrothed, and the circumstances of other masters of this domain are also known to me. Because of that, after thinking many options, I wanted to ask your advise directly, as you are lord Sorry Man’s closest liaison. Lord Speedrun, lord Kurdt, or lady Mirim – which one of these three would lord Sorry Man prefer to become the parent of the next sovereign of Pikatrate?” (Achlop)

Rain stared at Achlop in plain confusion.

“...Ask Speedrun.” (Rain)
“Yes, I will definitely consult everyone in turn. I merely wish you could present these options to lord Sorry Man, these three who are preferred by Pikatrate court elders. We wish to hear lord Sorry Man’s opinion entirely. This may not seem like an urgent matter since we are all still in our growth years, but the elders of the court keep pressing me to take this approach. Please!” (Achlop)

Achlop went on her knees and lowered her head.

“I’m leaving.” (Rain)
“P-please wait! I apologize for talking shamelessly out of turn and asking your support directly! Many months have gone by since our first contact was signed and I strongly feel there exists a need to solidify the friendly relationship between our factions!” (Achlop)

Rain rubbed her forehead.

“Just ask Speedrun. He seems to know everything around here.” (Rain)
“Apologies, but allow me to confirm: is this disinterest also lord Sorry Man’s opinion?” (Achlop)
“...He doesn’t care. He doesn’t care for details.” (Rain)
“Ah, in that case I feel that lord Speedrun and lady Mirim are the best candidates. I do not wish to speak disapprovingly of lord Kurdt or lord Crys, but...uhm...” (Achlop)

Rain closed her eyes for a moment. The aftertaste of the tea kept irritating her palate.

“Do not bother me or Mirim with this.” (Rain)
“Yes, lady Rain, I understand. I also believe that lord Speedrun would be the most appropriate father of the next ruler of Pikatrate.” (Achlop)

Immediately after Rain closed the door behind her, Achlop slumped down on the grass.

Her hands kept shaking, but she clenched her fists triumphantly against her chest.


When Achlop exited the Garden Room and aimed to walk back to Pikatrate, she was suddenly startled by a figure standing in a dimly lit side corridor.

“Ah!” (Achlop)

At first she thought it was lady Rain, but the silhouette soon revealed the real identity of the figure.

“L-lady Kimono! You frightened me somehow!” (Achlop)
“We sure have a shameless princess here. Did you see a frightening monster?” (Kimono)
“N-no such thing! It was a sudden dark shadow that frightened me somehow. I am again delighted to see you in good health, lady Kimono.” (Achlop)
“Little girl sneaking around without guards. Vulnerable and all alone for the first time, scheming with Rainwoman.” (Kimono)

Achlop felt that lady Kimono was somewhat less scary now, after meeting with lady Rain. She kept her composure and forced a smile.

“Apologies, is there something wrong in forming friendly ties with an allied individual somehow?” (Achlop)
“If you think things will stay friendly and peaceful forever, you’re as naive as you’re flat.” (Kimono)
“Lady Kimono, is it not worth it to at least try to maintain peace and friendly relations?” (Achlop)
“You speak like that fool.” (Kimono)
“If lady Kimono means lord Speedrun, I do not think of him as someone foolish in that sense.” (Achlop)
“Your little scheme with that witch won’t come to fruition. It won’t change anything.” (Kimono)
“I understood that your esteemed brother lord Crystal returned from a dangerous journey as well? Is he in good health?” (Achlop)
“Do not ask about my brother.” (Kimono)
“Ah, apologies for shamelessly expressing my curiosity.” (Achlop)

Achlop curtsied and bowed, feverishly thinking how she could end this conversation on a good note. All the short discussions she had had with Kimono in the past had been full of insults from Kimono’s side and turned into petty arguments in the end.

Kimono looked in the hallway with a mysterious expression on her face, then turned back to Achlop.

“Brother is working.” (Kimono)

This perfectly normal answer lacking her normal derisive tone surprised Achlop.

She immediately discarded her plan to end the discussion quickly and felt that there might be a change to have a real connection.

“Ah, thank you for answering my question, lady Kimono! Indeed, your esteemed brother is a hard worker. If I may ask a somewhat discourteous question, is lady Kimono also working by following this foolish little girl around?” (Achlop)
“Maybe so.” (Kimono)
“Ah, I assure you that I am not a threat to your brother in any way nor interested in courting him. Pikatrate stands, and will always stand, eternally loyal to the lords of the hallways. The heroes who released us from the confines of our roomworld and showed us the greater world outside shall be veneered for generations to come.” (Achlop)
“Save your breath for someone who cares. You would be wise to keep guards at your door to make sure it doesn’t close again by some unfortunate accident.” (Kimono)
“Yes, thank you for your benevolent guidance, lady Kimono. I will carve your generous advice in my heart. I am certainly causing unnecessary stress to my subjects by walking here alone and vulnerable.” (Achlop)
“You’re not going call me for your tea party?” (Kimono)
“...Eh?” (Achlop )
“You’re not going to try to become friends with me and curry my favor, little girl? I can only take this lack of invitations as an insult.” (Kimono)
“Lady Kimono, I already understand clearly that you do not appreciate my presence, so for the continuing cooperation between our factions, I will somehow do my best to stay out of your and your esteemed brother’s way... Apologies for speaking my mind directly.” (Achlop)
“We have much in common in not liking each other.” (Kimono)
“Lady Kimono, If I may – apologies for speaking out of turn, but I feel I must use this rare opportunity to ask an impolite question: why do you point your daggers at me and my handmaidens every time? Ever since we first came here, our encounters have always been like this. Is this – is this how you live?” (Achlop)
“Oh, are you finally challenging me? Claws are coming out after all this time? Let’s see your sharp edges, little princess.” (Kimono)

Without taking a single step, Kimono suddenly left the shadows and appeared right in front of Achlop. She leaned forward like going for a kiss on the cheek, lips almost touching her ear.

“I could tear you apart like a piece of paper. You would do well to remember that.” (Kimono)

While Kimono’s cold whisper invaded Achlop’s ear, at the same time a mixture of exotic scents assaulted her nose: floral extracts, burned oils, citrus fruits; the black powder used in hot weapons; leather, silk, and waxed cloth; steel, iron, and soapberries; herbs, spices, and wine from today’s dinner.

“Y-yes…” (Achlop)

Kimono took one step back and appeared five steps away. And just as suddenly as the gamut of scents had appeared, it disappeared.

It was as if Kimono had released and sealed an aura of appellant miasma deliberately.

In a different situation, Achlop thought, this potpourri of fragrances, coupled with her sensual whisper, might have felt exceedingly pleasant.

“...Apologies, lady Kimono. I do not wish to start pointless arguments. Again, I apologize.” (Achlop)
“Thought so. Run home, flower girl.” (Kimono)

Kimono turned away with a mirthless smile.

Achlop bit her lip and opened her mouth again, forcefully ignoring her fear.

“Wait.” (Achlop)
“Targeting my back now? You sure change your mind a lot. Perhaps you will also change your mind about becoming an enemy.” (Kimono)
“Lady Kimono, I wish to honestly declare that I do not hate you. I may not like you, but I do not hate you. All of you who opened the door for us and helped our kingdom against evil usurpers amidst our people, we are eternally grateful. For all of you, you and your brother included. You are our saviors. As the princess and future queen of Pikatrate, everything we have is also yours somehow. I will never hate or betray any of you, no matter what.” (Achlop)

Achlop felt tears welling in her eyes.

“Is that all?” (Kimono)
“Is that not enough somehow?” (Achlop)
“Nice try.” (Kimono)

Kimono walked away without looking back.

Achlop had to stand still for a minute before she felt strong enough to move her legs, but at the same time she felt victorious yet again, in a way she had never felt before.

Lady Kimono’s actions carried a meaning beyond her harsh words. She did not ignore her as a superficial, insignificant little girl this time. She looked straight into her eyes and treated her as an individual powerful enough to be worthy of personal violent threat.

“...Thank you, lady Dragon. I will remember that fragrance.” (Achlop)

Her quiet words of gratitude didn’t reach anyone’s ears in the strange silent hallway of sealed doors.


Returning to the palace of Pikatrate, Achlop was welcomed back by her two closest handmaidens: Celal Nony and Sera Pioria.

Achlop dismissed all requests from court nobles for the rest of the day and walked straight to her bedroom.

She fell on the soft coverings of her four-poster bed, buried her face on a pillow and screamed.

After a while, she sat up on her knees and looked in the mirror. Her face looked like a mess, but she didn’t want to call a maid to clean it.

Celal stood patiently at the end of the bed.

“Your highness, are you in good health?” (Celal)
“Yes, everything is fine entirely. My heart is somehow tired, but as a whole this outing was much more fruitful than I expected. I can report to father that my first solitary diplomatic mission has been a success. I talked with mistress Mirim, and then I was unexpectedly able to talk directly with mistress Rain. On top of that, I spoke briefly with mistress Kimono. I feel that I managed to became closer with all three somehow, and I was able to convey our gratitude to all of them, both for ousting that traitor who tried to poison my father and for freeing us from the confines of this place. I’ve now spoken privately with all of them. All except high lord Sorry Man.” (Achlop)
“Were you able to convince lady Mirim?” (Celal)
“She is thankfully the most approachable one, but she keeps pushing me toward lord Speedrun and refuses to make decisions herself. But I believe I’ve made good progress in establishing a closer relationship. I have that kind of feeling.” (Achlop)
“Has the issue of the next heir been resolved then?” (Celal)
“Yes. Lord Speedrun, as expected, is the foremost candidate. Third lord after lord Sorry Man and lord Crystal, his influence is greater than his strength. There is no intimacy between him and lady Mirim, their relationship is that of a master and an apprentice, or that of adopted brother and sister at most.” (Achlop)
“Congratulations, your highness.” (Celal)
“Not at all. Sera is the one we should congratulate, should we not?” (Achlop)

Achlop and Celal turned to look at the third person in the bedchamber. Sera stood quietly next to the doorway and bowed awkwardly when her name was mentioned.

“Thank you... I mean congratulations somehow, your highness...” (Sera)
“Modest to a fault, this girl. Give her highness an answer she can hear.” (Celal)
“Thank you, your highness!” (Sera)
“I can hear fine, Celal. But it was unexpected somehow, their tragic past before they became lords of the hallways. My heart was moved by their past struggles. Even if they are powerful and mysterious beings whose status is far above us, they are still vulnerable humans with their own problems. I feel that many things are clearer now. It is the same what Sera says about master Speedrun: he is the glue that keeps joints together somehow.” (Achlop)
“Still, I must say that the ways of the high lords are mysterious. To choose a mere handmaiden like Sera over your highness... and not only that, but a handmaiden well past her growing years. How drab is the color of this choice. Apologies for speaking rudely, your highness.” (Celal)
“There is no great mystery, Celal. A man chooses woman based on qualities other than status and wealth. Somehow those qualities are the same that were present when Sera’s mother was chosen by my father.” (Achlop)
“Entirely the size of her chest?” (Celal)
“Not entirely. By her nature, Sera is a peculiar individual, is she not? Just like lord Speedrun is an eccentric individual somehow. I feel that these peculiarities are also qualities he seeks in a woman. Back then, when Sera flipped goblets playfully between her fingers while collecting them from the kitchen room table, I could already see a wisp of affection in lord Speedrun’s eyes.” (Achlop)
“Master Speedrun was looking at me already back then...?” (Sera)
“Yes, that was when I decided to add you to my regular retinue. You certainly did not realize his interest for a long time, but do not reveal this to him. In his opinion, it seems, you were entirely coquetting him on every outing and responding alike.” (Achlop)
“So it was already back then...” (Sera)

Sera tried her best to suppress a delighted smile.

“How oblivious can one be?!” (Celal)
“Celal, you cannot blame Sera for being oblivious and then express surprise that a handmaiden was chosen over a princess. Is that not the very reason she didn’t realize lord Speedrun wanted her?”
“...Apologies. Your highness is right. My upbraiding was wrong.” (Celal)
“I should have noticed earlier, I can only blame only my own foolish head… Apologies, your highness.” (Sera)
“Sera, you must understand that it was not only your appearance but also your jesterly actions and kindly gestures that caught his eye. Are you still doubtful of his affection? He has chosen and accepted you, and somehow does not seem to care to take any further concubines. You are in highly enviable position.” (Achlop)
“He still doesn’t allow me to shave his beard...” (Sera)
“That won’t change, Sera. Give up on that fantasy and be satisfied combing his hair and washing his back. He entirely will not allow anyone to keep a blade so close to his throat.” (Achlop)
“Do not even think of suggesting he plucks your hair, woman!” (Celal)
“I– I won’t... Shall I continue as before somehow, your highness?” (Sera)
“Yes, entirely. And Celal, I do not lament the fact that it was not myself who was chosen, and you shouldn’t either. I consider it a great fortune that lord Speedrun has chosen someone close to me as his betrothed. When the door opened, I thought of offering myself to lord Speedrun, judging him to be the most benevolent one, but that was quickly proven hopeless. For him, both my position and my youthful age are burdens rather than blessings. He keeps favoring me as the envoy between our people, but that is where his interest ends.” (Achlop)
“To not choose a beautiful royalty in her most delicate growth years, I simply cannot understand...” (Celal)
“Cease your jealous tirades entirely, Celal. Lord Speedrun indubitably comes from faraway land with customs different from ours. He firmly holds the opinion that a woman should be past her growth years before the motions.” (Achlop)
“Yet he favors a timid woman untutored in bedchamber who despite her age cannot stop playing with dolls like a child would.” (Celal)
“Apologies for causing trouble...” (Achlop)
“Sera, I feel that Celal is correct on this aspect. A pastime of a young girl must be something unpleasant to lord Speedrun who favors a mature figure like yours. Sera, you would be wise to never mention the dolls in your chambers to hold his affection.” (Achlop)
“I wonder... Ah, I mean yes, your highness! I will hide my dolls entirely!” (Sera)
“These events and these discussions I have pushed through today have only strengthened my resolve. Sera, you must be the one to win lord Speedrun’s highest favor.”
“Yes, your highness.” (Sera)
“Celal, do your best to help Sera in this.” (Achlop)
“Understood, your highness. It is unfortunate that he doesn’t drink enough to lose his senses or call other women to his room. Sera, describe your recent bedchamber acts to her highness.” (Celal)

Sera blushed and looked down.

“He puts it between my legs, but he doesn’t put it in...” (Sera)
“It’s the same as before then. What was that strange term he used for this act?” (Achlop)
“Soapland...” (Sera)
“Frustrating, is it not?” (Achlop)
“He said that if I want to, I should, um, bring a glass phallus for myself...” (Sera)
“Hmm? He suggested you would use a consoler even when his own manhood stays strong? Interesting. Continue.” (Achlop)
“Apologies, it is embarrassing to say...” (Sera)
“This is important. Does he massage you as before?” (Achlop)
“Yes, he wants us both to use our hands.” (Sera)
“Does he not use your anus?” (Achlop)
“Y-your highness…!” (Sera)
“Sera, you are the first one to obtain his favor. We must rely on your information in vulgar and romantic details both.” (Achlop)
“He has not put it there either…” (Sera)
“As expected, even his bedchamber manners remain outlandish. Sera, you must make sure lord Speedrun secretes his seed inside you. Inform me immediately when you need more fruit oils.” (Celal)
“Yes…” (Sera)
“Celal and Sera, the lords of the hallways are also humans with human weaknesses. Because of that, we must support them entirely, even if it means abandoning our traditions. My father must understand that their power, their knowledge and their weapons are our best hope against the inevitable second coming of the Omitted Outsiders who cursed our ancestors in this doomed world.” (Achlop)
“What about lord Sorry Man, your highness? Are you going to continue pursuing his favor?” (Celal)
“I feel it is still too early. Lord Sorry Man is a distant and elusive target. However, I was able to confirm again that lord Sorry Man always stays in the unseen castle in the middle courtyard, together with his first wife lady Rain. It is as expected; it will take time and effort to gain the trust and privilege to talk to him directly. Creating closer ties is a challenge, and if at all possible, becoming his second wife is the highest achievable goal... Until then, our warriors must keep training with the few new weapons we have acquired and remain ready to march under lord Sorry Man’s command.” (Achlop)
“The elder nursemaids are interested in lord Krurick. What should be done with him?” (Celal)
“Their chance of courting him might arrive sooner than expected. He is old and his seed is weak, his status lowest among the lords. He is already burdened by forgetfulness of the aged. However, he cannot be ignored entirely. Have the nursemaids entertain him and collect what can be collected when he arrives.” (Achlop)
“I feel that you have somehow grown up, your highness.” (Celal)
“I feel I must carve lady Kimono’s unspoken words to my heart and gain respect by showing strength instead of making polite requests to the elders. I cannot keep trying to please everyone. For our people, I must become queen worthy of their trust. Meeting with lady Mirim regularly after this... Yes, I’m sure we will learn to enjoy each others company. As the future coeval matriarchs of our people, our bond must only grow stronger.”
“I’m sure a great alliance will come to fruition, your highness.” (Celal)
“I can only hope that she doesn’t turn into someone like lady Kimono in the future… But enough of this talk, enough of all this serious talk, I am somehow exhausted! Come now, you lucky one, call all the maids to hear the news and prepare the sweetest tea for tomorrow.” (Achlop)
“Yes, your highness!” (Sera)

 

Next chapter in January 2024.


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