The Mad Rat’s Lab

“Are you rea… what the hell are you doing?”

Imagine my surprise when I turn around to ask Ricard if he’s ready and find him stretching. It shouldn’t be unexpected given the current situation, but that’s only if he didn’t look like a drunken chicken dancing around.

“Me? Stretching. Can’t you see?”

“I know, it’s just… you’ve never done this before, right? Why are you doing it today? I’ve never seen you doing exercise. Ever.”

“What!? I do exercise! …sometimes…”

Ahaha, look at him squirming around. If we weren’t inside the game, he would be sweating buckets right now.

“Don’t you mean you exercised? In past tense. For example… when you were forced to, in PE class?”

“Ugh, I… yes…” Contrary to what I expected, he quickly recovers from the shame. “...but it doesn’t matter! Because I’ve spent all my free time in games, learning everything you’d ever want to know! Hahaha! Ask me any question about DMA, and I’ll give you the perfect answer.”

Yeah… I’m not so sure you should be so proud about that. Also, no thanks. I’d rather die than give you a reason to start one of your ‘knowledge drilling’ sessions.

I turn to the dungeon awaiting us. “Let’s go. I don’t want to waste time like this.”

“Come on, ask me, Mad Rat! Are you ashamed of your lack of knowledge? If so, you just need to ask me to be your teacher and I’ll treat you as my most precious student!”

No thanks.

“Did you make the changes we talked about?” I ask, switching to another topic. Since this is about DMA, I’m sure it’ll work. “Did you remove all auras from your Champion?”

“Of course! Who do you take me for? I’d never make a single mistake regarding a build I have designed! Hahaha! I removed all auras and turned them into ice skills requiring activation.”

“Good job,” I nod.

“And don’t worry, I’ll carry you through this dungeon the best I can! It’s finally time to show the effects of all my training! …by the way, when are you going to ask your sister to teach me?”

“Ah, I forgot to tell you. I asked her and she said she was too busy.”

“Alright… what a shame...”

 I believe that’s an excuse she gave me to avoid being put into a bothersome situation, but I’m not going to say it. After all, if I were in her shoes, I’d have done the same thing.

“So… where did you take me today? Is this dungeon any good? I hope you didn’t take me to a human dungeon, did you?”

“Of course not! Although I’d rather prefer it if possible…” He stops talking when I glare at him. “... forget it. Khm! The dungeon I chose today has excellent ratings and it’s pretty famous. This is because it works completely different to any other dungeon you’ve seen so far.”

“Different? How?”

Don’t all dungeons have the same design? Fight monsters, discover traps, beat bosses, and finally destroy the dungeon core?

“You know that all dungeons follow more or less the same pattern, right? But not this one. Here, the main focus of the dungeon invasion is to escape and survive.”

“Escape and survive? Like when the monsters are too strong but you don’t want to die and look a way around them or wait until you’re healed? I’ve done that before.”

“Tsk, tsk, tsk!” Ricard annoys me with his tongue clicking. “I’m not talking about that. Didn’t I tell you that this dungeon is different?”

“... can you please explain?”

I hope I’m not going to regret this.

“Alright! I’ll illuminate the poor you with my unending knowledge! Hahaha!” …I’m regretting it already. “Did I tell you that this dungeon has a recommended player level of ‘under level ten’? The reason behind that is that this dungeon’s main feature is a single, absurdly powerful boss. If you were to bring high-level characters, it’d ruin the experience. That’s why it has a level recommendation.”

“Aha… And?”

“This powerful boss will chase you during the dungeon invasion. But since it’s so strong, you can’t hope to defeat it, leaving you no option but to escape. This dungeon is so different from any other you’ve seen because you must keep track of the monster at all times, escaping and moving through terrain where it can’t reach you! Meanwhile, the other monsters will make the journey difficult for you. Some of them can even tell the boss your current position!”

Now that he has explained it, it does sound different. It isn’t unusual for special dungeons to appear from time to time.

Environmental dungeons, with no monsters, which you go into for the scenery; roleplaying dungeons where you must complete a quest or series of objectives; arena dungeons, with a single room where monsters constantly pour into…

Those are a few that come to mind. But this is the first time I’ve heard of a ‘survive the giant monster’ dungeon.

My gaze wanders from the pristine beach in front of us to the endless ocean. Right next to the horizon, there’s something glowing purple. It must be the dungeon core.

“We’ll be chased by a sea monster, then? Or is it a giant whale that eats you whole if it gets to you?”

Tired of waiting for an answer, I look at Ricard. Unlike his usual self, he’s staying quiet instead of quickly denying what I said and showing off how much he knows.

“...It isn’t funny when you guess it right…” He mutters.

I see. So that’s why he’s like that.

He looks like an abandoned puppy. Let’s try this to cheer him up. “But if you can fly, can’t you skip the whole thing?” I ask, knowing that he’ll quickly explain why I’m wrong.

“Tsk, tsk, tsk! Of course, you can’t! There’s an invisible barrier a meter over the sea level that prevents players from playing dirty. But why would anyone do it, anyway? Isn’t it more fun to play by the rules? Why would anyone come here to skip it instead of enjoying it?”

“...”

I remain silent to keep him unaware of the truth. He’s so innocent sometimes.

Meanwhile, my mind wanders off to my dungeon. I’ve seen that a lot of times: players who try to skip everything and then brag about their achievements. What a shame for them that these kinds of tricks don’t work in my dungeon and they end up dead instead.

A shadow moving under the water catches my attention, snapping out of my thoughts. “No way… is that… it can’t be, right?”

“We’re lucky! We’ll be able to see the boss before it gets dangerous! Hahaha!”

The shadow keeps getting larger and larger. When it seems it can’t grow anymore, the water starts rising, giving way to the monster’s body. Soon, a white island is created in the middle of the ocean.

I gulp at the ridiculous size of that monster.

There’s a short pause. Then, an enormous water geyser sprouts from the island, reaching a ridiculous height. The sheer amount of water expelled makes me shiver.

“Here it is,” Ricard says solemnly, “The Great White Whale. That’s the name of the monster we must avoid. Don’t you think it’s exciting? But don’t worry, with my extensive knowledge about the game and all the information I recollected, it’ll be easy peasy, hahaha!”

“Is that the monster we’re supposed to fight against!? How are you supposed to fight something so huge!?”

Ricard grins at my reaction. “Calm down, Mad Rat. We aren’t going to fight it. We’re going to avoid it.”

“I know, you said it before. But still…”

If I had to make a comparison, that monster is as big as the whole Rabbit Paradise in my dungeon. And that’s just the part we can see!

“The ocean is vast. There will be plenty of space to hide. Let’s go, let’s go under the sea!”

He cheerily swings his arms around as his feet touch the water, signaling for me to follow. With his Revenant Champion, it looks ridiculous, but my mind is preoccupied with something else.

I never thought I’d say this, but… Sometimes, he can be somewhat reliable. Somewhat, and only sometimes. I repeat it because it’s important.

As we move further under the sea, the sea life takes over. Fish and coral of every color you can imagine. Even the sunlight seems to glow in multiple colors, illuminating the seafloor in a myriad of colors as the waves move.

This is what you would expect from a Deep Seas dungeon. It’s been some time since the last time I entered one, but this is a first. I’ve never seen one with so much detail yet.

The happy scenery doesn’t last for long, though. The ground keeps going lower and lower until there’s enough water over us for the huge whale to freely swim. We’re in dangerous territory now.

I know in real life all light would disappear after a certain point, but this is a game and it doesn’t happen.

“Do we go straight to the end?” I ask. “From this point on, we could be attacked at any time.”

“You can try swimming in a straight line if you want. I wouldn’t recommend it, though. It’s the fastest way to become food for the boss.”

“Then what?”

“Let’s keep following this path. We’ll reach a forest soon.”

Path? What path is he talking abo– ah, I see it now. It’s hard to see, but there’s something resembling a path where corals don’t grow. I took it for granted, but there’s no easy path anywhere else.

Wait. Didn’t he say forest? A forest under the sea? I’m curious now.

“Why is there a forest under the sea? What kind of forest are you talking about?”

“Hahaha! Just wait a moment. We’ll soon be there.”

Aaargh, he’s so irritating! Why is he behaving like this? He’s usually so eager to explain everything up to the tiniest of details! So why is he leaving me filled with intrigue now!?

I look around, looking for the ‘forest’. Other than the coral and fish we’ve seen since a while ago, there’s just rocks and sand.

Ah, look at that algae. How weird. It grows straight up and continuously undulates as if dragged by the waves, but the waves are way above our heads. It’s kind of funny, though. Flat, wavy and long. It looks squishy.

As we follow the path, more and more of those algae appear. They grow taller, too. Is this what Ricard was talking about?

Short answer: it wasn’t.

Soon, the ground disappears. Or it seems to, due to the viewpoint. In fact, there’s a pronounced slope that makes it look like the ground disappeared.

Below, there’s an authentic sea of algae. The same funny algae that caught my attention. They’re as tall as trees and very close to one another.

“So this is the forest you were talking about.”

“It is. It’s best to see it for yourself, right? I didn’t want to spoil the surprise, hahaha!”

“Well… yes.” I reluctantly agree. This doesn’t make his behavior any less annoying, though. “Is there any other ‘surprise’ you’re saving for later? I’d rather not die to one of them.” At least this time it wasn’t dangerous.

“No. Not really. Let’s go! I’ll explain everything you need to know! Follow me! Hahaha! Oh, and don’t get away from me. The visibility should be pretty bad down there.”

When we enter the algae forest, the visibility drops to almost zero. No, I’m not kidding. It’s so bad that I can barely see Ricard or his floating specters, which are just a meter away. ‘Pretty bad’ was an overestimation.

This reminds me of a cornfield. Once you’re inside, it’s very hard to see anything other than the plants surrounding you, if not outright impossible.

“Ricard, I know you’re the tank and should go first, plus you’re the one who knows about this dungeon. But please, walk slower. It’s hard to keep up.”

“Fine… I’ll do it for my dear follower.”

“Shut up! I’m nobody’s follower!”

“You aren’t? But aren’t you asking everything to me? I’m the one who knows, and you’re the one who follows what I say. So you’re my follower, hahaha!”

What kind of logic is that?

“Now that we’re in the algae forest, you must be aware of the mermaids. They’ll attack us unexpectedly, taking advantage of the poor visibility. That’s why it’s important to stay close to each other. And then…”

I leave Ricard to his delusions and look around. Algae. Algae. Even more algae. Everything looks the same.

“Huh? What’s that?”

Something reflecting the sunlight, partially buried under the sand, catches my attention. I dig it up out of curiosity.

“Is this some sort of shell?”

What I have in my hand is an immaculate white shell, about the size of my hand. Its hard undulating surface perfectly imitates the waves of the sea.

“Hey, Baldy. Look here. You say that you ‘know everything’, right? Then… Is this something important?”

I show the shell to him, but right at that moment, it starts glowing with a bright white light.

“Ah, shit!” Shouts Ricard. “Quickly release that and run!”

Without hesitation, I throw the shell away and follow after him. I don’t know how I do it with the lack of visibility, but I somehow manage to keep track of him.

At the same time, a huge shadow starts approaching. It grows larger until all the sunlight is blocked.

“W-why is the whale here!?” I ask. “Is it because of the shell?”

Ricard, his voice faltering due to running, answers me. “Yes! The shell makes the whale come.”

“Then why didn’t you warn me!?”

“I… I forgot to tell you. Even the wisest of sages can forget to warn people sometimes.”

“But you didn’t forget about the freaking mermaids! Don’t you think this is more important!?”

“I… well…”

When everything is covered by the enormous shadow, the only light remaining is that of the shell I touched. Like a falling meteor, the colossal monster falls and crashes into the ground. The shockwave makes us fall to the ground.

“Thank god we could get away in time…” I struggle to get up.

“Ahahaha! It was close! Did you see that, Mad Rat? The size of that monster, and the force behind that crash? It’s amazing! One day, I’ll create an undead as imposing as that one. No, one that’s even bigger and stronger! I’ll become the strongest undead player! Hahaha!”

The whale, having missed its target, lifts up from the ground and starts circling the algae forest, searching for us.

I get closer to the point of impact. There’s nothing left. Where the algae forest used to be, there’s now a giant crater. Not even the ground remains.

“Alright… no more touching shells from now on.” I gulp.

Ricard’s reaction is the opposite of mine.

“Destructible ground and plants, huh? You can’t see this everywhere.” Ricard comments, slightly excited at the spectacle. “Only players over level fifteen can create destructible terrain!”

“This isn’t time to get excited…” I retort. “We almost died.”

 

There was always heavy competition between DMA players for who had the most original dungeon. This drove them to try and discover new ways to abuse the game systems, which was an equally pleasurable and headache-inducing situation for the DMA developers.