The Mad Rat’s Lab

The three monsters come at me at the same time. Despite their enormous size, they coordinate their attacks perfectly, avoiding collisions and forcing me to avoid them.

“You won’t get me like this.” I swing my axe to deflect the first attack. Then, I jump to the side to avoid the second and hide behind it to avoid the third attack. I roll on the ground and quickly stand up before swinging my battleaxe. “Better luck next time, huh, huh, huh!”

The three monsters roar in response, and the ground below me breaks apart. Another fire eruption must be incoming. I run away.

*Fwoosh! Bam, bam, bam!*

Several molten rock fragments fall from above, destroying everything in their path. I can’t evade on time this time, and two of them hit me. My HP falls by a quarter of its maximum.
A few lands on the monsters too, but like before, a reddish film appears upon contact and most of the damage is negated.

“Hey! It isn’t fair if we don’t both take damage!” I uselessly complain. “I thought we would have a straight fight. Fight me without tricks.”

The monsters glare at me with their reptilian orange eyes. I ran quite far trying to avoid the meteorites and the monsters can’t reach me from this distance. The ground starts shaking again, a signal that the monsters have started to move.

The trees break under their weight, revealing the monster’s body.

“Wait, what!? Why do they have a single body? But each one clearly has an HP bar on top of its head!”

I usually pay more attention to the monster’s behavior and combat skills than to their aspect, but this time I must make sure I’m not imagining things. It’d be horrible if something unexpected happened when I least expected it due to not having examined the monster I’m fighting.

The monster has three giant green mouths that easily blend with the surroundings when immobile. When they attack, they split up, revealing the red interior.

Their shape and traits remind me of a flytrap, but instead of the hardened leaf parts that make their tooth, the monster has a row of white and curved fangs. Like saliva, green poison drips from their tips.

There are two orange reptilian eyes on each head, and parts of the green skin have scales. I remember those eyes, I’ve seen them before on another monster, but I can’t remember where it was.

A thin neck extends from each head. They’re thin like stems but are as flexible as a snake’s body. They too are covered by scales that blend with the background.

The three necks connect to a single four-meter-tall lizard body. Its vibrant red scales shine mysteriously. This should make it easy to see the monster from afar, but their intricate patterns and the fact that they’re mixed with green tones make them look like flowers. When the first head appeared, I thought the monster was hiding. It turns out I could actually see it, but I thought it was part of the environment.

The monster has finally revealed itself, and I can confidently say it’s a giant flytrap-like hydra.

“I wasn’t mistaken, it’s a hydra with three heads. But it makes no sense… why does it have three HP bars…?”

Nothing in this damned dungeon ever makes sense! I’m tired of it! Why can’t a single monster be exactly what it looks like? Why must they all have stupid gimmicks that make everything difficult!?

‘Fuck you Evil Mastermind!’

I’d love to shout, but I don’t because dare to. I don’t want to make things harder for myself by provoking him.

I will survive! I will defeat this monster and achieve a full clear! Today’s the day I will recover my lost orc pride! Huh, huh, huh!

Or I’ll die trying.

“Waaaaaaah, I’ll kill you and emerge victorious!” With a shout, I raise my weapon and run at the enemy.

I clash with the central head as the other two try to swallow me whole.

When you’re as experienced as I am it’s easy to know the difference between a normal attack and one that tries to swallow you. In the case of the former, the attack aims at you; but if the monster is trying to swallow you in one bite, the attack must aim at a point a short distance behind you. Otherwise, they would bite you instead.

Being capable of identifying these things is what makes you shine in combat.

I drop to the ground to avoid the simultaneous attack from the two side heads. They were trying to sandwich me between them, but I reacted on time to avoid it.

While I’m rolling on the ground and the two side heads are disoriented by the clash, the central head takes this chance to strike. I feel an enormous presence getting close, its shadow stopping all the light. I simultaneously stand up and jump to the side, but I’m not fast enough and the monster’s teeth graze my leg.

I immediately check the status screen, something indispensable in this damned dungeon. I’d ignore it in any other dungeon, but not here.

“Ah, shit… I got poisoned.” This poison not only deals damage but also slows. “But at least I avoided being swallowed.”

As if laughing at me, the three heads retreat and stare at me with their orange eyes. It feels like being stared at by a predator that’s playing with the food in front of it.

“Huh, huh, huh! I’ll get serious.” I won’t allow it to treat me like a plaything.

My skin turns red. My speed increases, and my damage and attack speed double. It’s the Frenzy skill, the strongest skill for any orc player. I can’t use any other skills while it’s active, but it doesn’t matter. I don’t need them to deal with this monster.

Thanks to Frenzy, the monster can’t keep up with my speed. Now I have no trouble avoiding its attacks and striking back. I focus all my attacks on the central head, hoping to kill it before the drawbacks of using Frenzy show up.

“Huh, huh, huh! Can’t keep up? Then, die!”

My muscles twitch in excitement. It’s exhilarating to feel this power coursing through my veins. It’s an addictive feeling.

A flurry of strikes land on the central head, its HP quickly falling. When the monster realizes it can’t do anything against me now, it roars and the ground splits up. With a thundering noise, another meteor shower falls to the ground.

I avoid the gap created by the skill and ignore the molten rock fragments. You must focus on dealing with the monster while Frenzy is active. The difference between dealing with three and two enemies is significant; if I eliminate one of them, the fight will be a lot easier.

In the middle of our intense fight, there’s one of those Pixies that comes close to us, attracted by the noise. But before I can complain, the central flytrap-like mouth eats it whole. It stops attacking and keeps the mouth closed. Soon after, its HP starts to recover.

“Fuck! Not this!”

I thought it’d be bad to have an annoying Pixie join the fight, but this is worse. I must stop the healing somehow! I can’t keep Frenzy up for long!

The central head retreats from the fight, leaving the other two to prevent me from getting close. But now that there are two of them, it’s even easier to avoid their attacks. I use the left head as a scaffolding to reach the central one.

In a do-or-die effort, I land on top of its head and start attacking it. The other heads try to shake me off, but I grab one of its teeth, continuing my flurry of blows.

Finally, the central head dies. The stem connecting it to the main body breaks and we start falling.

I deactivate Frenzy in the middle of the fall. I’ve lost 10% of my maximum HP because of it, I can’t afford to lose any more if I want to fight the remaining bosses. But then, as if waiting for this exact moment when I can’t move properly because of the fall and the shock of losing the extra speed from Frenzy, the right head takes this chance to strike.

I observe in terror as the gigantic mouth comes closer. There’s nothing I can do to avoid it.

Everything turns dark. I’m inside the monster now. Digestive juices fill the dark cavern and my remaining HP starts to fall like crazy.

“Nooooooo! Not like this…! Today was supposed to be the day I achieved a full clear…!” I stop resisting. Even if I get out, I’d be in no shape to face the remaining bosses. “This isn’t fair… it’s not my fault…”

Fuck you Mhah, it’s all your fault. If you didn’t go on your own and open all the doors, I would have killed the Minitaur Queen and the Overgorger by now.

Orc brothers don’t fight when in the middle of enemy territory. They solve their problems when they’re back in their villages.

I’m so looking forward to it. Huh, huh, huh!

 

---

 

“Haaah, haah… A-are we far enough?” My voice shakes due to the tension.

Sir Orc sacrificed himself to allow us to run away. Now, we must act worthy of his teachings and achieve a full clear of this dungeon in his name.

“...why? Are you scared?” Mhah looks at me with superiority. “What are you going to do now that your precious sir Orc isn’t here? Are you going to cry? Waaah, waaah!”

Why is he so annoying all the time? Does he need to feel superior to the others? Is this why he’s constantly bullying me?

“S-shut up! It’s your fault we’re in this situation.”

Mhah’s face warps. “My fault? How dare you–”

“Stop!” Krut interrupts us. “Now isn’t time to fight. Look there.”

He points behind Mhah. We turn our heads and look in that direction, but the only thing behind Mhah is a tree.

“Are you scared of a tree now? And I thought the weak one was Diq. It turns out you’re worse than him. Sigh! Must I do everything?”

“Shut up.” It’s the first time I’ve seen Krut angry. “Don’t blame others for your own stupidity. We must go, right now.”

“Are you running away? Ahahaha! Cluck, cluck, cluck! Hahaha!”

 Krut ignores Mhah’s taunting and grabs my hand. He starts pulling. “Let’s go, Diq. If he doesn’t want to come, he can do whatever he wants.”

“O-okay…?” I allow him to drag me away.

“Yeah, run away! It’s the only thing you can do. At least I tried to progress this dungeon. The only thing you did was run away and search for you sir Orc! Noobs!”

I want to say something, but Krut puts a hand on my mouth before I can open it. “Mmmfh…?”

“Ssht. Don’t talk.” He warns me.

As we get further away from Mhah, I can finally see what Krut was talking about. There’s ‘something’ hiding in the vegetation. It slowly moves, inching closer and closer to Mhah and his Troll. No, not ‘something’ but ‘a lot of something’. I can see movement all around him.

“It doesn’t matter, I’ll do better without them. It’s you and me again, Troll. Let’s go and achieve everything ImAnOrc couldn’t, right? Hahah– Ugh… w-what’s this!?”

The monsters hiding in the vegetation suddenly attack Mhah from all sides. They undo their camouflage, revealing purple skin, a ferocious mouth, and lots of tentacles. They were copying the surrounding vegetation, that’s why they were so difficult to see.

They’re tentacled raptors. Like a dinosaur, but with many tentacles instead of the tiny hands they always have. Though they are only about a meter tall, they look dangerous. And there are at least ten of them!

They attack Mhah with a mix of bites and tentacle punches or swings.

“You fuckers! Don’t leave me alone!”

Hahahaha! You deserve it, Mhah! Now that sir Orc isn’t with us, there’s no need to put up with your stupidity anymore!

“Enjoy your new friends, Mhah! Hahahahahaha!” My laugh reaches him, and he shouts back.

“Come back! Cowards! Ugh… fuck!”

I hope this is the last time I hear him swear. Or hear him at all.

 

“Haaah, haaaah! Can’t you feel it? The amazing feeling of being devoured whole and digested inside the monster? No? How can’t you not enjoy such an incredible experience? Are you crazy!?”

- Famous words from… No, I don’t think you want to know any more about this.