Naruto: Mind over matter

"That's why you shouldn't of let the kid do these alone!"

I jump out of the way of the enemy ninja's kunai and [Pathmaker Jutsu] my own.

"Oh shut up Yamato! You didn't argue about this till things went bad"

I throw my kunai at the Rogue iwa genin, he jumps and my kunai curves upwards, I remain inhumanely emotionless as the kunai lands and I quickly throw another securing my kill.

"I knew it! I told you- But nooooo~ Anko says its fine so it must right!?

The genin behind me charges in and goes to strike at my chest with a kunai. He expects me to dodge like a human, to bleed with his second strike. I don't give him the pleasure. I twist my body and bend backwards, dislocating my knee and I swing my leg and sweep his feet from under him, I throw my last kunai and fix my leg.

"Fuck you bitch!"

The last two genin watch me closely, and one sprints forward while the other begins using hand signs.

"What did you call me!?"

The one at the back slams his hands down and summons an earthen wall behind me, the one charging me brandishing a sword.

"I was talking to the enemy, Yama-Dumbass"

I activate levitation, my chakra starts to push me upwards, like I did on the water I levitate one half and push with the other, I glide up the earthen wall and flip onto the other genins head and immediately jump-tch he nicked my calf with his blade.

"Maybe if you shut up and focus down the Rogue Jonin your facing, maybe, just maybe you might beat him quicker!"

Pushing towards the genin in the back with my levitation chakra, I [Body Shunt] into range and henge my hand into claws, sharp they slice open the neck of my enemy, gods it takes a lot to make the henge form sustainable claws that can actually do anything, how does Naruto make it look so easy?

Running low on chakra I turn around and dodge the last genin attacking me, he still manages to make a cut down waist.

No kunai? Shit.

Enough chakra to shunt once or twice yeah?

I [Body Shunt] away and get ready to [Body Shunt] slide tackle him but, ah only enough for one. Shit.

Jumping back on my good leg I scan my surroundings and see that Anko-sensei is almost done with her Jonin, and the Jonin and chunin that's facing Yamato are nearly through too.

I jump back again and kick up some dirt with my bad leg, and jump up high on my good leg again.

Tiny bit of chakra left what can I even do with it? I look at my wounds, only light cuts, the enemy is off by a few centimetres.

Coming back down I quickly henge myself a centimetre thicker, I don't have enough time and chakra to do details like adding cuts and wounds, lets just hope he doesn't notice.

I land, he blinks the dirt away from his eyes and charges me.

Centimetre... come on...

Centimetre.... work please...

I dodge just enough, bending my spine a little more than I should, but he grazes my henge and breaks it, I'm close enough to tackle and so I take my chances.

On the floor we go and our fight is reduced to a scuffle, as I try to keep him down.

5 seconds.

10 seconds.

15 seconds.

"Yamato, maybe you should try hitting them!"

20 seconds.

"Like your doing any better-"

I cut them off and shout at them.

"JUST SHUT THE HELL UP AND FUCK ALREADY! GOD DAMN IT DOUBLE-SENSEIS!"

they go silent.

30 seconds.

35 sec- a kunai penetrates the skull of my enemy.

Battle complete dropping [Manual Operations].

---

-11 days into hell training-

Huh that worked.

No more arguing, silent runs and blissful breeze.

I didn't think that it would work, thought they might just start arguing after the fight again while we cleaned.

It worked better than great actually, they refuse to talk at all, hallelujah I did it!

---

-12 days into hell training

*moan*

It backfired.

I have been forsaken by the old man.

Unless? He had horns. No, it cant be...

A symbol of horniness?

A prophecy I had yet to decipher!?

Either I'm making more sense than ever or they finally broke me!?

Damn you Horned Old man! Why did you forsake me!

Why did you-

(Distant)"ahhhhh~" "shh! Quiet dont wake Riku"

It was the third that did this.

He put me with them.

He made me suffer.

I will get revenge.

A prank that will trump any that Naruto has done just you-

(Distant)"holy hell, talk about wood!" "Hahaha, want another one?"

I give.

I'm sorry old man. I'm sorry Hokage-sama.

I give up, please repair my mind, please help me sleep!

---

-13 days of hell training-

Is this even training anymore? I have trained yes, but now it feels like a torture designed to kill me.

So just hell then?

"And s-so I ughh, no we think that-that we didn't get the whole education, ughh sexual e-education thing down last time and wanted to know if y-you would like a more informative demonstration?"

Yamato-sensei, as red as a tomato looks me anywhere but the eyes.

I look towards Anko-sensei and see her trying to- failing to hold back laughter.

"Anko-sensei you shouldn't tease him like that, you know Yamato-sensei can be very gullible"

After I finish my sentence Anko bursts out into a fit of laughter and Yamato looks out into the stars, probably trying to figure out how to wipe this memory from everyone's head.

"Pfft- hahahahaha, how did you think that-hahaha that she was, ahahahah!"

I go down with Anko-sensei, he is way too gullible not too laugh at....

I take a sharp inhale of cold breath... shit I'm screwed.

I like hanging out with Double-senseis.

I'm corrupted.

---

-15 days of hell-

Is it hell anymore? I mean sure I can barely sleep with how loudly they sshh! And moan and quip all night, but there presence is getting bearable and I enjoy when they share moments of heart to hearts with me, teaching me how to do ninja stuff, and when they argue-yes they still argue sometimes, I even join in and yell at them mid fight too! Like now for example.

"Anko! Please stop telling the enemies about my wood release!"

I kick the chin- Woah I can kick that high? Oh right- of the rogue mist genin in front of me and use levitation, which is basically Water walking technique on air and with my full body, and push myself backwords away from his kunai, my levitation uses less chakra than a shunt but is definitely slower.

"Why not Yamato-sensei? I thought you liked her talking dirty?"

Barking a laugh Anko kills the chunin in front of her and responds.

"Come on its hilarious *cough*, Pile drive that scawy ninja with your long hard wood Yamato!"

The blushing Yamato does indeed perform some seals and summon three rectangle pieces of wood out of the ground and drives them into the enemy

"Just stop giving away secrets of Konoha!"

I punch the genin in his chest and bring my other hand down over his head for a skull cracking combo.

Oh. Right, Yamato-sensei has Lord firsts Wood Release! Amazing right? Remembering how I found that out... *shiver*, actually lets forget that one.

---

-16 days of... bonding?-

We made a few detours for the few C-ranks and 2 B-rank upgraded missions but we finally got to the Konoha border and delivered them in.

Oh right we were headed to the Land of wind, or the border we share with it, to do a B-rank protection mission.

Three sand siblings will be joining us on our way back, taking the exam in Konoha, there's the blond with a giant fan, the red-head that looks.. tired? And a puppet user who I am definitely going to bug on our journey.

"Yo! Im Riku"
"Anko"
"Yamato"

"Temari"
"Gaara"
"Kankuro"

We discuss our route and travel plans with them before heading off, we wont be doing the 3 C-ranks a week thing, but we kind of threw that plan away with the upgrade missions, I'm fine with that honestly.

Running through the grassy plains it seems we will be camping just outside of the woods again tonight.

I should read that final scroll and finish the first set of hand signs for my new jutsu, hmm? Maybe ill get a head start on the sealing-summon thing, Anko-sensei knows her way around seals pretty well, ill ask her later, and I could ask Yamato-sensei to help me make my second puppet, now that I know he can, as Anko-sensei says 'handle his wood'.

-6 hours later-

Man I miss cars, my feet ache after running for so long, but a ninja does as he learns. Unfortunately.

I settle my tent and help start the fire, Temari-san is mighty helpful growing the flame.

Gaara seems to be standing still and muttering to himself while kankuro sets up his and his siblings tents.

Yawning I look around and double check I haven't missed anything and go to my tent and pull out [Jutsu creation: Unique storage seals] this scroll unravels to unique seals that can house something as simple as a kunai, and stuff that needs a unique container, like a poisonous gas!

Now I do need Anko-senseis help with this one but I'm pretty sure that I can get that help after the chunin exams and when I should be done with the whole no strings puppet.

I end up reading myself to sleep.