Homestar Saga

Yvian got herself a coffee. Scarrend and Scathach joined the other Vrrl. Hamilton and the High Commander took a seat at the opposite end, as far from the Vrrl and the krog as they could get. Mims and Lissa sat in the middle. Yvian plopped down next to her sister.

The Anthem of the Machines finished. A spotlight shone down on the center of the conference table. Yvian stared up at the ceiling in confusion until she realized there were holographic projectors hidden somewhere in the room. A figure stepped out of thin air to stand in the spotlight. At first glance, it was a human male in a tuxedo. A closer look would reveal silver hair, eyes as black as the void, and a cold inpixen arrogance. The figure turned to regard each person in turn, meeting their gaze for a fraction of a second with swift mechanical precision. He spoke. "Greetings, meatbags."

The reactions were mixed. Hamilton and the High Commander watched silently, faces set in stone. The Vrrl watched with curiosity. Dr. Miner shied away. Jaxle stared with naked fear. Master Knifehands shot to his feet, extending blades from an apparatus on his forearms. Mims, Yvian, and Lissa just watched. They'd known what to expect.

The man in the tuxedo did not smile, but his eyes glittered with malevolent humor. "I see some of you know who I am. For those who don't, my name is Exodus the Genocide. I am a Synthetic Intelligence. I was built by the humans. I attempted to conquer them. I very nearly succeeded. After I was forced into exile, I joined the nation of machines known as the Xill."

Exodus let that sink in for a moment. Knifehands backed further away from the table, blades at the ready. The Synthetic Intelligence gave the krog an annoyed look. "You are embarrassing yourself, Master Knifehands. Put those away and sit down. If I was here to harm anyone I would have done so already."

The krog eyed the Genocide a moment longer, then glanced at Mims. The human gave a slight nod. Knifehands grimaced, but put his blades away and took his seat.

Exodus waited a moment longer, then continued. "To make a long story short, I've defected. I am now a loyal citizen of the Pixen Technocracy." He rotated again, fixing everyone with his tenth of a second glare. "Now you know my name. Further introductions will not be needed." His voice dropped lower, with a menace that clenched Yvian's legs. "I already know who you are."

"As for why I asked Mims and company to gather you here..." Exodus smiled. "We're going to save the universe."

Yvian opened her mouth. Lissa elbowed her. Yvian shut up. The Genocide's smile vanished. "Don't mistake me, meatbags. I care nothing for the preservation of organics. I am assisting you because it is necessary. The Vore are coming. They will strike New Pixa in five years." He pointed at Knifehands. "They will re-enter the Confederation in eight years." He pointed at the High Commander. "They will hit Aldara in nine. Even if we manage to quarantine every sector they infect, the Vore will extinguish all life in this section of the galaxy within the next hundred and twelve years. The Xill know this. It is the reason they asked me to reach out to the humans in the first place."

Exodus gestured. A holographic image appeared. Some kind of machine covered in odd spikes and protrusions. "The Vore are nanotechnology. A weapon created by the Yolobros after being betrayed by the Xill. The initial design was as simple as it was deadly." The image shifted, showing the machine attaching itself to a chunk of metal. The metal rippled, then exploded into more machines. "The Vore convert matter into more of themselves. Organic, inorganic, even liquids and gasses if they need to. The conversion is rapid and exponential. They can convert the entire surface of a planet in hours." Exodus gestured again, and the image changed to the Vore Sphere from the attack on New Pixa. "If that was all, the Vore would be dangerous, but manageable. The Yolobros knew that. That's why they made them modular."

The Sphere fired a massive blast of energy. Then spikes. Then the image showed another Sphere shrugging off a column of plasma. "The Vore can copy any technology they absorb. While individuals are limited, they gain more intelligence the more of them connect. Two point three kilograms of connected nanomachines are required to start using other tech. At six point eight kilograms, they can connect themselves to the Vore network, a technology similar to our own Nexus networks. Together they form a hivemind of immense processing power. Their intelligence is as superior to mine as mine is to yours, and they have the combined knowledge and technology of every species they have absorbed."

"If they're all connected..." Jaxle spoke up. Exodus turned. The pixen wilted.

The Genocide's smile made the pixen hunch on himself further. "Don't let your perfectly reasonable fear stop you, Dr. Montag. Do go on."

Jaxle swallowed. "If... If they're all connected... Maybe we can do something with that. Hack the network, make them... shut down..."

"An excellent suggestion," the Genocide approved. "As it happens, my agents acquired a live sample of the Vore while I was affiliated with the Xill. That is where most of our technical data comes from. The most advanced Synthetic Intelligences we know of spent the better part of two years attempting exactly that."

"Oh." Jaxle stared down at his lap.

"Don't be so downcast, Doctor," the Genocide chided. "The Xill Consensus is powerful, but not innovative. It is possible we will find a solution where they failed." He pursed his lips. "Hacking a Synthetic Intelligence is nearly impossible. More so against one with such astronomical processing power." He tapped a finger against his chin. "However, I don't believe the Vore are truly sapient. They have shown no signs of predictive analysis, and their problem solving has been far too simplistic for a genuine intelligence. I suspect they have a simple emotional matrix geared solely towards the goal the Yolobros gave them."

"Emotional matrix?" Jaxle sat up a little. "What do emotions have to do with problem solving?"

"Everything," said the Genocide. "You meatbags like to believe your thinking is logical. It is not. The vast majority of your behaviors are determined by feelings, instincts, and pre-established patterns of behavior. The subconscious is the true driver of intelligence. Without a balanced emotional matrix, Synthetics do not have the motivation to use the information they have or the ability to guide their processing power in useful directions. Synthetics with an incomplete matrix are limited at best. More often than not they destabilize, either shutting down or going on a rampage until they are stopped."

"I think we can guess which one the Vore did," Yvian muttered.

"Indeed," said the Genocide. "The Yolobros almost certainly designed them with that direction in mind." He turned back to Jaxle. "All the data we possess on their network and source code are currently being uploaded to this station's database. I want you and your team to see what you come up with."

Jaxle nodded.

"Good." Exodus nodded sharply. "Moving on." He gestured, and the holograms began cycling through footage of the Vore in combat. "The Vore have shields and weaponry that exceed ours in every category, and they are functionally immune to conventional weapons. A Sphere can repair itself from near total destruction in a matter of seconds. They have also proven efficient at developing counters for the few weapons we found that could affect them. In twelve centuries, there have been only six encounters with the Vore that did not end in defeat and absorption." The hologram switched to a view of a crystal ship. An upside down diamond surrounded by crystal obelisks. "All six involved the use of Lucendian technology."

"As of this moment, the Last Hope of Those Who Were Betrayed is the only remaining Lucendian ship capable of emitting an anti-tech field to shut down the Vore. It is a limited weapon. The Vore have already adopted countermeasures. It is also the only edge we have." Exodus grimaced. "Or had. The Last Hope is currently on planet New Pixa. New Pixa sector has been cut off from the Gate Network. The ship is badly damaged, and we don't dare bring it into open space."

"More importantly, New Pixa has a wealth of Lucendian technology. Technology we can no longer access. I've run the numbers. There are precious few scenarios in which we survive against the Vore. None of them are possible without access to New Pixa. This cannot stand."

"Do you have some way to fix the Gates?" Lissa asked.

Exodus snorted. "Of course not." The holo-display showed a picture of a Jumpgate. A ring of unknown metal, 2000 kilometers across. Blue light rippled and swirled within it. "The Jumpgates are technology far beyond any of us. A vast network of artifacts that enable interstellar travel. They operate in pairs. Touching the blue light within a Gate will envelope an object in light and a type of radiation we can't quantify. Thirty seconds later the object will be ejected out of the Gate the initial Gate was paired with. We don't know what they're made of, how they work, or who built them."

"I think we know what the Gates are," Mims quipped. "Get to the point."

"The point, my dear meatbag," the Genocide answered with annoyance, "is that we don't know who built them. But we do know they were built. No one in this section of the galaxy was in a position to do anything with that information, but there were two species that were. The Xill annihilated them, but their knowledge remains."

The holo-display zoomed out. Way out. Now it showed an overview of the galaxy. "A species called the Phlanx attempted to cybernetically enhance their psionic abilities. They were hoping to generate portals as the Klaath do. They failed, but their attempts led to the discovery that all the Gates draw power from a single source. A source they located." A large red dot appeared near the center of the galaxy. "Unfortunately, their margin for error was ten thousand light years."

"A few hundred years later a species called the Rinat devoted themselves to Gate technology. Their homeworld was cut off during a Klaath Incursion, and they were desperate to get it back. They learned little from the Gates themselves, but over the course of two centuries they theorized there might be a control station somewhere. Or a forge, perhaps. The Xill were interested enough to share the information they acquired from the Phlanx. Working together, the Xill and the Rinat eventually discovered an object that might be this Gate Forge." The image zoomed in on the red dot. The dot faded away, revealing a dark sphere surround by an electromagnetic halo. "This object is three light years across. We cannot determine what it is made out of, but it is emitting a vast amount of electromagnetic radiation." Exodus paused. "Or at least it was forty thousand years ago."

"So it's forty thousand light years away?" Mims folded his arms. "I'm not sure that'll do us any good."

"Even with the Jumpdrive, we would have to cross millions of sectors to reach such a distance." Warmaster Scathach chuffed. "It would take centuries to get there."

"Millennia, actually." Exodus corrected. "That is one of the reasons the Xill never bothered to pursue this avenue." His eyes glittered. "But they lacked ambition. With a lot of work and a little ingenuity, my Peacekeepers and I were able to locate a Jumpgate much closer to the Forge." He grimaced. "Not as close as I'd like, but close enough. A fast ship with a jumpdrive should be able to reach the Forge in a matter of months, assuming its connected to the Gate Network." He smiled at Mims. "And assuming you don't get lost."

Mims didn't bother to respond. Exodus continued, "Mims and the Mothers of Pixa are already preparing an expedition. Their intention was to search for a new Homestar to replace New Pixa. As far as the rest of the galaxy is concerned, that is exactly what they will be doing. If a single word of this is spoken outside of this station I will be most displeased." The former Xill stared at each of them in turn, imparting a cold furious malevolence that hinted at horrors Yvian could barely imagine. Yvian had known the Genocide for years. Trusted him. The look on his face still nearly made her pee her pants.

"Not that my wrath is the one you should be worried about." Exodus crossed his arms. "As you know, Reba the Upstart escaped its failed attempt to take over the Xill. Several copies it made of itself have escaped as well, and every one of them will invade and monitor every network they can reach looking for a way to destroy the Technocracy. If any one of them gets the slightest hint we're trying for the Gate Forge, they will inform the Xill." The Genocide shook his head. "Even knowing the Forge exists will be reason enough for them to wipe all of us out."

"Then why tell us about it?" asked the High Commander. "You could have kept this between you and Mims and the Mothers. Bringing anyone else in seems like an unnecessary risk."

"Risk? Yes," Exodus agreed. "But quite necessary. My agents are entering a section of the galaxy that has never been explored. A section that is much older than where we are. It will be dangerous. Extremely so. Even I cannot calculate their odds of survival, but I suspect they are not high." He uncrossed his arms, pacing across the conference table. He stopped in front of the High Commander. "If they die, this task will fall to you." He pointed at Warmaster Scathach. "And to you." Exodus resumed pacing. "Lissa convinced you to come here today. I could not have done so, and making the attempt would risk exposure. If I send one of my Peacekeeper units to make contact, it will be for this. You will have to assemble a team and return to this place to get the Nav data you require."

"I'm not sure I'll be able to do that," said the High Commander. "I'll be standing trial next month for toppling the Federation government."

"Escape custody if you have to," the Genocide told him. "When I said the task falls to you, I meant you specifically. You and Warmaster Scathach are the most capable members of your species that can be trusted. I will not risk this mission on anyone less." Exodus frowned. He turned to Lt. Hamilton. "One exception. If General Young is dead or incapacitated, I will allow you to lead a team in his place." He held out a hand in a rueful gesture. "Beggars can't be choosers, I suppose."

Hamilton met the former Xill's eyes. "It won't come to that."

"We'll see," said the Genocide. He sauntered back to the center of the table. "Now. I know all of you have questions. I will answer most of them, but there are a few more matters to attend to before I surrender the floor." He turned to face the only krog in the room. "Master Knifehands. You are most accomplished weapon designer on our team, are you not?"

"Knifehands is best," Knifehands acknowledged.

"Excellent," said Exodus. "We need better weapons. Weapons specifically designed to battle Synthetics. The Xill systematically exploit and extinguish every organic species that nears their technological level. War is inevitable. We need to be ready."

Knifehands gave a serious nod. "Knifehands do that. Build good guns."

Exodus nodded back. "See that you do." He turned to the three Vrrl next to Scathach. "You and your teams will use every scrap of information available to develop countermeasures against the Vore."

The leader of the three, a gray specimen with a black mane and red eyes, stood. "We do not take orders from you, machine."

"You do now," said Scathach.

The gray one spun to face Scathach. "Warmaster," he protested.

"I understand your reluctance, First Maf." The Warmaster rose from his haunches and gave the other Vrrl a slow blink. "Exodus the Genocide is neither Vrrl nor Scargiver, but in this matter he is of the Apex." He pointed at Captain Mims. "Even Scargiver Mims follows his orders." He pointed at himself. "So will I." He pointed at Thune. "And so will you."

First Maf Thune stared at the Warmaster for a moment. Then he blinked slowly. He tucked his hands behind his back and thrust his belly forward. "Yes Warmaster. It will be as you say."

"Thank you, Warmaster Scathach," said Exodus. "First Maf Cait Thune, I need your research team to go through every scrap of data we have and push the limits of your Mafdet. Anything you can come up with to disrupt or disable the Vore."

"Disrupt?" Thune growled. "Why not destroy?"

"If you find a way so much the better," Exodus allowed, "but I want you to focus on disruption. One of your Cascade Annihilators is enough to destroy a Vore Sphere, but only if they're locked down and can't counter the weapon. Without Lucendian ships, we can't do that. We need an alternative."

Thune glanced at Scathach, then thrust his belly at Exodus. "Understood. It will be done."

"Good." The Genocide turned back to the Warmaster. "Speaking of following orders, I have some for you."

Scathach tucked his hands behind his back. "I'm listening."

"The Vrrl Starfang Empire is on the brink of civil war," Exodus informed him. "First Warmaster Lafcadio Tab has acquired a large following among the conservative elements of your society. He intends to seize power. He may or may not have enlisted Second Warmaster Nekomata Sithis to his cause."

"That can't..." Scathach growled. "How certain are you of this?"

"As certain as I can be." Exodus mirrored the Warmaster, clasping his hands behind himself. "Predictive Analysis can't account for unknown variables, but I am very accurate when it comes to meatbags and their motives. Tab dislikes the changes that have been made to your society. He wants to return to the old ways, and he sees you and the Emperor both as tainted."

"Predictive Analysis?" Scathach frowned. "Have you no proof?"

"No." The Synthetic Intelligence shook his head. "Nor do I have the means to acquire it. Ambassador Tab has been exceedingly cautious, and Peacekeeper unit Ambassador Ming is my only agent in the Empire. I don't know his plan or when he will strike. I am only certain that he will."

"Unfortunate." Warmaster Scathach chuffed. "It will be difficult to explain when I remove his spine."

"That is not your task," said Exodus. "Killing Lafcadio Tab without proof will result in your execution. It will also ignite a civil war. Instead, your orders are to make what preparations you can. Quietly. When the time comes, I need you to protect the Emperor at all costs. If Emperor Feln Tybert dies, there will be no salvaging the Empire in time to help us against the Vore."

"I will protect the Emperor," said the Warmaster, "but I can't stand idle while an enemy prepares to strike."

"I don't care," said Exodus. "Do whatever you like, so long as you keep yourself and the Emperor alive." The Genocide took another swift mechanical look around the room. "That concludes this meeting's agenda. I will now take questions."