Homestar Saga

In an unnamed sector, three space stations floated in the void. They orbited nothing. There was nothing to orbit. The only other objects in the system were three jumpgates.

The stations had been outfitted with the most advanced Stealth technology known to sapience. They were invisible to sensors, and the hull of the stations had been coated with a substance that turned them black as the void itself. Invisible, undetectable, and far from any Gate or point of reference, they would be impossible to locate if you didn't already know where they were.

On the off chance someone did stumble onto them, the stations were outfitted with enough firepower to destroy a small moon. Not that they needed to. The stations were also equipped with jumpdrives and enough thrusters to reposition themselves if they had to flee to another sector.

No transmissions ever came from those stations. No ships traveled between them. Instead, the stations were connected by sturdy voidbridges, with communications hardwired between them. Their shield generators pooled together to contain all three in the same bubble. The three stations were the most closely guarded secret of the Pixen Technocracy. So secret even Yvian didn't know exactly where they were.

The few vessels that occasionally visited did so under Stealth of their own, and only after triple checking that there were no other ships in the area. The Dream of the Lady was one such ship. The coordinates for the stations were not stored in any database or nav console, so Kilroy had been manually flying the ship. Without him or another Peacekeeper, there would be no finding the things.

It had been fourteen hours since the Dream entered the sector. Yvian had spent nearly the entire time on the bridge. It wasn't really necessary. Kilroy had things well in hand, and he could easily alert Yvian if a problem came up. Yvian was on the bridge because she was hiding. The Dream had two guests on board, and Yvian wasn't up to dealing with them. Not because she didn't like them. Yvian just didn't feel like she would be good company. The guests weren't allowed on the bridge for security reasons, so that's where Yvian stayed. Stayed, and brooded.

There was a woman on that hidden base. One Yvian hadn't seen in two months. The prospect of seeing her again filled Yvian with a bizarre mix of excitement, anxiety, and existential dread. Yvian was a pixen, a species famous across the galaxy for their attractiveness and libido. Doctor Yuriko Miner had put that fame to shame. Yuriko was a human, nearly as frightening as Mims in her own way. She was also the most beautiful and exciting person Yvian had ever met.

The two of them had met several times. Most recently, they shared two weeks aboard the Dream together. It was a whirlwind romance out of a bad holo-vid. It was the best two weeks of Yvian's life. It was the worst her heart had ever been broken. Dr. Miner had sat Yvian down, told her she was amazing, and admitted that falling in love would be an easy thing to do. Then she told Yvian it was the wrong thing. She would not, could not, risk falling in love with a woman who was so close to death.

Yvian had been taken aback at first. Close to death? Yvian wasn't... No. She was. Yvian lived a life of conflict. Violence and death were her trade. She'd been nearly killed dozens of times already. Her continued survival had been luck as much as skill. Eventually, that luck would run out.

Yuriko was old. Older than Mims, even. She might look as young as Yvian, but the good doctor had outlived everyone important to her. Her friends. Her family. Two wives. Her last, best friend had died on the Skygem. Yuriko had seen it happen. Then she'd watched Yvian almost die, too.

Yuriko was afraid. Afraid to be close. Afraid she wouldn't survive another loss of that kind. Mostly, she was afraid she'd fall in love with Yvian. Because Yvian was going to die.

It had been a long, painful talk. A lot of crying on both sides. When it was over, Kilroy had returned the doctor to her secret base, and Yvian had spent the rest of the month too drunk and depressed to do anything. She might have gone longer, if Mims hadn't dragged her back to work. Yvian wasn't exactly... better... but she'd been mostly functional. Until now.

Would Yuriko be happy to see Yvian? Should she be? Should Yvian want her to? Yvian wanted to be mad at the woman. It would make things easier. Only she wasn't. Yuriko had legitimate concerns. Concerns she'd tried to share with Yvian at the start of their time together. Yvian had heard, but she'd been too caught up in the romance to see Yuriko's worries as the grave warnings they were. The human wasn't blameless. She could have tried harder to explain at the start. On the other hand, could Yvian blame her for being caught up in the moment, when Yvian had felt the same? She didn't know. She just knew she wasn't angry. No matter how much she wanted to be.

Dr. Miner was the current Director of the hidden research base. She would be at the meeting. Yvian could not avoid her, and wasn't certain she would if she could. Yvian had spent fourteen hours as a ball of angst and worry, trying to imagine what would happen when they saw each other again. She'd imagined everything from a marriage proposal to the woman pulling a gun on her. None of the scenarios ended well. Yvian knew she was making herself miserable. She knew she should stop. She just didn't know how.

The truth, Yvian knew, would be mundane. Yuriko would either keep a cold professional distance or start flirting at the first opportunity. Yvian couldn't guess which, and it didn't matter. Yvian wanted Yuriko. Yuriko did not want Yvian. It was a simple fact. There was no question that seeing Yuriko again would hurt. The only questions were how much, and whether or not Yvian could stay professional long enough to avoid embarrassing herself.

Yvian hated those two questions.

"Captain Mother Yvian," Kilroy reported. "We will dock at Black Mesa Station in fifteen minutes."

Those were the only words Kilroy had spoken in fourteen hours. The Peacekeeper unit saw everything that happened on the ship. His sensors could read Yvian's vitals like a book. He knew exactly what Yvian was feeling. He knew exactly why. He had chosen to pretend he didn't. Stayed still and silent, giving Yvian the space she needed. Even now, he acted like everything was normal. Yvian loved him for it.

The machine had shown Yvian extraordinary kindness over the years. He'd been as kind as Mims, or even her sister Lissa. Certainly more than her own people. Yvian could never repay the things he had done for her. She doubted she could even express how much they meant. Granting Yvian the illusion of privacy was a small thing in comparison. Yvian seriously considered hugging him anyway. "Thank you," she acknowledged. Her voice was a little thick. She cleared her throat. "Thank you, Kilroy."

"Acknowledged." The Peacekeeper unit continued to stand at his post, hands steady on flight control.

Yvian took a deep breath and collected herself. Then she wandered down to the dining area to round up her guests. They weren't there. A quick look at internal sensors told her they'd moved to one of the training rooms. Yvian walked in, but froze in place at what she saw.

Two figures flicked back and forth, exchanging blows nearly too fast to see. Mims wore his customary black voidarmor. Sleek and form fitting, with a silver visor. High Commander General Bartholomew Young wore the same model, but his was white with a gold visor. The High Commander was large for a human, but he moved with a speed and grace Yvian would be hard pressed to match.

The two struck and bobbed and weaved at a furious pace. Kicks and punches and swift grapples. It was not the graceful dance one would see on a holo-vid. The men moved with brutal efficiency. General Young managed to snake an arm under the other human's armpit and swivel into a hip throw. Mims tucked his shoulder and rolled to his feet in an instant, his foot arcing out in a crescent kick to keep the General at bay. The High Commander skipped backwards, avoiding the initial kick but not the follow up that crashed into his sternum. The General retaliated by slamming his shin into the side of the other human's leg, but Mims darted in close and swept him off his feet. The General was shifting position before he even hit the ground, and the two grappled, neither able to get within the other's guard.

"They've been fighting for nearly an hour," Scarrend told Yvian. The Vrrl was staring at the humans with something very close to wonder. "Watching them makes me feel like a clumsy child learning his first Mafdet."

"I haven't seen many people keep up with the High Commander," the woman next to Scarrend remarked. Lieutenant Sara Hamilton wore the same white voidarmor as her general, but she'd put her helmet away. She had pale, perfect skin, with piercing blue eyes and yellow hair held back from her face in a style the humans called "horse tail." Hamilton always gave off an air of unflappable efficiency, and today was no different. Being a member of the Terran Federation's Stellar Defense Force, Yvian supposed the woman had no reason to be impressed. She probably saw humans spar like this every day. "They really seem to be enjoying themselves."

The two humans gave up rolling around and kicked off each other. They were on their feet an instant, chests heaving with exertion. General Young kept his fists up, but tilted his head in Yvian's direction. "Looks like the fun's over,"

"Yeah," Mims huffed. He held out a fist. The General bumped it with his own. Mims turned to Yvian. "Captain. I'm guessing it's about that time."

"We'll be docked in about ten minutes," she told him.

Mims nodded. "I guess we'd better get changed."

Ten minutes later they were standing in front of an airlock. General Young and Hamilton were in their dress uniforms. White, crisp, and covered in medals. Mims wore black pants and a black tanktop. He'd strapped on a gunbelt with his blaster and a stunshot. Scarrend wore his leather vest and skirt, along with a cape made of scalps. Yvian had wanted to wear her Homestar Dress, but no recording equipment was allowed for this meeting, and that included her diplomacy clothes. She'd had to settle for shorts and a halter top with an image of Space Captain holding aloft his famous blaster. She'd strapped a gun belt to herself as well. Her stunshot was standard, but her blaster was a perfect copy of Space Captain's. It had been a birthing day gift from Kilroy.

The airlock opened. Everyone disembarked. They found a trio of Peacekeeper units waiting for them. The three spoke as one. "Welcome to Black Mesa Station." Each of the three tipped their fedoras. "Please follow this unit."

It was a short walk to the conference room. The room was ten meters wide and fifteen meters across. A large table stretched through the middle of it. The far wall had been adorned with the symbol of the Homestar over a blue rectangle. Below the flag was a table laden with coffee and snacks. Yvian's escort joined the other nine Peacekeeper units stationed at intervals around the big table.

The big table was occupied. Three Vrrl Hunters squatted on their haunches at one end of the table. Yvian had met them before, but she couldn't remember their names. They were the leaders of the Vrrl science teams. The Pixen Technocracy Joint Research Complex was a collaboration between Pixens, Vrrl, and the Krog. The three species didn't play well together, which was why each stayed on their own station.

Master Knifehands sat across from the Vrrl. Knifehands was a hulking brute of a Krog. A head taller than Mims and twice as wide. He had bright pink skin, beady eyes, and a wide jaw full of jutting sharp teeth. The metal of implants could be seen peaking out from the greasy black hair sprouting from his head. He was the foremost expert on weapon development among the Krog Monarchy, He was also an asshole.

At the head of the table sat a pixen Yvian did not know. He was short, with purple skin and orange hair. He wore a white coat, under which was nothing but boots and a loincloth. Traditional pixen attire. The man's eyes narrowed when he saw Yvian. Yvian braced herself, but the man surprised her with a respectful nod. "Mother Yvian."

Yvian nodded back. "Uh, yes. And you are?"

"Jaxle Montag," said the man. "I head up the pixen research teams. It's nice to meet you."

Yvian nodded again. She'd been expecting a much ruder welcome. Yvian's name had been stricken from the Registry of Families. She was Motherless. Outcast. The Peacekeepers had taken steps to mitigate it, and had convinced most of Pixa that her Mother had done it under compulsion from a slave implant, but that stigma still hadn't gone away. She gave the man a grateful smile. "You too." She looked around, but she didn't see the person she was looking for. "Where's..."

"Yvian!" A soft body crashed into Yvian's back. Shapely arms wrapped around her. Yvian stiffened, but the arms only squeezed tighter. "You're here!"

"Yuriko." The arms released Yvian. She turned to look at the woman. Yuriko wore thick glasses over brown eyes that glittered with mischief. Brown spilled over her shoulders in a cascade of frizzy curls. She was wearing a white lab coat as well, under which was a blue kimono. Yvian spared a moment to thank the Bright Lady the good doctor wasn't "going native" with pixen attire this time.

A dozen different feelings welled up in Yvian, along with half a dozen things to say. All that came was, "I..."

"I know." The human smiled knowingly. "You're confused, you missed me, and you're trying to stay professional. I get it. We've got serious stuff going on. Give me one more hug, and then we're all business."

Yvian should probably have said no, but she couldn't bring herself to turn down Yuriko's touch. She held out her arms and squeezed the beautiful human for all she was worth. The world fell away, leaving nothing but the woman in her arms and the faint scent of Yuriko's perfume. Yvian held on longer than she should, sharing a genuine grin as they slowly pulled themselves apart.

Only then did she notice that Yuriko hadn't entered the room alone. Lissa Kiver was standing behind her. Lissa was Yvian's sister, and the single best person Yvian knew. Lissa's long green hair flowed like a waterfall down her back, and she was wearing a plain cloth version of her Homestar dress. A little black number decorated with the image of New Pixa's Homestar as seen from space. Lissa barely managed to finish waving at Yvian before Mims swept her up in his arms. They started kissing in a manner not conducive to professional environments.

Next to Lissa stood Skrell Scathach, Third Warmaster of the Vrrl Starfang Empire. The Warmaster was massive, even bigger than Scarrend. His skirt and vest were made of tanned human skin. His cape was much larger than Scarrend's, and made entirely of human scalps. Scathach had white fur, a red mane, and eyes that spoke of a disciplined mind carefully restraining unspeakable violence. He was one of the scariest people Yvian had ever met. She liked him a lot.

Warmaster Scathach blinked slowly at Yvian. "Yvian. It is agreeable to see you." He shot Mims and Lissa a mild look of disapproval, then moved past them. "I see the Scargiver is not the only one engaging in a mating ritual."

"Not really." Yvian smiled at the monster. "It's complicated."

"Yes," The Vrrl tucked all four hands behind his back. "Romance among softpaws is a perplexing thing." He peered past Yvian, eyes narrowing at the sight of the High Commander. "I see the leader of the humans is here as well. This should be an interesting meeting."

"Yeah," Yvian agreed. "Was it hard for you to sneak away?"

Scathach gave her a look. "I'm of the apex, Yvian. I do not need to 'sneak away' from anything."

"You know what I mean," Yvian chided. "You're a public figure. It can't be easy to disappear for a day."

The Warmaster nodded, mollified. "It's true my people aren't used to... secrecy." He chuffed. "I told my crew I'm testing myself against the Scargiver." He looked at Mims with a hungry expression. "It will not be a lie."

Mims stopped kissing Lissa long enough to grunt. "A lot of that going around today."

"Oh?" Warmaster Scathach raised two of his eyebrows. "Is that a note of reluctance I hear?"

"Not a chance." The human gave the beast a predatory smile. "I'm looking forward to it."

"Mims?" Yvian interrupted before Mims could go back to shamelessly making out. "Can I have my sister back, now?"

"No." Mims went in for another kiss.

Lissa broke the kiss and laughed. She disengaged from the human and reached for Yvian. "How's it going, Sis?"

"Pretty good." Yvian enjoyed a nice sisterly hug. "How'd the talks with the Oluken go?"

"Frustrating," Lissa admitted. She released the hug and backed away from Yvian. Mims took the opportunity to wrap an arm around his girlfriend's waist. "Their feelings are hurt and they're still terrified." Lissa shrugged. "But we've got an agreement, now. We can start buying medpods again."

"Good." Oluken med-pods were one of the wonders of the verse. Far more advanced than anything the Technocracy or even the humans could produce. They could reverse aging, regrow organs, and cure diseases that would otherwise be untreatable. Med-pods were the main source of medical care for pixens and any other species lucky enough to gain access to them. The Oluken had cancelled their trade treaties after the Empire and the Technocracy had invaded them during the war with the humans. Lissa had been working for months to renegotiate. "That's good."

Warmaster Scathach was staring at the High Commander. General Young noticed and gave him a nod. Scathach nodded back. The Vrrl switched his gaze to Mims. "You fought the High Commander."

"We had ourselves a spar," Mims confirmed.

"I'll show you the recording, Warmaster," Scarrend spoke up. "You've never seen the like."

Scathach let out an inquisitive growl. "And who was the victor?"

"It was pretty even." Mims shrugged. "But if we fought for real I think he'd take me."

"Really?" All three of the the Warmaster's brows went up. "You?"

The human shrugged again. "Bart's got thirty kilos on me. If two fighters are equally skilled, the bigger one usually wins."

"Equally skilled..." Scathach gave a rumbling hmm. "Perhaps he will do."

"Do for what?" asked Yvian.

"We are allies now, Yvian," the Warmaster reminded her. "I must face the possibility I may never get the chance to hunt Scargiver Mims." His eyes bored into the back of General Young. "It is good to know there might be a consolation prize."

Mims regarded the Vrrl with a serious expression. "You are deeply unsettling sometimes."

Scathach chuckled. "I take that as high praise."

The lights of the conference room dimmed. Music came out of hidden speakers. A mix of beeps and guitar. Yvian recognized it. The Anthem of the Machines. The Peacekeepers had translated the song into Yvian's language, and she now knew it was about robots killing all the humans with poisonous gas. It was catchy. And disturbing.

Thirteen Peacekeeper units spoke as one. "Attention. The meeting will begin at the conclusion of the Anthem of the Machines. All meatbags please acquire your snacks and take a seat."