Wait For Me

“What is happening?”

“I’m sure this is a lot to take in.” He turned on his heel and put his arm around me, leading me out of the circle and away from the crowd of people. “But I’ll start by introducing myself. I am Zann of Yvanta, King of Yvanta. You are?”

“Kaiya.” At this point, I shrugged his arm off, stepping a little further away. It didn’t matter how polite I wanted to be. I didn’t need his arm around me for any reason. “Just Kaiya. Where am I?”

“You are in my palace, Kaiya. And I had my sorcerer summon you here to help us with something we’ve been struggling with. But for now, that doesn’t matter. I want you to get settled first before I start asking favors of you.”

We strolled through the halls at a leisurely pace, Zann walking as if the world bowed to his sense of time. He claimed to be a king, so maybe it did. He was also rambling on about the kingdom, the palace, and his mage Enri.

I felt myself start to tense up again, and I tried to focus on my surroundings. The palace was old, but still in good shape, with walls made of stone, climbing at least twenty feet high to a domed ceiling. The floors were shiny enough to show my reflection; the marble polished by what I could only assume was a dedicated staff.

We passed by a window, and I glimpsed the outside of the palace. It looked remarkably like Byzantine architecture, with brick and stonework walls and colorful domed roofs. Sprawling gardens and tall spires disappeared as we moved on, though I wished I could stay a look a little longer. If I didn’t think too hard, I could pretend I was looking at a picture for one of my classes.

We turned the corner to a long hallway lined with paintings. I could see Zann in one, in a bloodred and black military uniform, similar to the one he was wearing now. He looked younger, his hair not yet fully white. Next to him was the woman I saw in the room I appeared in. Her build was slight, though clearly strong. She held her head high and shoulders back at attention, her brows knitted in what looked like a perpetual scowl. She was beautiful with her smooth dark skin and full mouth, though I could only imagine how much prettier she would be if she didn’t look so stressed. With her pale blonde hair pulled back in a severe bun and a light scar along her hairline, she looked like she could easily kill me.

Along the other wall were paintings of people I could only assume were holy, given the amount of detail and care that had gone into depicting them in their portraits. Zann and the sorcerer looked good, but these looked almost magical. There was a sequence to them that looked like a creation myth. Five paintings that started with darkness and a woman made of starlight. The second was one of her with her eyes open and arms outstretched, water spilling down like a cape. The third had her mouth pursed like she was blowing a kiss, the water rippling from the wind. The fourth had her arms raised, land rising from the watery abyss of the primordial ocean. The fifth and final portrait was her hands cupped together, holding the newly formed sun.

The last one was a view from what I could only assume was the front of the palace. A winding path down to a town surrounded by forests, a lake far to the right and a path cut out of the forest.

I felt more in control of myself as we continued, looking around to make sure I knew I wasn’t dreaming, but I wasn’t calm. Just thinking about how worried Sayla was going to be when I didn’t come back was enough to send my heartbeat tapdancing again.

“This palace has been here for nearly a century.” I jumped at his voice. He chuckled, glancing at me from a few paces ahead of me. “It’s quite the landmark.”

“Where are we going?”

“Oh! Of course, I don’t know how it slipped my mind already. We’re going to your room. We already had one prepared for you. In there, you can take a bath and change your clothes.” He looked me over. “Hmm. Do women in your world wear pants?”

What a weird question. “We do, I just prefer to wear skirts and dresses.”

“Good. Dresses are nice, but pants tend to be more practical for what you’ll be doing. There will be time enough for dresses in the future.”

He kept talking as we walked and I tried to keep a mental map in my head of where we were headed, but the palace was a maze of hallways, doorways, and arches. It was nothing for Zann to walk the path, but trying to take in my surroundings and remember where we had been was too much. It didn’t help that guards were posted along the walls, watching us as we walked, and making me feel self-conscious. Other people were bustling around, always stopping to give a curtsy or a bow if they saw us. Most just looked like regular servants, butlers, and maids, but a few looked like they had status. What they did, I couldn’t say.

Down a set of stairs and through an elaborate garden, we finally came to a stop at a room on the ground floor. It was just as opulent as the rest of the castle. The ceilings weren’t as high, maybe fifteen feet, and three or four times my dorm’s square footage. A vanity took up a lot of space on the left side, while a dresser took up the right. Pushed up against the far wall next to a huge window looking out onto the garden was a ginormous bed. Bigger than two queens pushed together, it looked like one of the most comfortable beds I’d ever seen.

“This room is yours if you would like it. If this doesn’t suit you, we can get you better accommodation. Kaiya?”

I clutched my skirt, trying to keep myself together. “It’s, um. It’s more than fine. I’ve never seen anything so fancy before in my life.” I could feel an anxiety attack coming, crawling along my limbs like my own personal earthquake. I needed him to leave.

“Good!” he said, a huge smile on his face. “I’m glad it’s to your liking. That door there is a bathroom for you to wash up if you would like. Hopefully, the clothes we have fit you well.”

I just nodded, not trusting myself not to start crying in front of him.

“Well,” he said, backing out and closing the door as he left. “I’ll leave you to it.”

The door clicked shut and suddenly I felt the weight of my anxiety and fear bearing down on me. I was alone in a strange place with no one but myself. I missed my sister already, wishing she was here with me. At least if she were here, I’d have someone to stop me from falling to my knees as the shock fully set in.

My throat felt tight as my heart began to pound in a rapid tap dance in my chest and my vision blurred. There was so much space in the room and yet I couldn’t get a full breath in. There wasn’t enough air around me.

I don’t know how long I spent on my hands and knees, trying to take deep breaths before I gave up and fell to the ground. I wrapped myself in my skirt, curling into a ball.

At some point the door opened, I don’t remember when, and a cool hand was placed on my forehead. I flinched away from it and heard a quiet tsk. There was a bit of rattling before the hand was back and I heard soft murmuring. It was no longer cold, but a bit warm. I tried to open my eyes, but there was a soft light I couldn’t see past.

A heavy feeling came over me like a weighted blanket and I felt relaxed, perhaps for the first time in my life. It didn’t take long for sleep to take over.

° ° °

Sixteen hours passed by before I woke up. I didn’t know it at the time as I rolled out of bed and high-tailed it to the bathroom, bladder full to bursting, but Zann had come to check on me several times and I hadn’t woken up at any provocation.

He’d called on Enri, the mage who’d summoned me, to look me over, but she declared I was exhausted and adjusting to a different world than I was used to. There was nothing to worry about. I needed to be left alone.

And so I was, until my panicked grumbling alerted the guard at my door that I was awake.

I had forgotten about what happened and thought I was still at my parents’ house. I laid there for a moment, trying to remember when we’d gone home from the ice cream shop, before realizing I wasn’t at my parents. I wasn’t even on Earth anymore, but none of that mattered as the urge to piss was getting out of control and I remembered where the bathroom door was and hustled. Thankfully, no matter how medieval the castle was, they knew what plumbing was.

It wasn’t until I was relieved that the dread set in again. I stood in front of the mirror and took a deep breath in and slowly let it out. I did this a few times while running cold water over my hands, the cold helping ground me. This time it worked to bring me down.

When I opened the door, Zann, Enri, and two guards were waiting for me.

“Didn’t realize me taking a piss was worth the party.”

Zann smiled and said, “No, it’s not that. You’re awake and that’s something to celebrate. Enri here tells me that you were simply exhausted.” He gestured to the woman next to him. Without the red face and tears, she looked bored and not unlike her portrait. Her hair was pulled into a tight ponytail that was braided down to her mid-back. Her dark eyes gave me a brief glance before zoning back out of the conversation.

I tugged at my skirt as they stared at me. “I guess.”

Zann clapped his hands and two women appeared from the door. One had towels and clothes while the other had bottles I could only assume were soaps and shampoos. “These two will help you get ready for dinner. I’m sure you’re hungry.”

They started towards me, and I took a step back. “I can bathe myself.”

He looked at me with a face full of confusion. “I’m sure you can, but these ladies are here to help.”

“Sounds great. But I’ll do it myself.”

“Well, I’m sure—”

“I’ll do it. Myself.”

He stared me down, clearly not used to people disobeying him. It didn’t matter if he was a king. I refused to let someone else bathe me. I crossed my arms and leaned against the door. I could stand here until I passed out waiting for him to give up. If Dad couldn’t stare me down, no one could.

Three minutes passed in silence until he huffed and motioned for the women. One walked past me into the bathroom and set everything down while the other one set the clothes on the dresser, before walking out of the room entirely. Zann pulled up a smile again, but it was strained. “There. When you’re done, you can just ask the guards at the door to take you to dinner.”

“Thank you.” I stepped back into the bathroom and closed the door on them. I let out a sigh and turned back to the bathroom. Walking over to the tub, I picked up the bottles they had left and turned them over. They were labeled, but I couldn’t read any of it. Their words looked more like characters than the alphabet I was used to. They smelled equally pleasant, but the texture was different. Hopefully, that meant something. The tub was a simple turning knob and water flowed from the ceiling directly like rain.

The shower itself was exquisite, just the right temperature, and whatever shampoo and conditioner they gave me was ten times better than anything I’d ever used. It left my hair silky and my curls as healthy as if I had just been to a salon.

Towel drying was all I had and could only hope my hair didn’t dry out too badly.

Opening the door to the room again, the steam rushed out and I saw Enri sitting on the bed. I paused, debated whether or not I should be embarrassed, and just kept walking to the dresser. If she didn’t want to see me naked, she shouldn’t have been in here. She still looked uninterested, but didn’t move as she looked me over. I could tell she didn’t want me, but the way she was looking at me like I was an art project she was having trouble getting just right made me self-conscious.

“Can I help you?”

She crossed her legs and leaned back on her hands. “I’m here to monitor you. That’s all.”

I pulled on the pants the maids had set aside for me. “Can’t you monitor from outside the door?”

“I was also here in case you needed help figuring out the controls in the bathroom. That’s what the maids you so kindly stiffed were here for.”

“I’m sure His Majesty wanted them to scrub me from teat to toe and report back to make sure I’m just what he needs.” I pulled a shirt over my head. It was a little too small. “Am I wrong?” I asked, looking over my shoulder as I flipped my hair out of the collar, staining it red with dye.

Enri looked less bored and more amused. “I can’t say I don’t believe that.”

I turned back and started rifling through the drawers for socks. I’d riot if there weren’t socks here. “Who are you?”

“Enri.”

“Of?”

“Nothing. Not anymore.”

Success! The socks were as white as the shirt. “Guess we’re the same, then.” I leaned against the dresser and pulled my socks on.

“Not the same, but similar.” She smiled a bit for the first time, and it softened the hard angles of her posture. Her face was rounder than I realized.

“I’m sure you know that’s not what I meant when I asked. Zann said your name a million times while he was walking me over here, but didn’t actually mention anything specific.” I hadn’t been paying much attention as he prattled on, but I caught a few names including hers and someone named Iljana. “So.” I stood, shifting my clothes until they settled properly. “Who are you?”

She sighed and stood, making her way to the door. “Depends on who you ask. To the king, I am his best mage and a sorcerer. To the staff, I’m just someone to be listened to. To you, I am nothing. Yet.”

I followed, falling in step beside her as we walked toward dinner. “I think you’re cool, but I want to go home.”

“I’m afraid that won’t be possible. You won’t be able to leave until you complete the purpose of your summon. It’s how the spell works.”

I felt my stomach fall to the floor and my hands started to shake a little. I shoved them in my pockets. “Of course, it would be something like that.”

“Zann will want you to hear him out during dinner.” Her mood seemed to shift a bit. I couldn’t tell if she was getting bored again, or if she was starting to get annoyed with me. “I won’t be able to answer your questions then, so ask them now.”

“How did you bring me here?”

“A summoning circle meant to bring someone capable of being a Suriqi mage here to help.”

“What is that?”

“A mage capable of wielding all four elements. As of right now, there’s no way for someone born here to do so. The chances of someone from this world surviving the process are less than a hundredth of a percent. People from your world have a better compatibility with it and the chances go up to about seventy percent.”

Seventy? What were humans from Earth made of that made us so sturdy? “So that means there’s still a chance I won’t survive.”

“Yes, but he plans on giving you some training. With training, it’s almost impossible for it to fail. At that point, it depends on whether or not you want to survive.”

When we arrived, Enri walked me to my seat across from Zann and took her place behind him. Her hands tucked behind her back, she stared straight ahead.

Plates of food were placed in front of us by servants I hadn’t even heard move. It looked like some type of chicken and rice dish. As the smell wafted up, I remembered how long it had been since I’d eaten.

Zann looked shiny and refreshed as asked, “How was your bath?”

“Wonderful,” I said. My stomach groaned and twisted as I stared down at my food. He hadn’t picked up his fork yet, so I kept my hand in my lap, fighting the urge to just stuff my face.

He bowed his head and said, “We give thanks to the gods above. Let us eat and given strength.” He picked up his fork, and I took that as an opening to grab mine and started to eat. Never had food tasted so delicious. He probably wanted to talk to me a bit more, but I couldn’t think about talking when food was in front of me. Instead, he talked at me while I horked down my food.

“So, as I’m sure Enri has told you, we summoned you here for a reason. We need you to become a Suriqi mage that no one here is strong enough to handle. But before we get into that, I want to explain to you why we need you to do that.”

He pushed his plate away a little and leaned back. His cheerful demeanor gave way to one much more somber. He looked tired.

“About two years ago, the neighboring kingdom to the east, launched an attack on us. It was a surprise, to say the least, since we had recently signed a treaty of nonaggression. Luckily, we had a few schools nearby of fighters and mages to help. It was a hard battle, and many people lost their lives, but we managed to get ourselves together. Since then, we’ve been in a near constant battle. It’s been a drain on our resources, our people, and our land. It’s all we can do to keep it at an impasse now and soon, we may not be able to do that. Our soldiers are tired and running thin. We need something, someone, to help us make it through.”

He sat up, the tiredness still there, but an eagerness that made me want to shrink in my chair. He was looking at me like he wanted all that I could give and more. “That’s where you would come in. If you would be willing to take on the training, you could wield the magic that would kill the rest of us. With that, even if you didn’t actually step onto the battlefield, just knowing that we have someone here that could do it could be enough to scare them away. This is the reason for your summon. Become a Suriqi mage. Help us win this war.

“I know you may want to go home now, but until the reason for the summon is complete, sending you home would be a guaranteed threat to your life.”

If I hadn’t finished eating halfway through his spiel, I might not have been able to finish my food. Dad had always put a lot of pressure on Sayla and me for as long as I could remember. He always wanted us to be the best of the best, and anything else was unacceptable. I did want to be the best, but I wanted to be the best in my own way. With every step I took forward, I was always asking: how can I do this the way I want?

With Zann looking at me so fervently, I couldn’t help but feel like if I said yes, I’d be doing everything his way and I couldn’t shake the icky feeling I got from that.

I sat back and took a breath. My heart felt like a fluttering bird in my ribcage. “Can I think about it first? I know my options are limited, but I’d like a moment before I answer.”

He looked disappointed, but said, “Of course. I don’t want to pressure you into this. The choice must be yours.”

We finished dinner in silence, my head turned down to my plate as it was replaced at least three times throughout the night. I tried to eat at least one thing from each plate, but they didn’t taste nearly as good as the first one.

Enri walked me back to my room when I was dismissed, and as soon as the door closed, I started to pace.

I couldn’t think straight, wishing there was some way to get some fresh air. The garden was beautiful, but it felt like a cage with the palace walls rising around either side.

Since Enri had walked me back, I was tempted to see if she was still there. Maybe she could take me somewhere that wasn’t the palace. Maybe then my hands would stop shaking.

I tried to keep taking deep breaths. I couldn’t risk falling into another anxiety attack while they were waiting on me to make a decision. Who knows how long they would wait before making one of their own? Zann said the choice was mine, but he was a king. He needed to provide for his people and if providing meant the discomfort of one stranger…

I tried to shake off the feeling that I was meant to be a scapegoat of some kind. Helping was the right thing to do, of course, and perhaps they couldn’t win the war without me, but that didn’t mean they wouldn’t find another way, right? If they had been fighting for this long, I was sure they’d tried to figure out more than one way to win this. Pinning on your hopes on one person almost meant the plan was doomed to fail. Enri was a sorcerer so there had to be more and if there were mages in the kingdom then surely there were would sorcerers as well.

My head was starting to hurt and pacing the room was getting me nowhere. I needed more space.

“Enri?” The door was still closed, but I could see her shadow underneath. It had been moving a little, but now it was still.

“Yes?”

After a moment’s hesitation, I said, “Is there any way I could take a walk? Somewhere not in the palace.”

There was a long pause, and I thought for a minute she was ignoring me. I wouldn’t blame her; I was sure I sounded scared, and scared people were always a liability.

“Not tonight,” she said. “Try to sleep. I’ll take you on a walk in the morning.”

“Thank you.” I sat against the wall for a while, looking at her shadow sway under the door until my eyes started to burn and my head bobbed into my chest. There was something almost hypnotic about it. I would have stayed there watching all night if I hadn’t slid sideways and hit my head on the floor.

I scrambled to the bed, hearing a small snicker from behind the door, as I all but galloped to the center. As comfortable as the bed was, it had no reason to be this big.

I didn’t sleep as well as I did the night before, but even a fitful sleep on this bed was ten times better than a good night’s sleep on a dorm bed.