The Mad Rat’s Lab

 

“Attention, please!” I say, clapping my hands. When I’m sure the three kids are paying attention, I continue. “Now that the Green Gang has reunited, except for a few of the support mobs, who knows where they might be, it’s time to take this dungeon invasion seriously. So I’ve decided to take you somewhere no player knows about. Look behind you,” I point at the glass greenhouse.

“W-wow! Is that… a giant warehouse? But it seems there are trees inside, so is it a greenhouse?”

“A greenhouse…? If it’s something new, I can finally show my worth. Let’s go!”

Diq’s reaction is what I expected. He exclaims with surprise and hope, looking at me with glistening eyes. Mhah on the other hand says something that makes me worry. Did he forget all his previous mistakes? I’d usually get angry, but if he thinks he can clear the new mysteries by himself… Umm… he can show off as much as he wants. All he will achieve is to be the first one to die, and I’m fine with it.

As for Krut, he just observes the greenhouse silently with his mouth wide open. Is he surprised, or is he slow? I don’t know…

“B-but, sir Orc. Are you sure? D-didn’t you write in your guide it’s a bad idea to seek what’s new in this dungeon?”

Tsk. Is my plan going to fail before it starts? I must distract him so he forgets about the warnings in my guide. “Of course, Diq. You’re right. Nice job remembering it.” I pat him on the back. “But the guide is for noob players. It doesn’t apply to me or my students, right?”

“Of course! We’re better than any n-n-noob player…”

“Nice!” I lower my voice so that only he can’t hear me. “The truth is, I didn’t plan on going there yet because I was scared you weren’t ready. But since we’re so close and you’re so eager, we might as well go, don’t you agree? It’s a nice chance to improve, and you want to improve, right?”

“Y-yes! I-I want to learn e-everything from you, sir Orc. L-let’s g-g-g-go, to, to, t-to the n-new, a-a-area…” Diq shakes and stammers more than usual.

Heh! He’s afraid, and rightfully so.

“Alright, it’s settled then! Krut, Mhah, you don’t have anything against going to the greenhouse, right?”

“Of course I don’t! I’m itching to go!” Mhah waves his arms around to show me how eager he is. “It’s my time to shine!”

I ignore him and start walking. “Follow me.”

As I expected, the slope that was previously a cliff is now walkable. Thank god I was right. After saying all that, pretending to know what’s going on with that greenhouse, only to miserably fail a few seconds later… The shame would have killed me.

There’s no defined path, but we keep climbing. There are no traps I can see, but rabbits are looking at us with their empty black pupils. Like gazing at the abyss, it gives me the creeps. Unless we attack them, it’s impossible to differentiate between the ones that are critters and the ones that are waiting for us to lower our guard before striking, so we ignore them and continue climbing.

The path goes over the tunnel that connects the two valleys. The layout has been changed and now the tunnel isn’t the only path to go from one side to the other.

I’m not sure this is a good thing, though. Before, it was possible to escape the Not A Rabbit swarm because they were forced to use the tunnel, but now they can go over the mountain, taking a shorter path.

I look below. The rabbits grazing on the grass look like tiny white dots from this distance. On the contrary, as we get closer to the greenhouse, we get to appreciate its immensity.

Isn’t it bigger than the village inside my dungeon? I might have to focus less on dungeon invasions and improve my dungeon a little bit more…

The path is mostly clear. The grass grows in patches, with bare soil and rocks everywhere the grass doesn’t grow. There are a few bushes and a tree here and there. Except for a single rabbit, which I suspect it’s one of the critters that curse you because it didn’t react when we got close, there’s no sign of intelligent life

As we get closer to the greenhouse, a feeling of dread overcomes me. My muscles start twitching like crazy, warning of the incoming danger. But I stop myself from showing any external signs of my worries. I’m the one who decided to use them as testing pawns, I can’t go back now.

Finally, we reach the greenhouse. With the warm sunlight passing through the grass, it looks inviting and peaceful. But I know there’s something hidden behind the dense foliage. Something dreadful nobody knows anything about yet.

Diq speaks my worries aloud. “A-are you sure about t-t-this? Shouldn’t we go b-b-back? I feel danger ahead of us. We can always go back…” He’s more perceptive than the others.

We’re screwed. I don’t know how yet, but I’m sure we’re screwed. Well, they are. I’m sure I’ll be fine as long as I hide behind my students.

“Don’t worry, everything will be fine. Huh, huh, huh!” I lie, acting like the cool and strong leader they expect me to be. “After this, we’ll go and clear the rest of the dungeon. Our prowess will be the talk in the forums for a long time to come. Huh, huh, huh!”

I hope there will be an ‘after this’...

We search for a door to enter the greenhouse, which we find without much trouble. I’m happy there was a door here because I acted as if there was one, my reputation would take a hit otherwise. But at the same time, I really hoped there wouldn’t be one. Now that we’ve found it, there’s no way out of this.

“From now on, I won’t give you any tips even if you ask,” I warn the kids. I don’t know anything about what’s inside, but they don’t need to know this fact. “An important part of your training is to learn how to face the unknown. I hope you learned from my guidance because you’ll need it.”

“A-a-alright. It’ll be f-fine. I can, d-do it…” Diq tries to convince himself, but he’s trembling in fear.

“Sure, bring it on! I’ll show you how good I am.”

I’m starting to suspect that Mhah didn’t come to learn anything but to show how good of a player he is to me. But he didn’t detect the danger like Diq did, so I’ll give him a failing grade.

“I’ll do my best, teacher.” Krut strikes his chest, his face showing a mix of fear and excitement. Talking about grades, he might be my best pupil.

“Then, get ready because here we go…”

I gulp and open the metallic door. Immediately after, the smell of plants and moist soil reaches me.

Sigh… Here goes nothing.

 

---

 

Today has been a great day.

It all started two days ago when the community suddenly exploded. They were talking about a great chance, and how unfair it was that only Savage Horde players could take it… so I had to check it.

The racket was about a message from ImAnOrc, the single player who has repeatedly defeated one of the most recently emerging dungeons without relying on luck or raw stats; without turning crazy like a bunch of other players do. He’s also considered one of the best players in his level range. He was looking for Savage Horde players to go into that dungeon, The Mad Rat’s Lab, and help them improve.

ImAnOrc has been my idol since long ago, so I immediately applied. It turns out he was looking for two frontlines and one rearguard, and since I was the rare goblin mage he was looking for, he instantly accepted me.

I’ve always liked goblins and orcs, and when I started playing the game I immediately chose the Savage Horde faction.

But the game is too realistic and I’m scared of fighting monsters up close, so I chose to play as a ranged Goblin. Then, I swapped to the world-wide famous Goblin Shaman (famous for sometimes blasting themselves instead of the enemy with their spells). It turns out it was the best decision, as I got the chance to play with the player I admire the most.

“Diq, don’t fall behind,” sir Orc warns me. “There are roots and vines everywhere, watch out where you step.”

It isn’t Diq, it’s Miuzcogdiq…

I know, I know. I can’t complain because my full name is long and difficult to pronounce. But I’d love it if sir Orc called me Miuzcogdiq instead of Diq… At the same time, I’m happy he gave me a nickname.

“S-sure! I’ll look where I step and–” Suddenly, something grabs my leg and I fall to the ground. “–uaaah! S-save meeee!”

The rest of my team turns around, ready for battle. But when they see me sprawled on the ground, they furrow their brows and look at me in disbelief.

Why aren’t they helping me? Didn’t a monster just attack me?

Maybe… maybe there’s no monster?

When I look at my feet I realize it’s trapped under a root. “Uh, ah… Ahaha…! And you just warned me… I’m sorry.” I apologize.

“You’re pathetic, Diq. Goblin Shamans have always been useless, but you take it to a whole other level! Hahaha!”

I glare at Mhah, who has been making fun of me since the start of the dungeon invasion. 

“Shut up.” Sir Orc stops our dispute before it can start. Then he hits Mhah on his head. “Don't make unnecessary noise, you fool. Do you want to get every monster’s attention, huh?”

I look at Mhah with a grin on my face. He acts smug and laughs at me, but he’s the one causing the most trouble. I’ve seen sir Orc looking at him with disdain more than once. If I’m lucky, he will kick Mhah from the party after this dungeon invasion and I won’t have to see him ever again.

Krut, on the other hand, doesn’t like to talk unless required. But he’s reliable. I wouldn’t mind if he stayed in the Green Gang for a long time.

I stand up and dust my robe as per custom. I know it makes no sense inside the game, but I feel dirty if I don’t do it.

Everyone starts moving again, with Krut and Mhah in the front, with sir Orc in the middle and I at the rear. Sir Orc said it was required for us to gain experience and Mhah quickly agreed, saying it was an honor to be in the most dangerous position.

In my opinion, he’s wrong. The most dangerous position in any formation, except when it comes to traps, is the rear. Because you can’t look at your back. The rear is the easiest target for ambushes, the most exposed to a sudden attack. But with my two bodyguards protecting my back, I don’t have to fear anything.

Ah, I forgot to thank sir Orc for finding them!

“S-sir Orc, I didn’t say anything before, but… I want to– Auff?” Distracted by my thoughts, I end up crashing into sir Orc’s back when he suddenly stops.

“Stop.” He raises one hand and says to the two in front. “And listen.”

We do as he orders and take a close formation. Surrounded by trees and leaves, it’s hard to see anything from a certain distance. When I pay attention, I can hear the sound of the wind rustling the leaves.

Wait. Wind inside a greenhouse? It shouldn’t be possible…

*Hahaha!*

*Hehehe!*

Like soothing chimes, child-like laughter comes from the right. Then from the back. It comes from one direction before suddenly changing to another, gradually but slowly getting closer. A cold shiver goes down my spine.

I notice that sir Orc is gripping his axe tightly. His arms twitch as he looks around with a grimace. He must be ready to pounce at the first signal of an enemy.

“Is it the Goblimps again…? But the laughter sounds different…” I hear him mutter something, but I can’t understand it.

Then, I see movement and immediately look in that direction. It’s a tiny green humanoid. It makes a surprised face before hiding behind the closest tree trunk.

“A pixie…?”

As if my words were some kind of secret trigger, the surroundings come alive. From all directions, vines and sharp thorns shot out at our group. Vines and roots sprout from the ground, grabbing our legs.

As I do my best to avoid the attacks, I instinctively look at sir Orc, looking for help. I know he said he would leave everything to us, so I don’t expect much, but even a simple hint is better than nothing.

But what I see is him crossing his arms with a relieved look on his face. He plans to do nothing at all.

‘Sir Orc! You aren’t going to help us!?’ I want to shout out, but now isn’t the time for it.

 

“Fear of the unknown is part of the basic human instinct. But you must adapt and learn to overcome it if you want to be a good DMA player.”

- A tip from a veteran DMA player to newer players.