The Impeccable Adventure of the Reluctant Dungeon

Red blades pierced through Baron d’Argent’s clothes, draining small amounts of energy from the dungeon’s body. In turn, the avatar kept spraying the marquis as both of them exchanged blows near the ceiling. The attacks were so fast most people wouldn’t be able to keep up. Theo had cast a dozen more swiftness spells onto his avatar hoping that would grant him an advantage. In truth, it had merely let him catch up to the speed of his opponent.

“Apologies for your attire,” Marquis Leevek said as he kept on puncturing the avatar’s body. “It’s truly a shame to put it to waste.”

“I’m used to it,” the baron replied, dealing another wound to the unfortunate puppet the monocle was wearing.

Thankfully, the blood threads kept the person alive, even if not in the best state. One could therefore assume that the cursed items required living people in order to control them.

Down below, Liandra had caught wind of the situation and was slashing through blood threads like a reaper during harvest. Blessing her two-handed sword, then covering the edge with fire, she swung the weapon around, causing a dozen people to drop to the ground. No longer controlled by the blood spider, they had returned to being normal adventurers… who hadn’t slept for goodness knows how long.

“Focus on the threads, not the people!” she shouted at the trio of junior adventurers, who, despite their best efforts, still remained slightly outmatched.

Freeing another cluster of “guests”, the heroine was about to rush to the trio when Lady Leevek descended from above, blocking her path.

“I won’t let you damage my collection,” she said in a polite but firm fashion. “You have no idea how long it took to select and dress them.”

Readjusting in accordance to the situation, Liandra briefly took a thrusting stance, then charged forward, aiming to pierce her opponent. Before she could, a blood umbrella formed in the hands of the lady and opened, creating an improvised shield.

In nearly all circumstances, such a defense wouldn’t have worked. Even if the umbrella was as strong as steel and hard as diamond, the heroic blade should have pierced through. Liandra had slaughtered far better armored creatures and even managed to cut off the tail of a dragon in the course of her official hero business. Unfortunately, the umbrella proved a lot craftier.

When the blade ripped through, it almost seemed that victory was on the heroine’s side. Yet, just as the blade continued forward, a second umbrella layer opened. It was followed by another and another, opening like flower blossoms, reducing the strength of the thrust until the sword felt stuck, as if Liandra had put it in a bucket of honey.

“Now, now,” the lady behind the umbrella said. “We mustn’t damage you, so be a dear and just surrender, would you? I promise I’ll make you the centerpiece of my collection. At least until a better suited hero shows up.”

Tightening her grip, Liandra attempted to pull the sword out, but the weapon wouldn’t budge. It was completely stuck in the layers of the umbrella, and Lady Leevek was a lot stronger than she appeared.

“I know you won’t take my word for it, but resistance really is pointless. Why struggle when you’d be cared for so well? Life will be one big ball. You’ll be well-fed, admiring the best music, with hundreds of others. I’ll make sure that you wear the very best clothes. From time to time, you’ll even be able to engage in small talk. You are a heroine, after all.”

Liandra gritted her teeth. Being encased in ice once was enough for a lifetime. No matter the cost, she had no intention of becoming a trophy ever again.

“Holy light!” she shouted, concentrating all her energy forward.

The glow surrounding the sword became incandescent, causing even the flames to disappear. Raw divine energy surrounded the weapon, bursting forward. The outer layers of the umbrella instantly curdled, falling to the ground like scabs. The rest, along with Lady Leevek, were thrust through the ballroom into the wall.

Sporadic strands of blood emerged in an attempt to cushion the blow. The first few dozen snapped, achieving nothing. The subsequent hundred, though, managed to achieve their purpose. Like the umbrella layers, they reduced the speed, slowing the lady down more and more until she came to a complete stop.

A shocked expression emerged on the woman’s face. Slowly, she turned around to find that she was less than a foot from the wall itself. Had the strength of the blow been only slightly greater, she would have slammed into it, which was absolutely unladylike.

“I never was one for dancing,” Liandra said, slashing the air to get all remaining drops of blood off her weapon. “And by the looks of it, neither are you.” She rushed forward, blade still glowing, cutting the thread of every person on the way.

A new umbrella appeared in the hand of Lady Leevek as she, too, flew forward straight towards the heroine.

“I say, the ladies seem to be having a splendid time,” Marquis Leevek said.

At this point, the man had semi-transformed into a mummy. Blood threads covered more of his body than not. Meanwhile, the avatar appeared virtually unharmed. The state of his clothes, though, was an entirely different matter.

Ignoring the speed, the fight between the two was considerably more monotonous than one might think. Both sides had quickly found that all attempts at defense or trickery were pointless and had instead focused on stabbing each other with increasing ferocity. There was no telling what reserves of strength or energy the other had, but either side was convinced that theirs was greater.

Theo found the whole thing ridiculous, but he would be damned if he quit before the marquis. Even with the constant energy drain, he had enough to spare. On the other hand, even if he won, he wouldn’t be victorious. The golden monocle was his real enemy. Once its puppet was rendered motionless—or “killed”, as some would put it—it would simply jump on to someone else. Even with the blood spider injured and the rest of Theo’s group catching on, there were plenty of puppets remaining, and that was only in the ballroom. There was no telling how many more were scattered throughout the rest of the estate.

In times such as these, one had to rely on cunning as much as strength. And when nothing cunning came to mind, the dungeon decided to resort to common pettiness.

While the marquis kept on stabbing him in the chest, the avatar didn’t respond in kind. He still reached forward with his right hand, but instead of an ice spell, something completely different was cast.

Suddenly, the monocle flew off the face of the unfortunate adventurer, flying straight into Theo’s hand.

“What in blazes?!” the marquis’ voice asked, yet it wasn’t the marquis.

The person who had been fighting suddenly went numb, dropping to the floor. Naturally, the avatar cast another telekinesis to catch him, then gently put him down.

“This is scandalous!” the monocle continued.

If Theo had been human, he’d be subjected to tremendous pain inflicted to his hand. As an avatar, though, the only thing he noticed was that the energy drain was merely one-tenth of what he experienced during the stabbing match.

The golden rimmed piece of glass was spinning wildly as if trying to cut its way through the avatar’s fingers, yet achieving nothing.

“Release me this instant!” it demanded. “I won’t stand for this outrage!”

“Good work, Baron!” Ulf shouted across the ballroom. “You found his weakness!”

When it came down to it, the comment was absolutely true. Deep inside, the dungeon didn’t want to admit that the entire fight could have been avoided if he had done that the moment he had discovered the true nature of the monocle. If nothing else, he’d have saved a certain amount of energy, not to mention another set of clothes.

“That’s the least an adventurer should be able to do,” Theo said. “Next time—”

The avatar abruptly stopped as a multitude of masks flew off the people below, causing them to drop to the ground. Uncertain what was going on, Theo used a spell to encase the monocle in a block of ice, then he cast an indestructible aether sphere around him.

Masks kept on flying, causing more and more people to collapse like puppets whose strings had been cut. Within seconds, the only people left standing were Avid, Amellia, and Ulf, as well as Liandra who remained engaged with Lady Leevek.

On the surface, it appeared that the group had won and Theo’s action had single-handedly brought the battle to an end. Unfortunately, that was far from the case. As Spok had warned him, he wasn’t fighting mere monsters, but abomination “children.” And whenever a child got in trouble, the family pet was certain to respond.

All threads of blood moved about, gathering in one single spot. The blood cockroaches that had been scattered all over the ceiling moved together, combining into an entirely new creature. This specimen was simultaneously a spider and not. More specifically, the millions of red insects formed one giant glistening spider with twelve sets of legs, sixteen eyes, and a massive jaw that could crust an armored rhinoceros in one snap.

Having forcefully learned a bit of etiquette through his existence in Rosewind, Theo knew that what was expected now was an exchange of pleasantries before the inevitable combat to the death. The blood spider, on the other hand, knew nothing and instantly struck him with four legs.

Tips as large as a knight’s lance, yet sharp as a pin, hit the impenetrable aether sphere. Incapable of breaking the avatar’s defense, the force sent the sphere—and the Baron with it—bouncing off the walls, like a billiards ball.

“Seems you struck out, old boy,” the monocle said, gleefully. “No one can defeat him when he gets like this. Your only chance is to release me and hope I manage to calm him down in time.”

The suggestion was as appealing as a griffin banquet. The marquis was right about one thing—the creature was quite large and aggressive. However, that only meant that it would provide a lot more core points.

Waiting for the aether sphere to dissolve, Theo concentrated. His plan involved a four-stage attack that required a not insubstantial amount of energy. As long as it proved successful, though, there was every chance that he’d gain a vast amount of experience and, very likely, the equivalent of a demon core.

The sphere bounced off yet another wall, continuing to the side of the spider. That was ideal. From this angle, a large part of the creature’s underbelly was exposed.

A split second later, the aether bubble popped.

Theo put his plan in motion. Dozens of fireballs appeared in the space in front of him. They were quickly wrapped in small aether spheres, then shoved off forward with telekinesis. Ice shards followed immediately after. The tip of each was blessed so as to do maximum damage.

Back in his main body, Theo saw the spirit guide’s frown deepen. All that would have been irrelevant if he had taken one simple concept into consideration: the universal principle of inertia.

While the spells were masterfully executed, and held the destructive power to destroy red demons, the avatar’s aim left a lot to be desired.

Curving to the left and towards the floor, they completely missed the spider, flying in a direction that Theo hadn’t at all planned on them going. Moments later, a blood freezing scream filled the chamber.

Time seemed to freeze, as everyone—blood spider included—looked in the direction of the scream.

“It’s…” Lady Leevek said, barely capable of speech. “It’s completely ruined!”

The once massive umbrella she was holding now was nothing more than a mass of smoldering shreds. Beyond that, ice shards had pierced through the red protective layer of the woman’s dress, pinning her to the wall itself. The blessed tips must have an additional effect, for the lady’s puppet was incapable of movement.

“Someone, do something!” The ruby ring continued in the lady’s voice. “I can’t move her anymore. Darling, please—”

Taking the opportunity, Liandra snatched the ring off the woman’s finger. Without mercy or hesitation, the heroine then took a small pouch, placed the ring inside, then tightened the pouch in one single action. A faint golden glow surrounded the pouch while the muffled voice of Lady Leevek continued uttering complaints.

“A little warning would have been nice.” Liandra turned towards the avatar with a serious expression. “Great plan, though.” She winked.

“Umm, yes. It’s not that I doubted you’d win,” Theo lied. “I just thought that all of us should join forces to deal with that thing.”

Having both of the “children” captured had caused the blood spider to completely freeze still. Its eyes moved wildly, switching from the baron to the heroine. Both held someone who the creature was created to protect, and both didn’t seem the least bit concerned.

Confusion made it split in two, then merge again, as it couldn’t decide on its main priority. Charging to rescue both Leeveks simultaneously was the proper thing to do, yet that risked failure. The new “guests” of the estate had proved to be a lot stronger than anticipated. It would be wise to keep its strength and take them on one at a time. Alas, that also wasn’t an option, for both Leeveks were of equal importance and the spider couldn’t be seen to have any preference. The baron was definitely closer, but he was also the strongest of all enemies. The heroine was by far an easier opponent, but heading her direction risked allowing the baron to attack from behind.

The endless feedback loop seemed to have created the perfect opportunity for the group to come up with a combined plan. Since Theo wasn’t particularly good at these things, he was relying on Liandra to start shouting orders to the trio, allowing him to get an idea of what was best.

A loud screech quickly put an end to that. Avid’s griffin soared around the spider, then clawed out two of the creature’s eyes. Only a cat would be so vengeful and thoughtless. Sadly, griffins were precisely cats with wings.

“You three, get behind me!” Liandra ordered, holding the double sword in front of her.

Amelia, Avid, and Ulf dashed in her direction. So did the spider. The moderate amount of pain had sprung it into action. Going after the bird was possible, yet a far more convenient target were the three weakling adventurers. Afterwards, the monster could deal with the remaining two, one by one.

“Idiots,” the avatar grumbled as he flew straight down.

All twelve legs of the spider’s underbelly extended forward as it propelled itself, eager to impale as many people as it could. Lady Leevek was no longer in condition to do anything about it, so it no longer had to keep the puppets alive.

A dozen feet away, a wall extended from the floor, blocking its path.

Too fast to stop, the creature slammed into the hard surface, piercing several sections with its legs.

“Stuck, are you?” Baron d’Argent asked, as he used mass telekinesis to slide the unconscious people towards the sides of the ballroom. “Then, get stuck some more!”

His left hand still in contact with the floor, he created another massive wall, then slammed it into the first. Normally, such an action would be followed by a splash of blood. For whatever reason, this wasn’t the case. Both walls remained where they were, tightly placed against one another. Not a drop of blood had been squirted out, not to mention the dungeon hadn’t gotten any indication that he had killed the creature. For all intents and purposes, it was actually stuck there.

“Quickly!” Liandra grabbed Amelia and Avid with one hand, sprinting towards the edge of the wall. Ulf followed a short distance behind, running on his own accord. “Theo, find an exit!”

“An exit?” the avatar asked, confused.

For one thing, there was no exit other than the one they had entered from. A quick glance in the direction revealed that it had transformed into a solid wall of blood red bricks.

Furthermore, there was no reason for them to be retreating. So far, they held every advantage. The spider was pinned down within a wall and alone. Surely the group’s combined strength was enough to kill it.

“Theo!” Liandra shouted again.

“Err, there is no exit,” he said, the first thing that came to mind.

“Then make one! We can kill the spider or save everyone in the ballroom. Not both!”

A deep sigh swept through Rosewind, as the dungeon knew exactly what she was asking from him. If they were to continue to fight here, the creature would indiscriminately kill and maim all the unfortunate thieves and adventurers trapped in the cursed estate. The only way to prevent that from happening was to get it to chase them to a more secluded area of the castle where the fight could resume.

“You’d better not be taking my kill,” the avatar grumbled and created a large square opening onto the floor.

Originally, Theo had aimed to create just an empty room from where he’d tunnel onwards, creating more rooms thanks to his dungeon abilities. The last thing he expected to find was that a series of rooms already existed below. Dark, dreadful, and unwelcoming, they appeared to be remnants of the estate’s initial layout, now literally left to rot.

Anything not stone had long been reduced to ash and rust spread throughout the floor. From this distance, there was no way to tell whether anything was cursed, but given everything else in this place, it was a safe bet.

Without a word, Theo cast aether bubbles around everyone—including, against his better judgment, the griffin—then propelled them into the gloomy corridor below.

Once that was done, the avatar caused a single tower to shoot out from the floor, striking the wall right where the spider was supposed to be stuck. He had made special attention to keep the tower hollow, in order to see the results. That proved to be a mistake.

Crimson beads trickled down the inside of the tower, pouring onto the floor. From a distance, this almost seemed like blood splashing, yet that wasn’t entirely the case. Each droplet happened to be a creature and, just as they had detached from the original blood spider’s form, they were now slowly reforming it on the other end.

Careful not to harm any of the unconscious guests, the avatar threw a fireball within the hollow tower. A lot of sizzling and screeching followed, but there was still no message of the creature’s death.

“Spok,” he said back into his main body. “Fire is enough to kill a pet, right?”

“Of course.” The spirit guide nodded. “As long as you create a massive inferno that melts it completely.”

The manner in which she said it already told the dungeon that he had messed up. He didn’t know why or what the consequences would be, but he was fairly certain that he shouldn’t have cast that last fireball.

“Sir.” Spok adjusted her glasses, like a schoolteacher catching a student cheating. “You set something on fire, didn’t you?”

“Of course not!” Theo snapped, rustling some furniture in the process. “Who do you take me for?”

“Are you being honest, sir?”

The dungeon didn’t answer.

“That’s a relief, then. Powerful blood spiders have the ability to absorb abilities. What doesn’t kill them makes them stronger. If you had, for example, set part of it on fire without killing it, it would have adapted, becoming a—”

There was no reason for her to continue. By the time the spirit guide started her explanation, the sound of crackling had died down. A new trickle had emerged from the hollow tower—a trickle of flames. Each of them was its own separate entity that merged together once again. Reluctantly, the avatar cast an arcane identify.

FLAME-BLOOD SPIDER (abomination’s minion)

A creature created entirely out of blood and flaming passion, capable of cursing targets and boiling the blood within them.

The spider uses fine strands of liquid flame to create a massive web with which it burns its targets.

“—burning spider,” Spok finished without a note of pity. “Should you happen upon one, purely theoretically, of course, your best course of action would be to run and erect as many walls between it and you as possible. If nothing else, the creature is easily bored and likely to focus on targets that aren’t giving it a hard time.”

The avatar looked about the ballroom. Hundreds of people were stacked near the walls, moved there thanks to his telekinesis. If he were to jump down and close the entrance behind him, everyone would be consumed, after which the spider would likely burn through the floor and chase after him. Under such circumstances, there was only one thing left to do.

“Rosewind has really been bad for my health,” the avatar puttered, then sent a series of blessed shards of glass, taking out another of the spider’s eyes.

The flames turned crimson, as the monster focused its attention on the Baron, just in time to see him rush down a corridor in the floor below. Without an ounce of hesitation, the spider of flame—now closer in appearance to a burning centipede—leaped down after him.