Surviving the Scaly Slow Life

Chapter 30: Kids These Days



Back to the present~

 

"So, who wants to explain?" [Corinna]

 

Having rushed back home after her mama senses tingled away, the mother dragon salvaged the situation as best she could. She learned from her mistakes 20,000 years ago, though, so the damage dealt by the exploding child was almost nonexistent. 

There was just a bit of emotional damage inflicted upon the other children after the little dragon blew up. Their minds were slightly scarred, and they were still feeling a bit of recoil. But on the bright side, the living room alongside all the furniture was perfectly fine aside from a layer of sparkly dust that covered everything.

Yes. Everything. Be it the couch, the walls, the exploded child, nothing within line of sight of the blast was spared. Even the fireplace was affected and started emitting a rainbow flame. 

Sadly, the show was put to an end when the mother dragon reversed all physical happenings in the room. The tiny dragon took retaliation in the form of aggressive cuddling. She's quite attached to her mother's tail, you see.

 

"Well?" [Corinna]

 

The big children, on the other hand, were subjected to a small interrogation. Nothing serious. Just a slightly tired Mama wondering what happened to the big kids that constantly wanted to babysit. 

All they had to do was explain exactly what happened and she would return the hot chocolate they made. If they didn't, then they would have to make another batch for the parents but with extra whipped cream and marshmallows.1Good thing they don't have blood sugar to worry about. I can feel my liver ceasing to exist just writing this. 

Silence returned to the room as the peanut gallery continued watching their beloved show of Children vs. Mama Dragon. Sadly, their snack supply had run out for the night, but at least they could continue their spa session. Each and every one of the parents, wolf included, were dressed in the freshest and fuzziest of bathrobes. The three mothers opted for facial masks that definitely do not look horrifying in dark lighting while the papa dragon chose a mud mask and the papa woof settled for cucumber slices on his eyes. 

How very relaxing.2Just a reminder that papa dragon takes the shape of a walking dragon, and papa woof is a woof. Have fun with your imaginations, smiley. 

The same could not be said for the big children as they were shivering in their very timbers. Actually, no. They weren't. Only the three biggest children: the twins and their floofy childhood friend, were on edge. The remaining two children were occupied with keeping the hot chocolate away from the baby dragon that got tired of nuzzling the mama dragon and tried to reach with all her might for the sweet treat.

Eventually, the other tiny children recovered from their tail-shock, and with the lure of a warm, delicious drink, joined the baby dragon in the quest to free the hot chocolate from the hands of the nefarious sister dragons. 

The biggest children could only wish they could join the grand battle instead of-oh to heck with it all, that's not the important part! Focus on the little ones!!

...

Baby dragon uses Tail Chomp!

She missed!

Foxy boi uses Floofy Tail!

Sister dragons are immune to the floof!3That's impossible!

Woof pup uses Run-Really-Fast!

She misses and faceplants the sofa!

Fire birdie uses Fireball...wait, don't do that inside the house!!

...

Sadly, the quest failed, and the small children were unable to free the hot chocolate from the sister dragons. But on the bright side, the boiling hot pot cooled off during all that AND the tiny ones had some entertainment for almost ten minutes. 

As a reward for their grand efforts, they get some hot chocolate before bath time. The fireplace was also re-kindled, bringing back the warm, cozy atmosphere. 

Bath time came around right after the tiny ones finished their tiny cups of hot chocolate, leaving behind the parents and sister dragons to enjoy the rest. 

Incidentally, the mother dragon dragged the twin dragons back to the palace where their punishment for the night was cuddling with the mama. The sister fox shared a similar condition where she was forced to assume her foxy form and snuggle with her foxy mama. 

 

.....

 

Water is wet.

Or perhaps, it is not.

While the answer may vary from person to person, it does not change the fact that the bath was steaming hot and ready for enjoyment. 

A fishy maid washed the baby dragon. A goated maid washed the baby birdie while her partner, the jacked-gal of a maid, fetched some more towels. On the other hand, the woof pup and foxy boi did not bring any maids with them, so they were forced to wash themselves. 

At least, that was the plan until two doggos of the formerly-three-headed-doggo trio4A reminder that they are named 'Madeleine, Beignet, and Tarte', and the two doggos present are Beignet and Tarte. barged in with lots of scrubby gear. One doggo for each floofy child. 

Nothing but the sound of the tiny children becoming squeaky clean after an entire day of playing filled the room. Well, and the lovely ambience of hot, steamy water.

A few minutes of scrubbing and dubbing left all the little ones nice and shiny, perfect for the bath. One by one they plopped themselves into the cozy water, and one by one they slowly fell asleep.

It's a good thing they had adult supervision, otherwise they might have stayed in the bath forever! That wouldn't have been very fun, would it? Just imagine the size of the nonexistent utility bills. What a nightmare that would have been!

Instead of sleeping in the bath, the little tiny children were dried off, cooled off, dressed in their pajamas, and moved back to the baby dragon's bedroom where they would sleep on the comfy bed. They must have been quite tuckered out to stay asleep the entire journey. 

Now shush! The little ones need their beauty sleep~. 

 


 

Lucillia

 

...Zzzzzzzzz...

...zZzzzzzzz...

...zzZzzzzzz...

...zzzZzzzzz...

...zzzzZzzzz...

...zzzzzZzzz-MY TAIL!!

 

"WAKE UP ALREADY!! The sun's gonna blow up soon and it'll take forever for a new one to show up!" [Aurelya]

"Ugghhhh, five more minutesss..." [Lucillia]

"NO! NO MORE MINUTES!1exclamationmark" [Aurelya]

"Ugghhh, five more secondddddssss..." [Lucillia]

 

LEMME SLEEP.

 

~~~~~

1

2

3

4

5

Hello, World!

~~~~~

 

Oki, I'm good. 

 

"FWAAAHHH~. Goooooood mornin' everybody~." [Lucillia]

"..." [Aurelya]

 

Why the long face? And what happened to everyone else? You're telling me that I went through allll the trouble of saying good morning to them, and everyone just disappears?! 

Rude! Ungrateful! Inconsiderate! Uh...I ran out of words. Well either way, it's really mean of them to do that and my feelings are hurt and my disappointment is immeasurable and my day is ruined. Hmph!

But it's okay. I, the kind and generous dragon that I am, forgive them! Mwahaha, praise me more! MOARR!!

 

"Uh...so are you gonna get up or not?" [Aurelya]

"Nope." [Lucillia]

 

Goodnight.

zzzzzzZzz~

zzz-

 

*yoink*

 

HEY! THAT'S REALLY MEAN! GIMME MY FOXIE BACK RIGHT NOW, OR ELSE!!

 

"If you want it, come and get it~." [Aurelya]

"Grrr. Get back here!" [Lucillia]

 

No one takes away my Foxie and gets away with it! Not even Mama when she gives me hugs!

 

"Catch me if you can~." [Aurelya]

"*angy dragon noises*" [Lucillia]

 

I'll...I'll get you one day! Just you wait until these doors stop getting in my way!

Huff, seriously though. Puff. Why. Huff. Are. Puff, these handles so tall?! You're telling me Mama didn't make every single door in the house me-sized?! UNACCEPTABLE!! I demand to speak with the manager of this place right this instant!

Just, uh, lemme get my foxie back first!

 

"Whoooaaa, are you chasing each other?! You're chasing each other, aren't you?! I wanna join, too! AkiAkiAkihurryandjoinustoooooo!!!" [Fenny]

"No." [Akira]

"Awwwww...ohwellhavefunthenwe'regonnagochaseeachothernowokaybyeeeee!!!" [Fenny]

 

Kwahaha! I have acquired an ally! I was hoping to get another one, but I guess I failed the charisma check that time. Meh. Anyways, onwards my fuzzy compatriot! We have a really hot birdie to catch!

And it's really important that we get her before she hides behind an adult! Everyone knows adults can't be moved!

 

*boink!*

 

Ow, my nose!

 

"Milady, if you wish to run around the house, I recommend changing out of your pajamas first." [Mira]

 

Gahh! An adult! Run for your lives!

 

*zoomies-*

 

Wait a minute. That wasn't just any adult. That was Mira. She's my adult. Mine! That means she'll listen to me, right? Right?!

Let's investigate!

 

*zoomies but in reverse*

 

"Mira!" [Lucillia]

"Yes, milady?" [Mira]

"Get her!" [Lucillia]

"Get who, milady?" [Mira]

"The birdie!" [Lucillia]

"And why must I do that?" [Mira]

"She took my thingie!" [Lucillia]

"Can you specify which 'thingie' Lady Aurelya took? It is important to identify the correct target." [Mira]

"Uhhh...uhhhhh..." [Lucillia]

 

Hrmm, it's not like I can just say that it's my foxie. What if she's listening?! We can't give away our plans out loud. That'd be silly!

I need a...uhhh...a codename! Or...codeword? Meh, too much thinking! I need to hurry before the birdie gets away!

 

"My fluffy thingie!" [Lucillia]

"The 'fluffy thingie'? Which 'fluffy thingie' are you referring to?" [Mira]

"THE fluffy thingie! The fluffy thingie with the fluffy fluffies!!" [Lucillia]

"Uhuh...." [Mira]

"*om nom nom* She means the one that looks like Nee-san. *nomma nomma nom* Breakfast is ready by the way." [Akira]

"Hey! Share with the class!" [Lucillia]

"No. *nom* You can get your own. *nom* Fenny's there already." [Akira]

 

Well, I guess you can't fight on an empty stomach...to the dining room we go!

 

"Ahem." [Mira]

"Wat?" [Lucillia]

"You are still in your pajamas, milady. " [Mira]

"So?" [Lucillia]

"If you wish to run around the house, you must wear your running clothes. Let's go back to your room so you can get changed." [Mira]

"..." [Lucillia]

 

I know what this is. It's a scam, isn't it?! All this time I thought Mira was my adult, MINE. She even said it herself...

But it turns out...IT WAS ALL A LIEEEE?!!! SHE WASN'T MY ADULT AFTER ALLLL?!!?

Haah....haaah....guhhh...

I-I-If I can't have her tail...THEN NO ONE CAN!!

 

*CHO-*

 

"Milady, I would not advise doing that. I am not like your sisters or mother. If you were to do such a thing, then I would no longer have a tail." [Mira]

"Exactly." [Lucillia]

"..." [Mira]

"...*nom*..." [Akira]

 

Hm? What's so hard to understand? I thought I was pretty clear if you ask me. I want what I want when I want it and if I can't have it, then-HEY! PUT ME DOWN RIGHT NOW!

I didn't even finish my line of thought yeeeeet!!

 

.....

 

Fumu. I think it is safe to say that I have gathered enough observation data through...observations. Now, I can safely conclude that running around in clothes meant for running around in is a lot more comfy than running around in clothes meant for sleeping. But, BUT, sleeping in clothes meant for sleeping in is more comfy than sleeping in clothes meant for running around in. 

Yup. I am a genie-I mean genius. Ya know what that means?

It means that I, Lucillia the Dragon, will come up with the most perfect of all perfect plans to take back what's mine from the hands of the evil birdie!

 

"Gimme foxie." [Lucillia]

"No." [Aurelya]

"Gimme gimme gimme." [Lucillia]

"Not until you start waking up on your own!" [Aurelya]

"...never mind, you can keep it." [Lucillia]

"Eh?" [Aurelya]

 

Heh~.

 

"SIIIIIKKEEE!!!markoftheexclamations" [Lucillia]

 

*yoink*

 

Hehe~, eheheheheh~, gets 'em every time. 

 

"Get back here!" [Aurelya]

"Nevahhhh!!" [Lucillia]

"HEY!" [Solestia]

 

Uh oh. 

 

"No playing until you finish your food!" [Solestia]

"Sir yes ma'am!" [Lucillia]

 

*nomming intensifies!*

 


 

It was a beautiful morning, a wonderful one even. The ever-diligent workers of the house prepared themselves for another day of excellent work. So too did the older children of the estate rise from their slumbers to enjoy the morning. And the mistress of the house? 

All in all, 'twas an ordinary day in the house of dragons and co. And that certainly includes the herd of children running to and fro like there was no tomorrow. 

At least, that would normally have been the case. But the events that would transpire after the number of tiny children multiplied from one to four cannot be put into words, though some Historian Dragons would later refer to that day as...

The Nommening.

 

.....

 

It all started when the young ones finished their most important meal of the day. 

With their energy banks nice and charged, they wasted no time resuming their previous campaign. 

The children loaded their checkpoint in the dining room and immediately entered the next level, but not before loading up on snacks for the day. However, the path ahead was blocked by a mysterious-looking question mark, so there was no indication where the path ahead might lead. 

But days don't get any shorter, nor do dungeons clear themselves, so the brave adventurers pressed on in search of mouth-watering food loot and evil sisters demons to smite! 

The door creaked open as the woofie rogue sniffed around for any traps, lest a poor party member falls victim to it. Fortunately, there were none to be found at the entrance, so the others shuffled in. 

A scaly and taily tank stepped through the door with a feathery warrior close behind and a floofy healer to bring up the rear.

'Twas still early in the campaign, so the party chose not to set up camp and ventured forth into depths of the unknown!

Their first encounter was series of unidentified, leafy-green objects. Contained in cylindrical ceramic objects, the mysterious entities posed no immediate threat to the young party. 

However!

The party of youngsters were far from naïve, for they have borne witness to the most devious of contraptions countless times. Nothing could possibly fool their all-seeing eyes! 

They formed up, ready to strike. By catching the unsuspecting foes off-guard, they could earn a stealth damage bonus of over 200%! A perfect start to their adventure!

And so the woofie rogue pranced forth with an emergency bucket on hand should things go awry.  She got closer and closer to the target and was moments away from delivering the fateful strike. But all of a sudden, she slipped, failing the impromptu Agility check. And the cause of her little tumble? A really waxy leaf!

Dozens of such leaves were scattered around the floor, encircling the party and disconnecting their path to the exit. The unidentified, leafy-green objects turned out to be a bunch of hungry plants. Like anything else, plants aren't themselves when they're hungry. 

With such dire straits all around, there was only one possible thing that could be said.

 

"IT'S A TRAP!!" [Lucillia]

 

Indeed. 

The young ones immediately took action: the healer casted his buffs, the rogue recovered and retreated to her comrades, the warrior apparently knew magic and began casting a fireball, and the tank...ate a cookie? 

Both sides were but mere moments from clashing before another entity popped up in front of them.

 

"HEY! Stop it right now!" [Silvania]

 

Gasp! The Dungeon Master herself made an appearance! How exciting! Well, exciting for anyone except the party of tiny creatures and their vivaciously vegetative adversaries. On the other hand, the now free-to-fly fireball was eager to embrace its newfound freedom in the wooden room full of plants. 

 

"No fireballs in the building!" [Silvania]

 

A flick of her tail was all that was needed to bonk the fireball out of existence, truly a feat only the Dungeon Master could achieve. The children, awestruck by her magnificence, gracefully exited the room as a sign of their profound respect and definitely not because she shoved a basket of their favorite fruits into their hands.

The day for that campaign's end would have to come at a later date.

In the meantime, younglings decided to take a much needed snack break after working so hard in that dungeon. 'Tis not an easy job after all~.

They decided to relocate to the outside world for the rest of the day, and after finding a conveniently-sized log next to a conveniently-placed firepit, they set up camp. Gathered around an imaginary fire, the little ones ommed and nommed their snacks and sipped some juice while enjoying the cool autumn day.5So, it's been quite a while since I last worked on this series, but uh, have I ever actually specified what time of year it is? If not, then it is officially fall/autumn.  

With daylight so bright and the sky so clear, the young'uns opted to extend their break and enjoy the scenery instead of setting up camp. That, and because it was lunch time. 

A party of grown-ups soon brought the party of youngsters back inside for a delicious meal. They then yoinked some more delicious snacks from the free-food providers before resuming their important task of touching grass.

Now that their hunger bars were replenished and their reserves for the next few hours minutes were stocked, it was finally time to make themselves at home by making themselves a home. A quick game of tail, claws, wings was done to divvy up the tasks. 

The feathery warrior and the woofie rogue would search for firewood while the floofy healer and the taily tank would assemble a shelter.

Water?

Who needs that? Everyone knows that Splash doesn't do any damage.

Anywho, the wooden wanderers wasted no time in gathering plenty of nice and dry wood. Likewise, the homely housemakers found enough rocks to make a half-decent foundation and enough dead leaves to perform a leap of faith. They even discovered a conveniently located path of clay that was free for the taking. 

What a perfect sequence of events!

The little adventurers just have to build the perfect fire as well as the perfect house, and they'll have created the perfect camp! 

Splendid!

But first, they have to enjoy their afternoon nap. 

Shhh~

 

 

 

It's alive! For those of you who saw the previous notice (that has been taken down), the imposter on Kindle was turned to dust a while ago now, but nevertheless! Thank you all for your support, especially those that offered your assistance. It may not have been needed, but I really appreciated it! And thank you, everyone, for being the dragon enjoyers that you are. You may all take not just one but two cookies from the cookie jar. Now that you all know that I am alive, I shall return to death until the next chapter. Stay safe, take care, and continue enjoying the dragons. 

 

https://discord.gg/EjacVNmFRs <-- bleh.

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