Soulforged Dungeoneer

When I came out from the nook where the hidden quest giver had been, Mel's group was fighting the Beautiful Businesswoman Harpsichord Harpy again, and I let them have it, going back to grinding as though nothing had happened. After the... fucking distressing Slave Dungeoneer Quest thing, it was even more difficult to slip into my Telekinesis trance, but the exercise of doing that also helped to clear my head, so I guess fair is fair.

I let Mel's group set the timing for the rest of the floor, and after doing a bit more grinding just to calm down, I spent some time thinking about how best to spend my Class Points. I'd entered as Level 30 with a little over a hundred class points to spend, and I was now about to hit 34. The class point accrual rate seemed erratic--it usually went up as I leveled, but I could swear sometimes it didn't--but I didn't expect to get above 200 points unless I kept saving, and for right now, I wanted to consider my options instead. I'd likely hit 150 with this next level, which gave me a level one and a two to play with, but that was it for now.

Purchasing class features was expensive, but as a self-made class it was basically a wish fulfillment fantasy, constrained by the flavor and tags of my class, my points total, and probably the mood of the administrator or whomever. That was kind of the point of having a brand new class, really; I asked and they gave me something that didn't exist. But, what kind of wish did I ask for that would make me sufficiently overpowered to hunt a player killer? That's the point at which most people would ask for stat boosts, but I'd always felt odd about them, and they definitely felt like a waste of class points, compared to wish fulfillment. But was that bias wrong? I considered it as I watched Louise healing the shield tank, who was holding off a Hungry Horde as the others focused down the sub-boss.

If the point of the system was really letting us change things, then marginal increases in stats meant nothing, except keeping you alive long enough to get more, right? But at the same time, declaring that I didn't need them to stay alive was arrogance, just as depending on them was cowardice. If you took them when you didn't need them, you'd never know what else you could be spending your points on. But if you didn't take them when you needed them, then that was it. You stumble on the road of life and end up in the ditch.

There was also the obvious point that at some point, marginal increases were just... big increases, if you kept at it. Strength beyond strength, intelligence beyond intelligence... at least, in principle, right? I had no way to measure the strength of the monsters I'd met at the International Dungeoneers' Association, much less the thousand-plus levels that were the highest humanity had achieved so far. If those people had hundreds of times my strength, that was reality-breaking in its own way, right? Compared to spending ten thousand points on a tier five class feature, were my priorities in the right place? I didn't want to even do the math on how many attribute points I could get for that much, and how much that would have knock-on effects for the rest of my abilities. Meanwhile, that one tier four ability of remaking items... in what way was that balanced, except perhaps to keep it out of easy reach for people in general?

I put that out of mind with some difficulty. I focused on my class point pool and offered a couple vague suggestions into the cosmos, which was the general method to 'wish' for new features. Mostly, now that I was sure Skill Sage wouldn't upgrade manifested items and enhancements, I wanted something that would--though admittedly I still didn't know how Skill Sage actually worked, since none of my base Soulforged features were skills, it definitely wouldn't help.

As tended to happen when I was asking for something new, there was a period of "grinding" that felt for all the world watching a slow computer with one of those swirly-doo waiting patterns on the screen, except mentally and with no visual component. After a long moment, longer than it should have taken, a notification popped up that I'd seen a couple times, notably when I first requested the class:

[ YOUR REQUEST WILL BE REVIEWED ]

In short, no quick answers. My mind drifted to the Fairy Crystal in my inventory. That was definitely on my short list of things to do as soon as possible, but it would involve a day and a half of concentrating on the absorption with no interruptions. Ideally... I grimaced. Also on that short list were telling Mel's group, the military, and anyone else who needed to know about the specific dangers of the dungeon, but, well, if I left with that in my inventory it would definitely be assessed for tax reasons if nothing else. It'd... probably be better to absorb it before leaving, though I had no idea if it was going to be a thing. The other things hadn't been, after all.

In any event, most likely, the plan was either to pressure Mel's group into ditching with me, or wait until we got to the Docks, whichever the hell biome that was, and do it then. I'd like the opportunity to get the extra levels, but I didn't want a chance that any of us were going to overshoot. While maybe--maybe--we could take this Slave Dungeoneer as a party, I wouldn't feel good about it unless I had a plan that involved at least another one or two overpowered individuals, and while I didn't know any offhand, I had to assume the Association would be able to point me to some. In the meantime, assuming anyone would listen to my intel... and assuming they wouldn't charge off and try to do it themselves...

I sighed. "God, I hope they don't do that." I glanced around, checking for any enemies that had appeared out of thin air, as they did on occasion. Usually, not close to anyone diving the dungeon, but as open as the floor was, it was hard to know how close they could spawn. Nothing was close, but there was another promising group to grind. "I could understand the logic, though. Maybe that's why the quest says it will resolve even if I fail?" Even then, my inner monologue countered, they might just want to handle it all themselves.

That thought was more than enough to put me in a foul mood, but I was at a point where my ability stressed me out more than the enemies, so at least I could work out my frustration with some exercise.

Anyway, Mel's group eventually went for the Dungeon Boss, and me not having swung by to say anything, they seemed to think I needed space, or maybe that I was still in my skill focus zone, which wasn't wrong. Whatever, I wasn't ready to talk just then anyway, especially not with a challenge ahead. I honestly had expected that Louise would insist on joining me on my solo rush of the boss, but their whole group seemed to take it for granted that she was coming along with them, probably for safety. Like the room around the previous exit, the wall and floors were invisible from outside, but they were clearly there, because they all seemed to step with renewed confidence, and Jenna's light spell no longer made the floor by her light up, so she dismissed it.

The boss was revealed to be a Hurricane Harpy, but like the rest of the Harpies, there was more to the name than that. No, this was the Busty Brass Band Hurricane Harpy, and she had a big honking pair of Tubas for wings and a whole assortment of smaller brass pipes on her back. When the tornado surrounding it broke for the big reveal and to signal the start of the fight, three more harpies appeared out of nowhere, each with a brass instrument in their claws or magically held in front of them. Immediately, the Hurricane was again concealed within an intense windstorm, and together with her three adds--or perhaps sub-bosses--they started playing a jazz or swing rendition of "Never Gonna Give You Up" that swept across the entire level.

"Your sense of humor is... awful, Administrator," I said quietly. "I hope you appreciate that." And somehow, I got the impression that yes, she did.

The three sub bosses had different instruments and patterns. A Trumpet Harpy took the high notes and launched a constant stream of sonic attacks, but only during its part. A French Horn Harpy (who, just to add to the unnecessary cringe factor, yes also had a beret) had some kind of constant zone field around her that I assumed was a status effect projector of some kind, and the last was a Trombone Harpy whose every toot of her horn produced a force blast that both washed over the room and also knocked her back. She... didn't seem like much of a threat, instead bounding around almost at random whenever she started playing, which was fairly often.

As far as I could tell from outside, there was some kind of hazard at the edge of the room; I couldn't see it, but they advanced well into the room and Louise kept throwing glances at the walls or floor or something dangerous out there. Mel's group immediately focused down the french horn player, using ranged attacks as much as possible, while the shield tank kept them safe from the Trumpet. When the Horn was defeated, they stopped and waited, and after a moment, the Hurricane Harpy's tornado walls dropped, giving the group a chance to dive in for some damage.

I nodded as I watched. This was clearly meant to be a puzzle boss; take out the sub bosses to get a chance to harm the main body. A classic pattern.

They retreated early, well before the tornado came in again, which told me they were either scared of direct damage from the wind wall, or scared of being blown into a pit or spikes or something along the edges. At this point, the Hurricane started playing her tuba as well, her deep toots shaking the room and making some kind of ground-based attack attack that I couldn't see, because the floor was still invisible from outside the room.

The group's next victim was the Trumpet Harpy, most likely because the Trombone was jetting around during its parts and difficult to hit. Given that they had a shield tank, the Trumpet was trivial for them, and a few moments after her defeat, the Hurricane was vulnerable again, and they piled on.

The last phase, instead of requiring the defeat of the Trombone, exposed the Hurricane Harpy but added three tornadoes rotating slowly around her. Those provided enough wind to make ranged attacks tricky, and forced melee to back out regularly, but it was doable if you kept your head on your shoulders.

While at that point I didn't feel particularly threatened, I was chagrined to see that a slight miscalculation from Mel herself had her caught in one of the tornadoes and thrown across the room. I didn't see exactly what happened, since it was on the other side of the room from me, but she came back with bad wounds, which Louise was able to patch up.

All told, I didn't see anything in the boss that I couldn't have won against blind, but by the time the Hurricane Harpy fell dead, I'd at least gotten a good read on the boss's patterns. Usually a second pass was easier, and this... depending on how it went, it could be pretty easy or pretty tough.

The doors unlocked about five minutes after a boss fight, which was something you could toggle from within if you wanted to challenge again, but Mel and them let the doors open, and I walked in. It was easy to waste five minutes with some healing, some minor debriefing, loot gathering, and other miscellany, so it's not like they were waiting around for me, but when I walked in, Mel offered a friendly wave, and Louise smiled and walked up to me.

I took the time, of course, to get a good look at the inside. It was more awful than I'd expected. The hazard at the edge of the walls turned out to be rows and rows of shelves with eggs on them, and a layer of crawling Harpy Birdmen that were all claws and beaks, with dead eyes, moving around in a purposeless haze. Since I'd not seen them from outside, they had to act as nothing but an environmental hazard, but that was a creepy way of doing it.

"So what do you think?" asked Mel, with maybe a little bitter tint to her voice. "How'd we do?"

"I mean, it looked fine to me," I said, my eyes searching the walls of eggs for anything out of the ordinary instead of engaging with her. "I have questions, but I might as well give it a shot or two on my own first."

"Or two?" Mel deadpanned in return. "You sure do assume you'll succeed, solo."

My eyes finally located an empty spot in the wall with a broken eggshell and no Harpy Birdmen. I glanced around to check, but it kind of looked like it was the only one. Was that a reference to the fallen birdman? If so, was there a secret? "Well if you want to stick around and watch I certainly am not going to argue, as long as you don't interfere."

"Actually, yeah," said Will, the archer, out of nowhere. "I'd like to see a solo diver do a boss run. Honestly most of the time you were fighting you were too far gone for us to see more than vaguely, but it looked like a hell of a thing. And if you get your ass handed to you, we'll rescue your overambitious ass."

I met his eyes, which I could only do since he was a ways away and probably couldn't tell, and laughed well-naturedly in return. In truth, the Quest was hanging over my head and I really wanted to tell them about it, but I... I also wanted to... not do that yet. I felt like, once again, that was a revelation that was going to change their attitude towards me, and maybe not for the better, and all I really wanted was to have a little while longer in which things seemed... normal.

Normal for me, anyway.

I catapulted myself over to that little nook and, although I could swear there was nothing there, after blinking a couple times there was suddenly a detached harp, covered with dried blood, tucked into a corner of the little cubby. I picked it up, and the item window was more baffling than anything I'd seen since the Devil's Garbage-ass Trash Sword:

HARPY BIRDMAN'S LEGACY

A testament to the cruelty of the Harpy race. See? You can do stupid puns, too.

"Are you seriously... reading my mind?" I whispered the question aloud, even though--if I was right--she and the other Administrator had pulled names at least out of my head that I had never spoken aloud, but shook it off, trying to force myself out of the headspace where I was expecting a response. Still, I paused, and after taking the item, whispered one more thing, just to make sure we were on the same page. "I'm really hoping this makes for a secret boss fight, honestly. That one looked a little tame."

I got a feeling in response that was either a sudden onset of gas, or the administrator trying to convey something that I could not begin to understand, since I wasn't actually telepathic. If the former, it didn't last long. If the latter, it was probably anger or something equally unpleasant, given the nasty feeling of it.

Anyway, my maybe-suicidal impulses satisfied for the moment, I hopped down, glancing at the respawn counter, and then at the group. "When the time comes, you shouldn't stay in here," I offered. "I'm definitely going to do something stupid."

The others of the group kind of exchanged glances, and Mel put both hands to her head as though suddenly beset by a migraine. "How stupid are we talking?"

"Hopefully, the dumbest."

Jenna, for reasons that I didn't put a lot of thought into, tilted her head back and let out a gutteral, frustrated growl of rage into the sky.