Is This a Novel or Something?…Everyone and Their Dog is Regressing, It’s Fking Ridiculous

Chapter 42



‘?????????????????????’

[You there?…]

‘?????????????????????’

[You there! Why are you broken!?]

‘?????????????????????’

My mind was mercilessly filled with endless hook-pings without any cooldown.

Yet, I could not understand the current situation at all.

‘Husband? Husband? Husband?’

I was sure I saw him for the first time today.

But suddenly, calling him Husband?

‘Why? Who is it? Why? Who is it? Why? Who is it?’

[…Already gone too far.]

At that moment, a mirror fragment from Elcia caught my eye.

It seemed Elcia must have regressed looking at a specific future.

‘When she regressed from the future, was I her boyfriend or husband?’

[I think so too. Otherwise, such words wouldn’t come out.]

The choice was determined.

I started to focus on the mirror fragment to see the regression Elcia experienced.

Like it or not, to know the reason.

As before, the light from the mirror seeped out, then faded, and my vision gradually returned.

As soon as my vision was restored, I quickly chose to fast forward.

‘There’s a time limit, so I should quickly watch the highlights and skip!’

[I, too, find it hard to watch a full match.]

The videos in front of me suddenly vanished.

Instead, what began to rise were videos of a specific point in time.

Soon, as the video began to play, the first thing that caught my eye was the appearance of ‘me’ and Elcia in a dark room.

‘I’ looked slightly more mature than now, and Elcia maintained her appearance but had much longer hair than now.

There, ‘I’ was beneath Elcia, and

Elcia was on top of ‘me,’ overlapping our bodies.

Without realizing it, I cheered.

What is a relationship? Of course, it’s about dense, steamy times!

In the future, I had become an alpha male intertwined with an elf!

‘Oh, right. F*ck. This novel is rated for all ages.’

[When did you start caring about that? More importantly, go a bit further. Can’t you see well enough?]

Elcia, who was energetically gyrating on top of ‘me.’

It was a classic ‘giseungwi’ position.

I observed Elcia moving.

What first caught my eye was the expression on Elcia’s face, who was on top of ‘me.’

She looked blissful and bashful, covering her cheeks with both hands.

She looked incredibly happy.

As Elcia moved, her massive chest swayed in tandem with her movements.

However, her bucking waist was not stopping; on the contrary, it was speeding up.

In that moment, the surrounding red lights blinked as if the time was almost up.

‘Hey! F*ck! This is just the introduction!!!!!’

[Indeed!! You can’t interrupt this!!!]

‘I’ll watch this all! Even if I exhaust all my energy!!’

[Good thinking! For the first time, we are on the same page!!]

From this viewpoint, the two lovers seemed to be engaging in ‘serious baby-making thrusting.’

Elcia, expressing joy with her whole body as if this moment was heaven.

Elcia’s joyful gasps grew louder.

Every now and then, I’d hear her voice whispering, “I love you.”

Elcia’s intense gaze showed a will to not let go, even as she panted heavily.

If I exclude just two minor things, it was similar to an average adult video.

One was that ‘my’ limbs were bound to the bed.

The other was that both ‘my’ eyes and mouth were gagged, two very minor details.

[My dear? I didn’t think you had such tastes when I saw through Hitomi.]

‘Just say I saw through my eyes (Hitomi). It sounds odd anyway. But it seems to be Elcia’s preference.’

[That makes sense. Well, it’s not an incomprehensible taste.]

‘If they’re lovers or married, that’s completely possible with mutual consent.’

That was quite fine.

At least it wasn’t a dangerous interest like ‘fainting play.’

[Right. Seeing that, it’s clear that elf would call you Husband.]

‘Well, it’s making me excited, so I’ll keep watching. Wow, those breasts are insane!’

[Hyeji would definitely hate this. For now, let’s keep watching.]

Before long, the climax of the two lovers’ elation arrived.

The ‘me’ underneath and Elcia on top were trembling against each other.

A brief moment of afterglow followed the climax.

Soon, Elcia began to regain her composure, reaching to remove ‘my’ blindfold and gag.

‘So, I’m now in a relationship with an elf.’

[I’m curious, too. Even if you’re mixed-blood, aren’t you a high elf? Congratulations in advance.]

I was watching the scene with satisfaction.

At the same time, curiosity bloomed deep inside me.

What would happen when I returned to the original point of consciousness?

Then, I suddenly looked around.

Contrarily, the room looked too desolate compared to the hot moments.

There was nothing on the walls.

Only a bed and a desk.

It looked worse than a dormitory.

[There’s nothing in the room.]

‘Whether now or in the future, I’m living a bleak life…’

In that moment of reflection,

‘…Huh? Wait a minute.’

[What’s wrong?]

‘Crap.’

The weak sense of discomfort I felt at first began to snowball rapidly.

The growing unease morphed into a warning that swept over my whole body.

At that moment, the voice in my head seemed to think similarly.

‘There are… no windows??’

[…There’s nothing to tell the time.]

‘No wonder I couldn’t pinpoint when it was…’

The surroundings were already wildly flashing red.

As if the time limit had long expired.

To me, that red flashing felt like a warning against the excitement rising inside.

Danger.

At that moment, Elcia’s voice began to resonate.

“Husband, this is your fault. You seduced me with that naughty body while ignoring me every time.”

“Ugh!!!”

“I had to resort to such violent means since you wouldn’t look at me.”

Just then, Elcia entirely removed ‘my’ blindfold and gag.

Elcia smiled sweetly at the bound ‘me.’

“Finally, I can see my husband’s face.”

“Ha… ha…”

“Do you think this counts as rape?”

Then, the bound ‘me’ began to ponder with labored breaths.

After a moment of contemplation, ‘my’ answer slipped out.

“No, this is lovemaking.”

‘Yeah, just like me. That’s the right answer.’

[My dear? Are you out of your mind?]

At that, Elcia clapped her hands and beamed.

However, her face seemed strangely ominous.

“That’s great! Then it’s mutual consent, so now we can—”

In that moment, the surroundings turned entirely crimson.

And my consciousness began to sink.

*

Back to the original point.

While the colorless world gradually regained hues one by one,

the voice in my head began to echo again.

[My dear? What was that nonsense earlier? You were being raped, right?]

‘Think about it. Suddenly, ‘I’ was bound and squeezed in an unknown place, right?’

[…From what I see, it seems you had no intention at all.]

Of course, it could be that I had no intention.

But this is not rape.

‘However, the moment I took off the blindfold, I saw an incredibly beautiful elf.’

[…And?]

The voice in my head, still puzzled, didn’t grasp it yet.

To clarify that doubt, I proudly stated.

‘From that moment on, this is pure love, not rape!’

[Shut up!!! Don’t insult pure love!!!!!!!!!]

‘Argh!!!! My head hurts!!!!’

As my head rang with loud screams, the colors of the world had fully returned.

As the world started to move slowly, I also tried to open my mouth.

No, I was going to.

If not for the overwhelming fatigue rushing in all at once.

Surely, I was paying the price for seeing the future longer than expected.

It even felt like I was suffering severe anemia, as my head began to spin.

But more than anything, the most painful was

my left eye, which felt like it was going to burst.

[My dear? Are you alright? You seem to be in a serious condition.]

‘F*ck, why is the interest so high? This must be worse than Rush and Cash.’

[So, are you regretting it?]

‘I have not a single regret in my life!’

There was no regret.

But my body was completely wrecked.

I couldn’t even lift my arms, and the creeping fatigue prevented me from holding up my head.

However, to Elcia, who was holding my hand, it seemed to mean something else.

Suddenly, Elcia blushed as if embarrassed.

She had pulled her hand from mine and brought it to her face with delight.

“It seems you were feeling shy. Don’t worry, husband. I’ll take good care of you.”

Then the classroom began to stir.

Simultaneously, many uncomfortable gazes turned towards me.

“Why is only that guy happy? Why is only that guy happy?”

“F*ck! No one even looks at me, this is unfair!!!”

“…Let’s think carefully about your looks.”

“I also want to flirt with the girls! Install Momo Talk for me!!”

“You should install a hypnosis app.”

“What hypnosis app, you dog!!!!”

Voices of jealousy and anger melded together.

Amidst that, someone delivered a sharp observation.

“Hey, wait a minute. Is that guy trying to eliminate the opponent to elect his wife?”

“Isn’t this a violation of election law!!”

The classroom was turning into chaos in real-time.

Elcia silently raised her hand without saying a word.

Only then did the commotion gradually begin to settle down.

After the classroom was entirely quiet,

Elcia finally opened her mouth.

“You might be surprised, but we actually met for the first time today.”

“Then why did you say Husband?”

Someone in the back asked with a very aggrieved voice.

It seemed they had feelings for Elcia.

“That’s just because—”

She paused for a moment, trying to meet my gaze.

When I painfully lifted my head, Elcia looked into my eyes briefly before turning her eyes back to the entire classroom.

“From the moment I saw you, I was certain that you were my husband.”

Along with that, Elcia grabbed my hand again with both hands and pulled me forward as if drawn by her ample breasts.

It felt as if there’s such a thing as universal gravitation.

No wonder, before I could even think, my hand was naturally pulled toward her huge bosom.

Of course, that attempt was.

Squeak!!!

A failure.

Due to someone.

“Don’t bid higher!!!! You f*cking chest monster!!!!!!!!!!”

Hyeji, who had been frozen just moments ago, shouted as she slapped Elcia’s hand away.

Before I knew it, a black number had appeared above my head.



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