Here, Have a Cookie a Pokemon Fanfiction

May’s POV

“Ow,” Wayne muttered as he leaned back from the lowering arch. “You know, for as fun as the damn brochure made cave diving sound, they failed to mention how piss ass dark it’d be.”

“Language,” Jasmine said. “Not the cave’s fault you’re huge, just stop walking ahead of Sergei's light.”

May sighed before looking at the phone forlornly. So much for text time with Lea while they were pushing down. She glanced up towards the ceiling as a few Zubat spread their wings and dived.

They froze in midair before being slammed into the wall, a faint blue glow enveloping their skin.

“I thought controlling living creatures was difficult?” May winced as the small creatures slowly slid down the wall and glanced towards Gawain.

'Ah, you would be quite correct, your grace, but I’m quite a bit more adept than I used to be. A few bats are a trifling matter for a knight such as I.’ Gawain puffed up his chest as he finished.

“Since when was I a ‘your grace’?” May asked.

Wally reached out and thwacked Gawain on the back of the head before he could answer. “Translation, he’s got a bit more oomph since he evolved, and the bats are like half a pound and poison type. Don’t get a big head and focus. Us getting jumped down here would suck.”

Nimue nodded sagely from her perch on top of Wally’s head.

‘Forgive me, my lord. I forgot myself.’ Gawain bowed before turning to look forward.

Sergei pinged twice with message notifications, and May jogged forward to glance at his screen, taking care to duck under a set of stalactites.

She frowned once she saw it was just a few emotes posted by her phone. “Sergei...”

“Oi, don’t get mad at me because you miss your girlfriend. I like to talk too, ya know.” A gif of a small little muppet creature attacking the camera with a rubber spatula popped up on screen immediately after Sergei’s message, with the caption of ‘May your woes be many, and your days few.’

‘Don’t put that evil on us while we’re going through this pit. I can and will light you on fire, I don’t care if it won’t hurt you.’ Suzy leaned forward and pointed her claw at the floating phone.

May sighed. “It’s a meme gif, Suzaku. Calm down.”

Suzy winced at the full name before nodding and falling in step next to her trainer.

“I still can’t believe your phone doesn’t have a text to speech option built into it.” Jasmine leaned over and gingerly grabbed the phone out of the air. “Last gen Poryphones had text to speech, and it’s not like he doesn’t have a speaker.”

May shrugged. “Sergei can’t find the setting and online options are... not ideal.”

The Kazam Translate incident was not something she wanted to go through again. Thank you very much.

Jasmine stayed silent as she thumbed through menus and setting options, before brightening. “Ah ha! And that would be why Sergei couldn’t find the settings. What’s your password?”

“What? Password?” May tilted her head before jogging up next to Jasmine and looking at Sergei’s screen.

A sign-in prompt had popped up, attached to a file called administrator functions.

“Jasmine, I don’t have a password. I don’t even have an account for whatever the hell this is.” May leaned back, taking a step away from the two before frowning. “Never really saw the need for extra security with Sergei at the helm.”

“Maybe your dad set it up then?” Wally suggested, his voice raspy. “Huh, the air’s a bit worse down here. Surprising.”

A small, orange mouth popped up out of the ground. ‘Alright?’

Wally waved his hand in front of him. “I’m fine, Samie. My uncle built this, I could probably push through a burning building and be fine.”

May shot him a worried look before sighing and looking down towards Samie. “Any subterranean threats we should be aware of, Samie?”

Samie shook his jaw. ‘No. Is odd. Normally many fellow diggers. Today, empty.’ Samie looked down towards the ground and sighed. ‘Ground is cold.’

May winced before leaning down and scooping the little guy up. “I’ll keep you warm for a bit. Sorry, I wasn’t thinking about that.” She glanced back towards Sergei and Jasmine. “I suppose I can call dad and ask later. Still seems kind of odd, though.”

Messenger opened back up, and a text popped up. “What exactly are you all looking at, anyway? I don’t see anything on my screen.”

“I don’t think you would, hon. They’re system files for core programs. They probably didn’t want you tampering with something by accident.” Jasmine scrolled down and a list of functions popped up. “Apparently there’s a program in here that ejects you from the phone, if this list is accurate at all.”

A big red X lit up Sergei's screen. “Nooooo thank you. I’m quite content to vibe, thank you very much. I’ve seen the kind of crap these morons get up to. Let me stay in the warm confines of my case.”

Wally rubbed his arms together. “Can I join you? It’s fucking cold in here.”

May stiffened at the complaint before tracing her eyes up and down the walls. "May, there aren’t ice monsters down here, calm down.” Wayne grinned at her. “And if there was, Skarm could take em.”

“Yeah, I love Lea, but clairvoyance is kind of out there as far as abilities go, and it’s nowhere cold enough that the cave is going to freeze over.” Jasmine let go of Sergei and let him resume his position of lead. “Back to the phone, the text to speech option is locked behind that sign-in. I’m guessing they didn’t want to give a ghost the power to turn his voice on and off.”

“I can understand why.” May leaned back in surprise as she heard her words echo. She turned to see Wally rubbing the back of his head.

“Ass hats,” Sergei messaged.

May checked to make sure that it was Sergei and not Lea before chuckling. “Don’t act like you wouldn’t abuse the fuck out of being able to talk.”

A winking face emoji popped up on screen.

“That’s what I thought.” May smiled before ducking down below an archway.

The cave opened up to a larger chamber, the rock ceiling ascending farther up. May groaned as she realized just how many paths branched off from this chamber alone.

Wayne breathed out a sigh of relief before standing up to his full height. “At least the other caves look bigger.”

“Yeah, I-” May trailed off as she took a closer look at the walls.

Several of what she thought were rocks moved slightly at their conversation, shifting slightly closer to each other. Some towards the bottom were smooth, some holding on towards the top were lumpy...

May swallowed down a lump in her throat at the fact that three towards the back of the chamber were spiky.

“What-”

May shushed the tall man before reaching down to her belt and grabbing Leshy’s ball. The various Pokémon hadn’t outwardly reacted yet, but better to be safe than-

They were all shivering.

May lifted her hand up to stop Wayne as he pulled out a pair of poke balls. “Hold up.”

Leshy formed just to her right. “Ivy?” He tilted his head before looking towards the cave. “Saur.”

“Leshy, could you let loose a very VERY low power Razor Leaf and pile them up in the center?” May asked.

Leshy tilted his head to the side before nodding. ‘Always the bleeding heart.’

‘What’s going on?’ Samie poked his head out from below ground again. ‘Why is mom attacking the ground.’

“Samie, I need you to dig up to the top of the cave and make holes in the ceiling that lead outside. We aren’t that far from the entrance and this cave isn’t that tall, so it should be a fairly short trip,” May whispered as the first set of leaves formed on the cave floor.

Samie just nodded before diving underground again.

Wally slowly moved further in, before leaning up close to May’s ear. “What are you doing?”

“They’re freezing. I wanted to give them a fire to warm up next to,” May said.

Wally looked back towards the cave walls before nodding. “I’ll have Gawain grab Samie when he falls out of the ceiling.”

May blanched slightly. “I, uh. Didn’t think about that.”

“Pinch!” The orange gremlin in question fell from the ceiling like a stone before stopping in midair, his jaw slack as he whipped his head around to look at everyone. ‘Again, again!’

“Honestly wouldn’t be a bad idea, you’ll probably want a couple of ventilation shafts.” Wally looked up towards the ceiling and grinned as Samie dived down again the second his feet touched the ground. “Excitable little guy.” He shot me a teasing grin. “Mom, huh?”

May blushed. “Who am I to tell him what to call me?”

Wayne leaned forward and rubbed May’s hair. “I think it’s adorable. I-”

“Slash.” The word was spoken calmly, but the stance was anything but friendly as the largest of the three spiky rock creatures hopped down from his spot on the wall and pointed a single clawed hand at them. ‘Who are you?’

May leaned back slightly before sighing as Suzy quickly got between her and the ground type. “Just travelers passing through. Thought I’d offer you a fire to warm up next to for a bit, you seem cold.”

A fine mist extended out from the Sandslash’s mouth. ‘No tricks?’

‘No tricks,’ Gawain replied. ‘Your people could use the warmth, it looks like, and it’s a fairly simple gesture.’ The fairy type stopped talking as he lifted his hand up and caught the ground type out of the air again.

The Sandslash relaxed, before nodding. “Slash!”

The cave walls started to move, and May leaned back in shock as dozens of eyes looked down from the walls. That... was a lot more than she was expecting.

‘Is this enough?’ Leshy asked.

May shook her head before glancing down at the decently sized pile of leaves. “Should be. Suzy, light it up with a very weak Ember. We want it to last for a bit.”

Suzy opened her beak and spat out a few fires. The kindling ignited instantly.

‘I thank you, traveler. The caves have been quite cold as of late.’ Sandslash relaxed instantly as the heat washed over his skin.

The Geodude and Sandshrew started to shamble closer towards the flames, hopping down from their spots on the wall.

“It won’t last too long, unfortunately. Leaves burn quickly, but it’s better than nothing.” Wally walked forward and smiled at the spiny Pokémon.

‘Meh, now that we have a fire going, I can have a few of the Makuhita venture out to grab firewood.’ Sandslash turned and nodded towards one of the smaller Sandslash, who sighed before going deeper into the cave. ‘Those idiots don’t seem to mind the cold as much. Still, though. It’s rare we get human travelers anymore. Looking for something specific.’ A hint of steel creeped into his voice as the final words left his mouth.

“Yeah, but not a Pokémon. Don’t worry. We’re looking for another human. Probably about Wally’s height, dark silver hair, might exude enough power to flatten this entire cave system if you pissed him off,” Wayne explained.

Sandslash winced. ‘Ah, him. A few of my younglings were stupid enough to pick a fight with him. I’m happy he was benevolent enough to let them off with a minor beatdown.’ Sandslash pointed towards the cave at the far end of the chamber. ‘Last I saw, he went down that chamber.’

Jasmine brightened before jogging forward. “Sweet, thanks!”

Sandslash moved to stand in front of her, blocking her path. ‘I’m perfectly content to allow you passage, though I ask that you take a moment to enjoy your own creation, maybe stoke the flames until the bruisers get back with wood.’

Jasmine backed away from the ground type slowly before almost tripping over a Geodude. “I suppose we can stay for a bit.”

“Jasmine, I don’t think you have to worry too much about the big scary Sandslash. Calm down.” Wayne walked over and wrapped his arm around Jasmine’s shoulders.

May nodded towards the large ground type before glancing down at her Pokémon. “You guys good to make sure the fire keeps going for a bit?”

Suzy leaned back, her beak pulled tight in a sneer. ‘Little flames like that? Child’s play.’

‘I suppose I can tough out this cold if we’re near a fire, and it’s been a bit since I’ve been out for something other than a fight.’ Leshy narrowed his eyes at his trainer.

“You’re the one that complained about the cold during training,” May said.

Leshy sighed before moving closer to the fire and letting a few leaves out to burn. ‘Guess I lose most of my right to complain, huh? Meh, that’s never stopped me before. It’s cold out here, but the ball is boring.’

“Noted. I’m counting on you two to keep the fire going for a bit, alright?” May smiled down at the two as they nodded.

‘Thank you. This cold air isn’t entirely new to this cave, but this is the first time it’s ventured this far up.’ The group of Pokémon scrambled out of the way as the large Sandslash walked forward and gazed into the flickering flames. ‘Is the island in a similar state?’

“Yeah, the cold front’s been... not fun.” Wally crouched down before sitting down on the ground. “Samie was right, that’s really cold.”

Sandslash chuckled. ‘If you think that’s bad, try digging through the stuff. It’s a miracle none of the babes born in the last few days bore white skin, though at the rate we’re going, it’s only a matter of time.’

May instantly leaned forward. “White skin?”

‘A quirk of my line’s genetics. Those born to a frigid environment adapt to the world around them and change.’ Sandslash turned away from the fire and grinned at her. ‘In fact, if you go further in, you’ll run into a few. Descendants of a group of Sandshrew that retreated to the colder parts of the chamber to escape predators.’ Sandslash chuckled. ‘Smart bunch, honestly, though for some reason, I’ve never seen a member of their tribe evolve. It’s the only reason I’m worried about the cold.’

May frowned. “They probably won’t unless you can find Ice Stones in the cave somewhere. Alolan Sandshrew, that’s what the research community calls white-skinned Sandshrew, evolve when exposed to that.”

Sandslash turned and stared into May’s eyes, his eyes widening as a smile pulled at his lips. ‘Well then, that’s good to know. It is possible, at least. Thank you. Back to the matter at hand, though. You say the island has also started to cool down?’ He shook his head. ‘Mildly worrying, but I suppose that explains why my home is so inhospitable.’

“You said the caves get colder deeper down. Any reason why?” Jasmine asked.

Sandshrew shook his head. ‘Near as I can see, it only really happens around the Ancient Basin. Whole place down there is weird, honestly. Too cold for me and my ilk to do much exploring. The Frostclaw tribe would be the better group to ask.’

Jasmine bit her lower lip before sighing. “Yeah, guess that checks out. You guys aren’t exactly equipped for the cold.”

‘I’m surprised to see you lot doing so well. The islanders that I know are complete babies if you throw any kind of cold air at them.’ Sandslash started to chuckle.

A pair of fat, yellow blobs with boxing gloves filed out towards the group as they brought in an entire log over their shoulders.

That was a hell of a lot of firewood.

Sandslash groaned before rising up to his full height. ‘I told you to bring wood for a fire, not chop down a tree. What the hell am I supposed to do with this?’

The fighting types looked towards each other, down towards the tree, then back towards each other with a grin. “Hita.” The word came from two mouths at the same damn time. The pair got to work chopping into the tree with their bare hands.

Gloved hands, though the greater research community at large wasn’t quite sure if those gloves aren’t actually just Makuhita’s skin. Leshy launched another salvo of leaves into the fire as they got to work, and Suzy spat out a few more embers to keep the smoldering flame ablaze.

Sandslash sighed before turning back around. ‘Thank you, really. You’ve been quite the help. For payment, please heed my advice and be careful as you plunge further down. The caves have been odd for the last few days, and it’s not just the cold. Chambers are shifting around, hallways that used to lead to nowhere now connect to places that didn’t exist, and the Zubat are more spooked than usual.’ Sandslash shivered. ‘A few younglings have already gotten lost, so tread carefully.’

Wally hopped to his feet before patting Gawain on the back. “Thank you for your advice, but even if we do get lost, Gawain can get us out.” Wally smiled. “Though honestly, this chamber feels like a good spot to come back to for camp, assuming you don’t mind us imposing on your hospitality.”

Sandslash started laughing. ‘So long as you don’t mind me taking advantage of your Combusken, I take no issue with it. Welcome to the tribe, travelers.’

May nodded before glancing back towards the cave Sandslash pointed out. She swallowed before taking lead, taking note of the much more cautious steps Wayne and Jasmine were taking as they went down.

Normal POV

Wally’s screen glared back at me as I leaned back in bed, my hair still dripping from what was probably a longer than was healthy shower. Still no messages.

I sighed before letting the phone fall against my chest. They were probably fine, they didn’t leave all that long ago, really. Nothing to worry about.

...May could at least send me pictures of cool rocks or something.

I glanced down at my empty belt before leaning my head back against the pillow, struggling to remember a time I was honestly, truly alone in the last month and a half. My nose curled up at the thought, and I lifted the phone up to check for messages again.

Legend’s above, I really was pathetic. A quiet evening after a long training session was probably a good thing, really. It gave me a chance to unpack things. Absol really was Sol, we were being haunted, my starter passed out if she tried to combine elemental manipulation with Psybeam...

I checked the phone again. Still nothing. “Fuck this.” Swiping up, I quickly locked on to the address book. Half a dozen names popped up that I didn’t recognize, and I slapped my forehead.

“Right, not May’s phone. Oops.” I moved to swipe over to the keypad before freezing as a single name jumped out at me. Specifically, the fact that the name had hearts around it. “Ohhh, Wally, you’re going to have some explaining to do when you get out. I don’t know who Tabitha is, but you’re going to get an earful for not sharing with the class.”

I swiped again and brought up messenger. It didn’t look that bad if I called this soon into the trip if I had a reason, right? Didn’t paint me as desperate?

Who the hell was I kidding here?

“How’s subterranean sleuthing going?” I hit the send button and sighed, rubbing my eyes before snapping to attention at an almost instantaneous reply.

“Thanks for making me money. I knew you would cave first.” What? What the hell did that mean?

Rude. The line was silent for a bit before another message popped up, this one clearly labeled May. “Sorry, Sergei’s working as our light in the darkness, and Wayne got to it before I did. The most exciting thing we’ve found so far is a Sandshrew and Geodude colony. How’s life up top?”

I frowned. “Was the colony friendly, or did you have to crack some skulls?”

May sent a frowny face emoji in response. “We do not crack the skulls, Lea. We lightly cook and put to sleep, get it right. They were really chill once I had Suzy make them a fire. Like I said though, enough about me, how’s training?”

I groaned, before leaning back against the pillow. “Well, Joern’s still having issues with Knock Off. He’s not having much trouble pulling the energy, but he’s struggling with pushing it out and using it offensively. The attacks just look and act like normal punches.”

The line stayed quiet for a bit, with no indication that someone was typing on the other end.

I frowned before typing out the next message. “Lucas had been working on improving his speed, though he’s kind of hitting a brick wall. He knows he can move faster, but he doesn’t know how, and it’s bothering him enough that he’s not making as many puns as usual. Apollo’s doing the same, and the fact that he can’t move as fast as he once did is driving him nuts.”

I sighed, wondering if it’d be better to lean into boosting his ranged options more. He was still fast enough to play keep away, and his Air Cutter got way more bad ass now that he’s evolved. Joern could take a break from Knock Off to help him learn Water Pulse. Maybe we could dive into improving Air Cutter into Air Slash...

“Apollo does know he won’t ever be quite as fast, right? It’s less a skill issue and more a biological one, his body isn’t as aerodynamic as it was before,” May messaged.

I smiled. “Yeah, you more or less just echoed my thoughts, I’m probably going to work on going in a slightly different direction soon. Emilie knocked herself out when she tried to combine Psybeam with her elemental manipulation.” I sighed thinking about the little weeb. The fact that she charged the attack like a freaking Kamehameha still made me laugh. “Tell Gawain thanks for that, by the way. She’s been super excited all morning.”

When she wasn’t worried about Sol being a general menace to society and me being able to see ghosts.

“You are quite welcome, your grace. It was my honor to pass along that information to the princess.” Well, nice to know Gawain’s doing good.

“Sorry, Gawain got excited. Maybe tell Emilie to not push herself that hard,” May messaged.

I giggled. “Can do. I’m at the center right now getting everyone looked over.” I felt my cheeks heat up a bit. “I uh, don’t suppose you could send me Eve’s number? Wally doesn’t have it in his address book, and I forgot it.”

“Stay out of my contacts.” That message popped up fast, damn.

I smirked. “What’s wrong Wally, worried I’ll tell them about Tabitha?”

The line went quiet for a bit before a single ten digit message popped up on the screen, followed by a message from Jasmine. “May and Wally are a bit tied up right now, so here you go. Though why you couldn’t find your sister on messenger I don’t know.”

A laugh bubbled up at the thought. Eve? Use messenger? “My sister still uses a fifty-six k modem for the bakery’s computer.”

Thank fuck that our neighbors never changed their wifi password.

“Understood, I am so sorry,” Jasmine messaged.

“Right, tell the idiots that I’m glad they’re having fun, would you?” I asked.

“Can do, take it easy. Don’t spend all your time training, okay?” Jasmine messaged.

I smiled, before tapping on the number she sent me and saving it to contacts. Let’s see here. Ring once, twice...

“Hello, thank you for calling. ‘Eve Sakai’ is not-” I swiped through the red end call button.

Why am I not surprised she doesn’t have a personalized message for her voice mail? I groaned as I pulled myself up and crouched over the phone, glaring at the screen before letting my eyes flicker to the bracelet on my left wrist.

Setting the phone down on the end table, I sighed before pulling the stupid thing off and twirling it around on my finger. I honestly don’t know why I wore the damn thing all the time. Not like I actually have the damn mega stone to go with it. Not like the hunk of metal looked nice. At all.

Guess it was too much to hope that Dad would’ve cared about looking stylish.

Legends above, being alone gave me way too much time to think. I already have enough to worry about with Sol and ghost dad, I didn’t need to add dealing with my own daddy issues on top of that.

Fuck, that was going to be an awkward conversation. I still needed to figure out how the hell to talk to her about that without being called a sideshow act and a fake. She should be grateful, really! How many people have someone love them so much they tough it out through fucking dying?

...I wouldn’t be doing much better if someone told me they could patch me through to talk to the old man, would I? Not like he’d stick around, the prick.

A loud buzzing pulled me from my thoughts, and I grabbed the phone without even checking the ID. “Hey Eve, sorry, Sergei’s with May right now and I’m using another friend’s phone, I just wanted to talk-”

The deep chuckling that came from the other end of the line made my face heat up as I realized this was not, in fact, Eve.

“I suppose that answers the first two questions I had in ‘Who are you?’ and ‘Why do you have my nephew’s phone?’, though now I find myself wondering about your name.” The voice on the other end of the line was light and airy, despite its deep tones.

“Uh, Lea. Sorry, guess I should check the caller ID. I just called my sister, and it went to voicemail, so I just assumed, and I’m just going to hang up now. I am so sorry.” Could this bed just swallow me up please?

“No, no, there’s no need for that. I’m quite content to talk with one of my nephew’s friends, though I could have sworn he said your name was Shizuka...” he trailed off. “No matter. Lee, was it? How are you today?”

“I, uh. It’s Lea, not Lee. I suppose I’m doing alright. Thanks. I’m guessing you’re Wally’s genius uncle that I’ve heard so much about? The genius that works for a member of the elite four?” Why did my mouth feel so dry all of a sudden?

A loud laugh sounded from the other end of the line. “Hah, I suppose that word works, but I think Wally’s the only one that calls me that. Everyone at the office calls me a mad doctor, though if you would, I quite prefer Walter to all of them.”

“Right, well Wally’s currently spelunking in the caves with a few friends. They’ll probably be gone for a few days. I don’t really have a phone, so-”

“My nephew left you his.” A sigh echoed through the line. “I suppose that’s fair, though I wish he called and told me that before he went down. I wanted to check up with him to see how his suit was doing.”

I got up from bed and started to walk in front of the bed, a smile on my face. “I’m honestly more inclined to agree with Wally, that thing’s incredible. I have no clue how you threw it together in less than a week.”

“He hasn’t had any issues? Good, good. I was a bit worried the mechanisms that controlled the mouth plate wouldn’t work for meals. He left in quite the hurry, and we didn’t get a chance to test certain features.” A sigh sounded out through the line. “Getting that boy to pick up the phone is a chore sometimes, I swear. What is it about teenagers that make them not want to talk to their parents?”

I paused at the choice in words, before deciding to push past and ignore it. “Couldn’t tell you, I talk to Eve all the time.”

“I guess I’m just unlucky then.” The line went quiet but for the faint sound of papers rustling on a desk.

I shuffled in place awkwardly. Was he expecting me to say something? “Uh, sorry about that, by the way.”

“Hmm? Oh, don’t worry dear, I’m quite used to it. Young people don’t want to talk to old people, I think it’s just a fact of life,” Walter said.

“Er, not about that. I’m probably the reason Wally left in a hurry, I just got out of the hospital recently. Wally came to make sure I was okay.” I shuffled awkwardly in place.

A snort sounded over the phone. “My dear, it’s hardly your fault that you got hurt. Still though, I’m quite happy my nephew has someone he values so highly to drop everything to go see.” The last few words lilted upwards suggestively.

“I’m happily in a relationship with my girlfriend, May.” I stressed the word girl in that sentence.

“Of course you-” The line went silent, and it almost sounded like Walter was choking on something. “Did you say May?”

The light airy tone was gone, replaced with a severe gravity that made me take a step away from the phone. Was I still talking to the same person?

“Y-yes?” The line went silent again. “Is everything alright?”

“Yes, it’s just that the world is far, FAR smaller than it has any right to be.” A loud sigh echoed through the speaker. “Still though, I’m happy May found her courage to take the plunge, she was in quite the state when I talked to her in that hospital room, for more than one reason.”

“Huh?” I asked.

“I sat with May in the waiting room for a bit. Helped calm her down, talked her through a few panic attacks, and offered a bit of life advice. I’m happy to see she took it, and even happier that you seem to have pulled through. You’re a nice girl.” Walter sounded pained as the words left his mouth.

My eyes widened. “Wait, you’re the weirdo from the waiting room?”

A choking sound once again flitted out of the speaker. “Laura, please. Weirdo is my least favorite nickname.”

“Oh, sorry, I say things without thinking sometimes. My filter really isn’t the best. Still though, May talks about you a lot. She used the same trick you did with her to pull me out of my episodes when I still had them.” I shivered.

Walter stayed quiet for a bit. “I suppose the incident that left you hospitalized-”

“Happened underground.” I finished. Oddly enough, I didn’t feel the same crawling sensation when I talked about it this time. That was a good thing, right? An improvement?

“Right, uh, I guess I should apologize this time for bringing it up, eh Leanne?” Walter asked.

“Don't worry about it, I’m getting better, and I feel like I can talk about stuff again.” That was close enough to the truth, right? “And it’s Lea.”

“Oh? Yes, of course, dear.” Walter chuckled lightly into the phone. “Oh, does the poke center cafeteria in Dewford still have those deep fried pickle chips? Those were always my favorite when I visited the area.”

I couldn’t tell if he was being senile, or I was being fucked with.

Yes. The answer was probably yes.

“I can’t say that I’ve checked, Walter.” I sighed before a random thought brought an evil smile to my lips. “Hey, Walter, could you tell me who Tabitha is?”

“Oh, has Wally mentioned her? She’s my personal assistant down at the labs, though I’ve all but adopted the poor girl.” The line went quiet for a moment. “She’s around the house all the time, usually making sure I stay on task and not off scaring the village people.” Walter’s voice sounded annoyed towards the end of the sentence. “She spoils all my fun, Lyna.”

“Sounds like she has a very tough job.” I giggled a bit at the whine that sounded from the other end of the line. “Out of idle curiosity, how old is she?”

“Oh, she’s actually only twenty. Now you want to talk about geniuses, that girl has brains in spades. It amazes me that she can keep up with my ramblings and aid in our experiments at such a young age.” The pride that filled Walter’s voice made me smile. “Ugh, the fact that the ass hats that had her before couldn’t see her potential baffles me to this day, honestly, Lea, some people shouldn’t be allowed to have children.”

I winced, not expecting the sudden rush of information on someone I had never met.

A coughing fit assaulted my ears. “Ah, I’ve said too much again. Sorry. Why do you ask? If you don't mind my asking.”

I grinned again. Time to return the favor for Wally’s wingman services. “Well, Walter, if you’re eager to try and fix Wally up with someone, I’ve got a bit of a secret to share with you...”