Emmy And Me

Emmy stayed at my house for the rest of the Christmas break. We went back to her house every now and then to get her fresh clothes and check that everything was going O.K. at the estate, but other than that our routine was the same as it had been that first day. I went to work at the nursery during the day, while Emmy stayed home with Tiff and Mom. She would show up at work to pick me up and take me home, where we would have dinner with the family. We went down to San Diego a few times to see movies or go shopping, but for the most part we were just homebodies. I got very used to the lifestyle in no time at all. With every day that passed I knew with greater certainty that this was the way I wanted my life to be.

Tiff was over the moon, too. She absolutely adored Emmy, and Emmy was so sweet to my little sister that even Mom had to agree that having Emmy stay with us was a very good thing.

Every day was better than the last. Being around Emmy so much just confirmed my feelings and made it very clear I wanted to spend the rest of my life with her. I wanted it so bad I could taste it. Emmy, for her part, seemed happier than I’d ever seen her. She had settled in to the household routine, and even as small as our apartment was compared to her own gigantic home, she seemed content with her new working-class lifestyle.

Every time she picked me up from work it gave me a little thrill to know that she was waiting for me, looking forward to our evenings together. I certainly know that seeing her waiting for me by the nursery office at four o’clock brightened my day by one thousand per cent every single time.

In fact, that little warm feeling I got inside got to be a very common experience. Seeing Emmy and Tiff on the couch reading together made me melt inside. Seeing Emmy’s sleepy face in the morning when I got up to go to work flooded me with emotions that were almost too big for my body to contain, and watching her undress for bed made me feel a mixture of lust for her incredible hard little body, giddy anticipation that she was about to climb into my bed, and pride that she was mine and nobody else’s. Sleeping in that tiny bed, our bodies snuggled up against each other, was as wonderful as anything in my life had ever been and I knew I would do anything to stay that way forever.

It wasn’t all perfect, living in that little apartment with Mom and Tiff. Emmy and I had to be quiet at night, for one thing. Although my room was at the opposite end of the hall from Mom’s, the hall just wasn’t very long at all. Once Emmy sang Tiff her lullaby every night she was out like a light, but Emmy and I still couldn’t be sure that Tiff wouldn’t barge into my room in the middle of the night and catch us making love, so we kept it to kissing, snuggling and some groping in our sleepwear.

One day we got busted leaving the bathroom together after a particularly hot and steamy shower. Mom and Tiff weren’t home when we got back to the house after my work, so we took the opportunity for a little soapy time and didn’t hear Tiff and Mom return.

“Did you guys just take a shower together?” Tiff asked as we exited the bathroom, to my surprise and embarrassment.

Emmy, perfectly calm, explained it to Tiff. “Tiffany, when you take a bath, you enjoy it when your mother washes your hair, do you not? It is the same for me. I adore it when Leah washes my hair, so that is why we showered together.” This seemed reasonable to Tiffany, but I heard Mom snicker to herself in the kitchen. I’m sure my face was red, but Tiffany didn’t notice. Mom didn’t say anything then, but at dinner that night she asked “Isn’t the shower a bit small for the two of you?” just to watch me squirm with embarrassment.

The third of January rolled around way too soon- I wasn’t looking forward to the start of school at all. The last week and a half with Emmy staying at my house had been wonderful, but I knew that returning to school would be a nasty shock to the system. Oh, well, back to the same old grind. Only two terms of high school left and then it was goodbye and so long, FHS. I couldn’t afford to let my grades hit the senior slide yet, so my negative attitude was a bad sign. It isn’t that I didn’t like school, it’s just that Christmas break had been the best time of my life and now it was over.

Pulling Emmy’s Mini into the parking lot, I felt an odd sense of dread at returning to the regularly scheduled programming. Emmy didn’t seem to have any such reservations, though. She seemed as cheerful as ever as she grabbed her backpack from the back seat.

Sighing, I shouldered my backpack to follow Emmy to Home Room. Walking towards the main gate, I saw Janice Weaver give me a ‘come over here’ wave. Telling Emmy I’d catch up, I went to see what Janice wanted.

“Leah,” she began, clearly nervous, looking around to see who was watching.

“What’s up?” I asked, puzzled by her behavior.

“Did you check Facebook last night?” she asked.

“No, I didn’t. I’m not really all that into it. I mean, I only check every now and then.”

“Well, you ought to check it out ASAP. Seriously.”

“Um, O.K. It’ll have to wait until I get home tonight, though,” I replied, wondering what the big deal was.

“Check it on your phone. Right now,” Janice insisted.

“My phone? I can’t. All I’ve got is an old Nokia that doesn’t do anything like that,” I said, a bit embarrassed to be behind the times. Truth is, it never really bothered me to not play Angry Birds or check my email on my phone, but I know it makes me seem like some kind of throwback.

“Are you kidding me? Well, here. Use mine,” Janice said, thrusting her smart phone into my hands, then when I fumbled with it unsure what to do she grabbed it back and brought Facebook up. She scrolled through the posts, and found what she wanted me to see.

“It’s a video. Press play,” she demanded.

I touched the screen, and there in small but reasonably clear view was a video of Emmy and me kissing by the movie theater in San Diego where we’d gone to see Black Swan the afternoon before.

“Oh, shit,” I whispered, as the two tiny figures in the video held each other in what was obviously a lover’s embrace. I looked at the comments, and there were a lot of them. A whole lot. It seemed as if half the school had had something to say about it, and plenty of it wasn’t very nice.

“Yeah, ‘oh shit’ is right. You are so outed, Leah. You and Emmy. I just wanted you to know what you’re walking into today,” Janice said. “You and me, we’ve never really been close, but we’ve known each other for a long time, and I thought you’d want to see this.”

“Yeah, thanks. I appreciate it.” When I turned to head to Home Room, Janice decided to walk with me.

“So, I mean, is it what it looks like?” she asked.

I heard no malice or judgment in her voice, and denying it wasn’t going to do me any good, so I just said “Yeah, it is. It’s exactly what it looks like.”

“Well, I don’t have any problem with it, you being gay, I mean. But there are plenty of others here that will. Have a problem with it, I mean,” she added.

“Yeah, I saw some of the comments,” I said, dejected at the way the day was starting out. Hell, the way the term was starting.

“Well, see you later,” Janice said, as she had reached her Home Room. I had a little farther to go, and believe me, I could feel eyes on me like never before. It felt as if everybody were staring at me.

Taking my seat next to Emmy, I said in a low voice “We’ve got trouble.” Before I could explain, Miss Takei called the class to attention for the morning announcements. Thankfully, I didn’t hear “Leah Farmer and Emmy Lascaux are gay for each other” on the loudspeaker, but it sure felt as if it might happen. Had everybody at school seen the video? Damn.

After Home Room, on our way to First Period, I told Emmy what Janice had shown me.

“Practically everybody at school is going to know, Em. If they didn’t know last night, they’ll find out today,” I said, feeling devastated.

Emmy’s reaction surprised me. “Well, if there is no use in trying to hide what we have…” she said, and then she took my hand in hers and walked with a satisfied expression next to me. “Then I will show how proud I am to have the most beautiful, most powerful girlfriend at Fallbrook High School.” I know there’s a rule against PDAs at our school and technically we were violating it, but there was no way I was going to let go of Emmy’s hand. When she took my hand and said she was happy to be with me, I knew that I would put up with any amount of grief for her sake. We walked hand in hand to Calculus, and I made a point of looking people straight in the eyes as we passed.

Candace was on a roll at art. “I always figured you for a dyke,” she said as I sat down at the table next to the one she shared with Stephanie. “Jock chicks,” she explained to Stephanie. “It’s all that extra testosterone. Turns ‘em into carpet-muncher lezzies.”

Stephanie looked really uncomfortable, to her credit. Candace continued “Look at how big Leah is- she’s probably taking steroids, hoping to grow a dick.”

I’d been trying to ignore her, but just couldn’t any more. “Look, Candace. You are a fucking bitch- you always have been. If you were on fire I wouldn’t even bother to pee on you to put it out. Shut the hell up.”

Randy, sitting on the other side of the two cheerleaders, snickered at that. “What the fuck are you laughing at, loser boy?” demanded Candace.

“I’m laughing at you, loser girl,” he responded. It wasn’t the best comeback, but it seemed to work. Candace’s volume increased enough that everybody in class could clearly hear her.

“Loser? You’re calling me loser? You’re the one that works at the gas station!”

Just then Mrs. Rubias (the art teacher) walked in. “Candace,” she said. “What is it that has you so upset?” Her tone was unsympathetic, to say the least.

“Nothing,” grumbled Candace.

“Well, then. Please sit down and be quiet.” Candace did as she was told, giving both Randy and me the evil eye.

After the teacher told us what we were going to do that day and we settled down to our still lifes, Candace started trash-talking me to Stephanie again. I couldn’t make it out very well because she was speaking quietly so the teacher wouldn’t hear. I could make out my name and Emmy’s, of course, but the rest of it wasn’t clear.

Glancing over at Stephanie, I caught her eye. She seemed to have a look that said “sorry” but I couldn’t be too sure.

Turning my back on the two cheerleaders, I got to work with my pencil and sketchpad. I tried to put it all out of my mind, but it was hard to focus on my drawing. There was no point in stewing on it, and I wasn’t going to give Candace the satisfaction of letting her know she was getting to me. I knew it was going to be a long six months until Emmy and I got out of this place, but there was nothing to do but ignore people like Candace. It was going to be tough, but that was life. If that was going to be the price for being in a relationship with Emmy, I would pay it with a smile on my face.

When I got to the caf at lunchtime, only Tom was sitting at our usual table. He looked unhappy, and when I sat down he blurted out why.

“Allie said she isn’t going to sit here any more. She doesn’t want to associate herself with a couple of lesbians.”

“Why is that? I mean, it’s not like Emmy and I are any different than we were yesterday, or last week, or the month before. What makes us so horrible now?” I demanded.

“Look, I know- I mean, I’m here, right? As far as I’m concerned you guys are just as cool as ever. Maybe more so. It’s just- well, it’s my family. Our parents are really conservative, and they just don’t like gay people.” He looked hurt, as if his sister’s abandoning Emmy and me was a personal affront. “I thought Allie wasn’t like that, but…” he trailed off, looking apologetic.

“I guess I’m finding out who my real friends are,” I grumbled. “Tom, thanks. I mean it. I’m glad you’re here.”

We ate lunch in silence. I was acutely aware of the stares I was receiving from the other kids eating lunch, and it seemed Tom was, too, but he was going to stick up for me, and I appreciated that.

Courtney never showed, and neither did Emmy. Finally, I asked Tom if he knew where they were.

“I don’t know where Courtney is. I haven’t seen her all day. She wasn’t at Home Room this morning. I think I saw Emmy talking to Andy Temple earlier.”

“Oh, jeeze. I’ll bet that’s going well. I guess Emmy never does shy away from challenges, does she?”

“Uh, what do you mean?” asked Tom.

“Andy’s got a thing for Emmy. If he’s seen the video or heard the rumors, which I’m sure he has, it can’t be good.”

“Um, speaking of rumors… So is it really true? Did you come out?” Tom asked.

“Come out? Well, that’s not exactly how I’d describe what happened, but yeah, pretty much. The whole world now knows what Emmy and I have.”

“I think… well, I mean… Ah, hell. That takes some balls. I’m glad you’re out. It’s gonna be tough for you for a while, but you and Emmy are real strong. You’ll be O.K.,” Tom declared. “You’ll be O.K. Just… just fuck ‘em all. Fuck Allie. Fuck the rest of ‘em. They’re all just assholes,” he said, bitterly. “If they want to hate on people just because they’re gay, well, that’s their problem. Fuck, I can’t wait to get out of this damned little town.”

“Uh, Tom,” I asked. “Were we talking about my situation here?”

“Yeah. Yeah, we were,” Tom replied quickly, with an intensity that made me wonder what was going on.

“Do… do you want to talk? Maybe later, after school?” I asked, unsure what to say.

“No, it’s cool. Don’t forget, Leah. I’m your friend, no matter how anybody dumps on you. No matter what they say.”

Lunch was over, and it was time to head to class. Emmy wasn’t in Bio, either, and I was starting to worry a bit. Much to my surprise, she and Andy were waiting outside the classroom when Bio was over. They looked comfortable with each other- happy, even. Not what I’d expected at all, I have to say.

“Um… What’s up?” I asked, not sure what to make of this.

Andy spoke first. “Leah, I just want to tell you that if you and Emmy are happy, I’m happy. I mean, sure, I’m a little disappointed in how things worked out, but…”

“Seriously, that’s it?” I asked, incredulous. I’d been so sure this was going to be a scene that I just couldn’t believe it.

“Yeah, pretty much. Emmy and I had a long talk, and we’re good. You and me, we’ve always been sorta friends, and that isn’t going to change. That would be stupid. As far as I’m concerned that’s all there is to say.”

“Man,” I said in relief. “I just wish everybody was as understanding as you’re being. It’s been shitty today.”

Emmy spoke up. “How so?”

“Oh, lots of people are being jerks. Allie, and maybe Courtney. Some of the cheerleaders. I don’t know. A lot of people.”

“Well, you guys are going to have a tough time. It’s just the way it is. But if you need somebody to talk to, call me,” he said as he turned to go to his next class.

Turning to Emmy, I said “Wow. I didn’t expect he’d be so cool about the whole thing.”

“Yes, he is a very good person. I feel very fortunate to have him as a friend.”

“You never told me why it didn’t work out between you two. I know you went on a couple of dates, right?” I asked.

“I will tell you about it later. Now we have to get to class.”