Emmy And Me

Emmy had healed up nicely from her injuries, and even though I could tell her ribs hurt, she was back to practice with Lee and Jackson way before I thought was wise. Still, I wasn’t going to tell her what to do, just try to make it work for her as best as possible. Soon enough things were back to the way they were before the attack, and I had mixed feelings about that. I was spending my time working out, attending classes and just plain working. Emmy was mostly focused on her music, and when she wasn’t at the rehearsal space she did a lot of sleeping. I was O.K. with her getting a lot of sleep. I mean, that’s when healing happens, right? Every now and then she’d move wrong, like when she put on her shoes or something like that and I’d see her wince with discomfort, but never, ever once did I hear her make even a single sound of pain.

One thing we did very little of was discussing the attack, talking about its ramifications, or really, anything about it at all. Emmy seemed to be perfectly happy handing over the reins to our little nation, and it seemed that the strays accepted the new paradigm just as easily. When any calls for direction, advice or guidance came in, they were always to me, not Emmy.

Michael had also assumed the role of my second in command, for which I was grateful. He was an intelligent man and took his duties very seriously, which allowed me to hand off a lot of the day to day, minor issues that arose. It seemed as if the Strays were settling into their new lives just fine and getting on an even keel, so after discussing it with Emmy, I sent Michael, Hakan and Eddie further afield. The Bay Area was just the start and I thought we’d pretty well found all the strays that wanted to be found, so it was time to broaden our search. Figuring that the hugely spread-out cities of Southern California might be tough to canvas, the guys went north, first to Portland and then to Tacoma, Seattle and Vancouver.

Portland proved to be a positive surprise. The guys quickly found a local Night Child man who led them to the small community that had formed there for mutual protection. When Michael told them about our new nation in the Bay Area and the benefits that had resulted to the nearly two dozen Night Children who had joined, they agreed to meet Emmy and me.

I’d never been to the Northwest, so I was looking forward to making it a week-long vacation. Emmy complained some about missing rehearsal time, but when I pointed out that we’d hardly spent any time together in a very long while she relented. I booked us a suite at a classy old hotel in the center of downtown Portland, realizing with a start that I’d gotten used to having money. In the past the idea of a three hundred dollar a night room would have seemed completely ridiculous, but now it didn’t even make me blink. Wow, how things change.

I liked the idea of driving up for a couple of reasons. The first was that we needed a way to get around in Portland, and Emmy thought it was important to have a car that indicated power and prestige. I looked into luxury car rentals, but again, just couldn’t bring myself to spend the money. Seriously, it would have cost us a couple of grand just to rent a car like the two in our garage, so that was a non-starter as far as I was concerned.

Mainly, though, I wanted to drive because I’d never been north of San Francisco and I’d heard that the coast was beautiful. I mean, redwoods! It would add two days to get there and a day to get back if we took the freeway, but I wanted to spend time with my fiancée and a romantic bed and breakfast on the coast seemed like a great way to reconnect. Just the two of us, maybe some champagne, some strawberries… you get the idea. I reserved us a room in a super cute old Victorian-style B&B in a little town with a historic main street on the north coast of California. The pictures online made it seem as if the town were exactly the way it must have been a hundred years ago. No fast food chains, no big box strip malls. Just cute shops and local restaurants. I couldn’t wait to surprise Emmy. I emailed the owners and they promised they’d have the bubbly and the berries ready for us when we arrived, so I was jazzed.

The drive was as good as I’d hoped it would be. The Upper California coast was amazing, and there’s a whole lot more of the state up there than I’d realized. I mean, I’d lived almost all my life within an hour’s drive of the Mexican border and to me the Bay Area was Northern California, right? Turns out that San Francisco is only about two-thirds up the state, and there’s a whole additional four hundred miles to go before you get to Oregon. There’s a whole part of the state they call the ‘Lost Coast’ because it’s so undeveloped and remote. It was wonderful, and when Emmy suggested maybe buying a cabin or something up there it sounded good to me.

We got to the little town with the bed and breakfast just about sunset, the late summer twilight giving the tiny town a magical quality. After checking in we walked down the main street to look at the quaint little shops and find something to eat.

I’d gotten used to people’s reaction at seeing Emmy, so I didn’t even notice it at first when a teenaged girl spun her mom around and pointed at Emmy. Since they were on the other side of the street I couldn’t hear what they were saying, but after a few moments the girl dragged her mother over to where we were looking in the window of a shop that sold ironwork and metal sculptures.

“Oh my god!” exclaimed the dark-haired girl, who looked to be about fourteen years old or so. “It’s really you! Can I take your picture?” she asked Emmy, holding up her phone.

Puzzled, Emmy asked “Why would you wish to take my photo?”

“You’re Emmy Lascaux! You’re my favorite! I can’t believe this! My friend Grace is gonna die when she hears about this!” the girl squealed, hardly even taking a breath.

“You know my music?” Emmy asked, still not quite sure what was going on.

“Know it? I live it! I listen to ‘The Light Of Day’, like, all the time!”

“And do you also like ‘Dark Times’?” Emmy wanted to know. I glanced over at the girl’s mother, who was rolling her eyes.

“Yeah, but it kinda has to be a special occasion for me to listen to it. I mean, it’s really intense, you know? Like when me and Grace get in a fight, or I bomb a test or something.”

Laughing, Emmy granted. “Yes, it is a very intense album. We wanted it to be as raw and primal as possible.”

“Chyeah,” agreed the girl, nodding. “Um, Emmy?”

“Yes?”

“The song ‘I will die for you’? Grace thinks it’s about-“ and she suddenly stopped, remembering her mom was standing right next to her. “Um, Grace thinks it’s…” she trailed off, unsure how to say what she wanted to say and not upset her mom.

“Many people have asked me if it is a song about suicide,” Emmy said, saving the girl from her dilemma. “Some have speculated that it is in response to rejection from a lover, or even fear of announcing one’s sexuality.” The girl turned completely red at this and darted a look at her mom, but fortunately her mother was getting bored and wasn’t paying attention. “But that is not what the song is really about. It is in fact a celebration of life in the face of one’s mortality. Knowing that at the very end, when one has nothing left, there is still the gift of love to give.”

“Grace is not gonna believe me when I tell her. She’s like, convinced it’s about suicide ‘cause you’re afraid to come out of the closet, and can’t tell the one you’re in love with.”

“Well, should we call her and tell her she is wrong?” asked Emmy, smiling and pointing at the girl’s phone, which was still in her hand.

“Seriously?”

“Of course!” Emmy replied.

The girl dialed the number, then when her friend answered she blurted out an amazingly fast yet complete recap of the last few minutes. Clearly her friend didn’t believe her, but she bashfully handed the phone to Emmy. “She doesn’t believe it’s really you,” she explained, somewhat unnecessarily.

“Grace?” asked Emmy. “It is me, Emmy De Lascaux, from the band The Downfall. Your friend-” she glanced over at the girl, who said “Mary” in response to the unspoken question. “Your friend Mary told me you had some questions about my song ‘I will die (for you)’ and asked if I could help clear them up for you.”

I was amused by the whole thing because this was Emmy’s first encounter with a random fan on the street (as far as I knew) and she was taking it very well, completely making this girl’s day.

Emmy talked to Grace for a few minutes, then said goodbye and handed the phone back to Mary. “If you would like a photo with me, we should get your mother to take it,” Emmy suggested. The girl was all too happy to follow the suggestion, and immediately texted the picture (presumably to Grace) when she got her phone back.

“Mary,” Emmy said. “We are working on our third album right now. If you give me your email address I will send you and Grace one of our new songs when I get back home.”

“Really? Before it comes out? Like, before anybody can even buy it?” Mary asked, not believing her good fortune.

“Yes, just like that,” Emmy agreed, taking out her phone to create a new contact for the girl. The two spent a couple of minutes on that while Mary’s mom and I gave ‘I’m bored, but what can you do?’ looks at each other. Eventually Emmy said goodbye to Mary and her mother and we continued in our search for dinner.

At a little restaurant that served home-style food, Emmy asked “Do you think Mary and Grace are in love?”

“I kinda got that feeling, yeah,” I agreed. “I don’t think that they’re anything near ready to tell anyone, though. The idea that Grace’s favorite song is the one she thinks is about suicide can’t be a good thing.” Thinking a moment, I said “I mean, I hate to bring it up, but that was the major problem I had with Stephanie. She just couldn’t bring herself to tell her parents about us.” When I noticed Emmy’s face fall at the mention of Stephanie’s name I hastily added “Well, that, and she just wasn’t you,” which got a little smile.

I ordered for both of us, since Emmy had no idea what dishes like tuna casserole or meatloaf were like. As I said, it was home-style big-time. I figured Emmy would like a chicken pot pie, and I ordered a salad, dry with no dressing and a turkey breast sandwich with no mayo. It’d been over half a year since Sammy laid down the law on my diet and by this point I didn’t even miss fried foods or any of that kind of thing, but I will admit I still drank a Coke every now and then.

“I do hope things work out for Grace and Mary,” said Emmy, bringing me back from my thoughts.

“Yeah, me too. I mean, you and me, we had it easy. Neither of our parents were anti-gay, and we were already seniors with our place in the world already set. I can’t imagine what it would have been like in ninth grade to go through all that.”

“I wish there was something we could do,” Emmy said, looking thoughtful.

“I kinda think you did it. I mean, you completely made Mary’s day, and probably Grace’s, too. If they see you as a positive role model it’s gonna make it easier for them to come to grips with it. Also, telling Grace that her favorite song isn’t about suicide but rather commitment to the one you love couldn’t hurt,” I said, popping a cherry tomato in my mouth.

“I still wish I could do more.”

“Send them that song. That’ll make them both feel extra special, that they have a direct connection to their favorite rock star,” I said. “It certainly makes me feel extra special,” I added, smiling at my weak joke.

That night, in our incredible Victorian fantasy room at the bed and breakfast, I snuck a little box from my luggage. “Em,” I said, a bit bashfully. “This is for you.”

She took the rectangular box and felt the dark blue velvet. Her eyes shining with excitement, she looked up at me for confirmation.

“Open it!” I urged, hoping she would like it.

Emmy carefully opened the box and saw the pendant inside. I’d commissioned a jewelry maker in San Francisco to create it for her, and thought he’d done a wonderful job on the piece.

“Oh…” Emmy sighed as she took the little guitar out of the box and held it up on its golden chain. “It is the exact color of my guitar! Where did you ever find it? I love it so much! It is perfect!”

I reached for the chain, and she turned around so I could fasten it around her neck. Admiring her new jewelry in the large free-standing oval mirror, Emmy’s eyes went moist with tears of happiness. “I love it so much,” Emmy breathed. “I love you so much, Leah,” she breathed as I kissed and nibbled on her slender, graceful dancer’s neck.

I slipped the strap of her little sundress off her shoulder, making my intentions clear. I wanted her so bad I could feel it and Emmy seemed to be in just as ready a mood, so we made passionate beautiful love for the first time in many long, dry months. It was so wonderful to feel her move under my touch, to hear her little gasps of pleasure as I found all the right places with my tongue, to hold her as she trembled in my arms with release. I don’t want to imply that it was one-sided, though- she played my body just as well as I’d ever done to hers. Her touch on my skin, her fingers deep inside me, her amazing tongue playing with my pearl… it was all just so, so very perfect.

Later, exhausted and satisfied, we lay in bed simply holding one another. “I am sorry,” Emmy whispered, waking me as I was dozing off.

“What?” I mumbled, unsure I’d heard her right.

“I am so sorry, Leah. I have been a terrible partner,” she said, her voice low and sad.

“What do you mean?” I asked, my mind coming up with any number of unfortunate scenarios. Maybe one of those groupies that always seem to be hanging out at the studio, or who even knows what… I was making myself more and more upset. I hardly even heard Emmy’s explanation, but when I finally realized she was talking, whispering almost, I quieted my inner voices and listened.

“I have been taking you for granted, Leah. I have been so focused on my music, and I think that somehow I thought that you were keeping yourself busy with school and your workouts, that maybe you did not mind me spending so much time away from you.”

“Well, you’ve been working really hard on your music, Em,” I offered, trying to make excuses for her, still hoping that that’s all it was.

“Yes, and now it seems to me that my music has consumed me, and left nothing for you. Earlier, when you gave me this beautiful necklace, I realized that I haven’t been thinking enough of us, of our relationship. I have been selfish of my time. I think that I must re-evaluate my priorities.”

Even though I agreed with her, I kept it to myself and just pulled her tighter into my arms, and that is how we fell asleep.

The drive to Portland took a lot longer than I’d expected the next day, too. Of course, we had to drive through the redwoods, and that took a fair bit of time, but was well worth it. When we finally arrived at our hotel we were both starving. The concierge recommended a little Chinese restaurant nearby, and I have to say the crispy orange chicken was the best I’ve ever had.

That night Emmy and I made love again after a long soak in the suite’s wonderful old claw-foot tub. Clearly we need to travel more, I thought as I basked in the afterglow, Emmy snuggled up asleep in my arms.

We got up at a leisurely hour and did a bit of sightseeing before it was time for our meeting with the local strays.

Getting ready in our hotel suite, Emmy and I put on what I’d jokingly referred to as our ‘power suits’. Custom tailored, mine was a pantsuit of charcoal gray. A white shirt and black oxfords with low heels set the gray off nicely. I tied my hair back in a ponytail and wore the sapphire studs that Emmy had gotten me for my birthday in my ears. I thought the outfit made me look like a high-priced attorney, which was exactly the sort of power and confidence that I wanted to project.

Emmy’s ensemble was decidedly more feminine. She wore a deep green skirt suit with a pair of matching pumps that almost killed me when I saw how much they cost. Her white silk shirt made a stunning contrast to the vivid color of the suit. For jewelry she wore a string of pearls and some small pearl studs in her ears.

The two of us looked wealthy and powerful, and the concierge just about did back flips for us when we walked out of the elevator and into the lobby. Having money really does make a lot of things in life go easier, all right.

We were scheduled to meet the local group’s leaders at a small park about a mile from the hotel at sunset. We had suggested a daytime meeting and they’d wanted to meet at night, so we compromised. This far north meant that it was light enough for me to see long after the sun had actually gone down, so I was not at a particular disadvantage with sundown, to my relief.

By arrangement we met Michael and Eddie at the park half an hour early to evaluate the situation during daylight and to give us an edge in the negotiations. This worked perfectly, as Emmy had said it would.

Soon enough the three Night Children (accompanied by Hakan) approached where Emmy and I sat at a park picnic table, Michael and Eddie standing behind us. They looked like homeless beggars, they were so shabbily dressed. The three seemed quite timid, and were puzzled by what I was doing there. They seemed quite impressed by Emmy, though, and when she indicated they should sit opposite us at the rough wooden table they didn’t hesitate for a moment.

“Gentlemen,” Emmy began. “Would you like some wine?” she asked, indicating the bottle and glasses Michael had set on the table. “Perhaps a little bite to eat?” she indicated the fresh fruit and sliced French bread. Michael stepped forward and poured some wine for Emmy and me, and then for the three without asking whether they wanted it or not.

One of the three, who presumably was their leader, spoke in their language to Emmy, indicating the food.

“English, please,” Emmy requested, but it sounded more like a command. “This is a new land, and we need to do things in a new way. The old language has no place here,” she said, echoing what Michael had said that first night nearly a year before.

The leader of the three said something in their language again, and Michael stepped forward menacingly. “The queen said to speak in English, and you will do as she says,” he said in a threatening tone. “Show respect!”

This seemed to have the desired effect, because the next words from the man’s mouth were indeed in English. “I apologize, Queen Lascaux. I did not wish to show disrespect.”

“That is good,” Emmy said magnanimously. “English is the language of this land, and therefore it is very important for us to be comfortable with it.” She took a sip of her wine, and so I followed her example. The three others did as well, clearly not wanting to be rude and anger Emmy again.

I took a sweet apple from the bowl of fruit and made a big show of cutting it into pieces using Prince Marfan’s knife, which I’d carried in my jacket’s inside pocket. It had the desired effect. Two of the three Night Children did serious double-takes when they saw the blade and could not take their eyes off it. When I was done slicing the apple, I used a napkin to clean the blade, then set it on the table in front of me, in plain sight. I offered a slice of apple to Emmy, and she accepted it and started nibbling. I offered another piece to the leader of the group and he looked horrified, almost ready to bolt.

Enjoying how the display had unsettled the men, I said “I see you are fascinated by my knife.” I picked it up and casually touched the tip with my index finger.

“How-? Where did you get that?” asked guy number two.

“I took it,” I answered.

“From… from Prince Marfan? He let you take it?”

“He didn’t let me take it,” I answered, making my voice very ominous. “I beat it from him, then I used it to kill him.”

All three of the Portland Night Children looked ready to book it out of there as fast as their feet would carry them when Emmy interrupted their panic. “Prince Marfan made the mistake of trying to attack me,” she said smoothly. “Leah here killed him and his bodyguard. By herself,” she added, to make the point clear. “She is not one to be trifled with, but she only did it because she was defending me. She is my partner, my queen.”

The leader of the three said something that sounded like an expression of surprise in their language, then immediately corrected himself. “I apologize, Queen Lascaux. When your representatives told us that there were two queens, we had no idea that the other was a daylighter. Your representatives spoke very highly of Queen Leah, which puzzled us because we had never heard of such a person. We could never have imagined such a … formidable person as her highness.”

Clearly he’d gotten his bearings back and was reevaluating the situation. My intimidation tactics had worked just as we’d planned, and now the three clearly took us as a force to be reckoned with. Now it was just up to Emmy to play the ‘good cop’ and the deal would be sealed.

“Yes, Queen Leah is a very… powerful woman,” Emmy said, resting her hand on my arm. “But very, very generous, as well. She cares very deeply for those in her shadow, as I am sure Michael, Hakan and Eddie have told you. She is benevolent to her Children, and a truly fierce protector when needed. She is greatly beloved by all of our people.”

“Very true,” said Hakan, who had been standing silently at one end of the table. “Queen Leah give us homes, she give us safety. Queen Leah our protector.”

“Thank you, Hakan,” said Emmy. Turning her attention to the leader of the three Portland Night Children, Emmy made her pitch. “As I am certain our representatives have told you, we offer protection, safety, and comfort.” She indicated the food on the table. “Those in our shadow eat well. They do not need to steal for their table. Look at how healthy they are,” she said, waving in the direction of the two standing behind us. “We offer a better life.”

“What would you require of us, for this?”

“You must abandon the night. You must live as the daylighters do. As you have seen, we do not hide our nature. Look at Michael here,” Emmy said, indicating for him to come forward. “It has been a year since we gave him a good, safe home of his own. It has been a year since he has hidden, a year since he disguised his nature. His little daughter goes to school, yes, a daylighter school. She has friends among the daylighter children. Friends who invite her into their homes, friends whom she and Michael welcome into their home, as well. For Michael, to step into the daylight was difficult at first, but now, he has a life he could never have dreamed of for himself and his daughter.”

Michael spoke up at this. “My daughter laughs more now than she ever did when we lived the old way. My daughter is happy, healthy, and for me, it is most important of all, she has a future of freedom and happiness to look forward to. Accepting the offer of Queen Emmy and Queen Leah’s shadow was the best thing that has ever happened for my daughter.”

“Do any of you have children?” asked Emmy, in a gentle voice. When guy number three nodded, Emmy asked “Have you ever seen the daylighter children play in this park, happy and carefree? Would you like that life for your children?”

Looking at his companions, guy number three said “If this is what you promise I would like to accept. The question remains: what do you require of us?”

“As I said, we would require that you stop hiding. You must clean off the makeup, you must show your true nature-” Emmy began.

“But the daylighters will fear us and kill us!” objected the leader of the three.

Michael bristled at the rudeness of the interruption, but Emmy put a quieting hand on his arm.

“You see me, sitting here before you. I have never worn the makeup, not once in my entire life. Michael and Hakan have not worn the makeup for a year now, and Eddie has not worn it in over six months. All three live amongst the daylighters, never hiding their true skin. All of the Children of our new nation show their skin, and yet none of us have been killed. Yes, there have been a few moments of discord, it is true. These have been very few and far in between.”

Considering the matter settled, Emmy returned to the original question. “We also require that you take jobs among the daylighters. We will help with this, but you must, absolutely must, do the jobs you are given with complete diligence and utmost care. I cannot emphasize this enough. It is absolutely important that the daylighters see your integration with their society as a good thing. Whatever job it is that you are given, you must be the best at it. Whatever the task, you must be the one that the boss relies on to get it done well and quickly. Is this clear?”

Guy number two spoke up at this point. “I don’t understand. Why is this so important to you? Why should we not live as we always have?”

“Because we cannot continue to live as we always have. Our people cannot continue to hide for much longer at all. Daylighters will soon discover us, whether we want them to or not. It is better this way, better for them to come to know us gradually, and comfortably.”

Nodding that this made some sense, the leader of the three asked, “How does this work? If we agree, what must be done?”

“Michael will handle all of the immediate details, but in general, if we,” Emmy said, indicating herself and me, “grant you our shadow, we will find you good, safe and clean homes. We will help you integrate into society, and we will make certain that your needs are met. In return, you will show yourselves. There will be absolutely no makeup. You will do the jobs that are found for you to the best of your ability. If we hear otherwise, we will be greatly displeased.” I took Emmy’s cue and picked the knife off the table and fingered the tip, which had the desired effect of making their eyes bug out as they got the hint.

“There will be other tasks that we may set you, such as reaching out to others of our kind, but those will be infrequent. The better you perform your duties, the more we will reward you,” Emmy explained, indicating Michael’s nicely cut suit. “Now, let us not talk any more of business. I would like for the three of you to take a night to decide. In the meantime, please help yourselves to this fine meal.”

I took another slice of apple and drank a sip of wine to try to help them to feel comfortable doing the same. Soon enough their hunger won out, and the three men polished off the bread and fruit. The wine helped loosen them up a bit, too, and after a little while I managed to get the third guy to tell me about his little son. At that point it was clear that the deal had been made and they would join our new little nation, the first outside our local Bay Area group.