Elegy for a Star

CHAPTER SUMMARY - SPOILERS

Tess sprinted toward the edge of the city, hearing the clash of steel ringing out behind her. How could she have just left Gwendolyn? Joyona and Mairaela wouldn’t hurt her, right? On that note, why were they trying to hurt anyone? All Tess did was cast a spell. All she did was finally be useful. 

She saved them from the spiders, right? Why was that a bad thing? She had no idea about what happened afterward, but she’d been accused of doing something evil. A Dark Wyrden? Only they could cast spells in the Black Sun?

But Tess did it too, and Tess wasn’t evil.

“Will you just let me out now?” Miri sighed in her mind.

Tess ducked behind a corner and whispered under her breath, “If you tell me how you know that thing with the weird eyes.”

Miri was quiet for a time, before replying, “No, but I’m also not going to let you get us killed. Mairaela isn’t fucking around. Didn’t you tell Scirocca you trusted these people?”

“Oh, so you were listening,” Tess breathed silently, looking around the street for a way out. Was that why Scirocca asked her that question? Did she know this was going to happen? There was a bitterness in Tess’ chest about the fact that Scirocca withheld that information from her, though Tess supposed that she did answer with the utmost trust for her allies. She definitely did not see this coming.

There seemed to be a city gate at the end of the road, but she would be exposed the entire way there. If Mairaela got eyes on her, there was no possible way that the archer would miss. Mairaela doesn’t miss.

Tess continued, “And fuck you. How can I trust you when you’re buddies with some weird creature that only exists in the void and calls you his Crow?”

Miri just sighed. Tess could feel the point of Miri’s claw scratching at the little switch in the back of her mind. Goading her. Making her want to scratch back; making her want to release the inner demon.

“How do I even know you’d give control back?” Tess asked again.

This time Miri didn’t respond, and it was then that Tess felt absolutely certain that this wasn’t the route she could take right now.

Tess had other options.

The Horse. The Archer. The Wanderer.

Tess made the signs and threw her hands out, but there was nothing. She took a deep breath and recomposed.

The Keepers. The Horse. The Wanderer.

Again, nothing.

Mairaela’s voice echoed from the street behind her, “Tess!”

Tess inhaled and held her breath, pressing herself up against the wall. She could hear the Fey’s footsteps prowling nearby, stalking her prey. Mairaela had always been the one to see danger approaching, to find their targets, and Tess could recall enough that she knew Fey had better senses than Humans.

The Devil. The Wanderer. The Spinnerets.

Nothing. Tess wanted to scream in frustration.

“Tess, please,” Mairaela spoke softer. Tess could hear her footfalls closeby. She needed to move, but she was paralyzed with fear. “Don’t make this harder for either of us,” Mairaela begged, “You’re just delaying the inevitable. I can’t let you go. Gods, I-... I even believe Gwen when she says you don’t even know what you are, but whether you know it or not, what you are is evil, Tess. It's dangerous. It's dangerous for everyone, and the longer I let you live, the more people you are killing.”

Tess bit her lip. Why wouldn't they just explain? Why wouldn't they let her explain? She knew she was only delaying the inevitable. The moment she moved, Mairaela would know where she was. The moment she ran, Mairaela would put an arrow through her. There was no way she would make it out of the Void, and was a swift death not better than a slow one at the hand of some creature?

“Mairaela, please,” Tess began sobbing, arms hugging herself, clutching her sides, “Please don’t do this.”

In no time, Mairaela rounded the corner on Tess, bow drawn, arrow ready. Her eyes were damp, and Tess believed that this was difficult for her, too. Still, it couldn’t have been more difficult than getting killed, so Tess didn’t feel too bad.

“Please, let’s talk,” Tess begged.

Mairaela shook her head, but still she did not fire.

“Please,” Tess pleaded, “I don’t know what’s-...”

“Stop it, Tess,” Mairaela choked back tears, “Just close your eyes.”

Oh gods, what happened to Gwendolyn? If Mairaela is here, does that mean that Gwen’s dead? She couldn’t hear any more clashes of steel behind her. Was the fight over? Tess wondered if she’d been put down easily. Was it one of the Fey’s arrows, or Joyona’s axe? Or did they spare her?

“What happened to Gwen?” Tess asked, tears streaking down her cheeks.

Mairaela looked like she was trying to well up the determination to go through with it. She elected to reply, “She’s okay. Joyona is restraining her.”

That was a relief, at least. Tess could die knowing that Gwendolyn didn’t also die for her.

“Let me out, Tess,” Miri hissed. There was a battering on the gate of her consciousness.

Tess didn’t respond audibly, but panic welled in her mind. Her cognitive fingertip was sitting on the switch.

Miri was chomping at the bit, “I’m going to rip this bitch in half.”

Tess was shaking, her heart thrumming. Her life or Mairaela’s? She wanted to think she was noble, that she would make the sacrifice, but she was staring death in the face and it was Mairaela that was going to kill her. She took her finger from the switch. She couldn't let Miri kill Mairaela.

“Mairaela,” Tess whispered. This was her final attempt. She knew it. “Mairaela, don’t kill me. You know I’m not a bad person.” Tess’ voice caught in her throat before she managed to choke out, “You know all I wanted to do was-...”

There was a punch in the chest that knocked Tess into the wall. It wasn’t painful, just forceful. She looked down to see an arrow sticking out of her body, directly atop the heart. Panicked breathing took place. She would’ve expected that to hurt, but her body felt numb. It was painless, like Mairaela said. She could feel the warmth of Mairaela’s soul embracing her, protecting her from a painful end. But it was still an end. Tess was sobbing as her body slumped down against the wall. She couldn’t feel her legs anymore.

She looked up to see Mairaela looking down at her. The Fey dropped her bow, hands shaking. Tears ran down her cheeks and her voice wavered as she cried, “I’m sorry, Tess. I’m so, so sorry. I wish I had a different choice.”

Me too, Tess thought. It wasn’t that she pitied Mairaela for having to go through with this; having to kill her friend. They didn’t know one another for long. Mairaela would likely feel sad for some time, but she would move on, with nothing but the occasional frown when she recalled the would-be novice she’d been forced to kill during her Void exercise. Maybe there would be rumors that were passed around about what a coldhearted soldier Mairaela was. For a second, Tess almost felt happy for her. Instead, she was afraid for Mairaela.

I’m sorry too, Tess thought once she could taste blood in her mouth. She pressed her mental finger against that switch in the back of her mind.

“It’s about fucking time,” Miri said with a rumbling growl.

Tess flipped the switch.