NOVEL FROG 64 - Critical Reception
The bigger they are, the harder they fell. That’s what they say, anyway. The problem for me was that my ego had gotten pretty big. I was under no illusion that my time was coming, and indeed there had been some close calls. You would think I’d be more humble after being nearly bested by gravity, or a horse, or even hubris. The trouble was, I had gotten away with it. Time healed all wounds, as if the System was keen on showing all the different types of injury I could amass yet still hold myself together in one piece.
Jokkar chuckled, a deep rumbling thing that did little to improve my own mood. “My stun usually makes it easy to smash people into paste. I’ll have to kill you normally, before your friends wake up.”
He was in thick plated armor, and even the joints look like they were padded with something difficult to pierce. Other than the shadowed circle areas where his eyes were, and thin vertical slits where his mouth would be, he was totally covered in metal. Not great for me. Yet, before I knew it, my feet were taking me toward him. Self preservation was out of the window. I wanted to keep his focus away from the others even at the cost of my own mortality. All eyes on me. I was the showman, after all.
I slid across the cobbled road as his mace swung over my head, the gust of displaced air taking my hat off. A pair of cards scraped across his arm, but did very little. As he went for a backhand follow-up, I threw a conjured bag at him. A blue shield flared around him as he jumped back. The bag fell to the floor, and an onion rolled out from the opening. Testing the waters, seeing what he was made of.
As his helmet turned back to me, my crossbow bolt was already in the air, denting the metal just to the side of his right eye. His arm went up and blocked the second. While he was distracted, I ran around him. He had strength, but his movement speed was terrible. I rolled past his leg and he shoved the end of his mace downward, cracking the stone road. Another card went out and scratched around the side of his helmet, doing little more than removing some of the paint to show brighter silver. The ground around him burst with a shockwave and I stumbled backward.
He swung in a wide arc and I jumped atop a chair and into the air over it, my beloved furniture piece shattered in the process. As I dropped back down, a cloth went over me. I rolled forward as he swiped at it, catching the head of the spear that I used to prop up the fabric in lieu of it being my head. Dazzle icons were doubling up at an impressive rate, my tricks mostly for survival at this stage, but working all the same.
His mace came around in another wild swing as his boot stomped toward me.
It collided with me, and for a brief moment, I felt dead. The warmth of the Healing Charm broke at the same time as most of my bones, and the worst of it snapped back into place right after. My body slunk from the raised stone onto the ground. Still exhausted from the trauma of it, my body struggled to function against the draw of having a peaceful nap.
“Nice try,” he growled at me as he looked down and saw the rope tied around one leg, now visible. I hadn't the time to do anything more with it before the invisibility wore off. “For taking my eye, you can watch me kill your Party first.”
He turned away and started walking towards Ren, mace slung up onto his shoulder.
“No,” I seethed, pain wracking my body.
His plated feet stopped, and he looked over his shoulder. “So stubborn. Do you not know when you have lost?”
“It ends, when I say… that the show is over.” I wavered as I stood to my feet. My eyes felt as though they were on fire. Beneath my cape my left hand worked through a Bandage. Just a few more seconds of inaction, please.
“Oh, a show is what you want?” He turned back to the prone elf and raised his mace into the air.
A blur of a dark shape brushed in front of his helmet, and then I was in the air in front of him, switched with the hell-bird. From my hand, I threw a handful of nails into his face. As I hit the ground, pain flaring up my tired legs, I held out my hands and cast Arc+ from the Spell Scroll. Lightning pulsed from my hands, sharp yellow electricity arcing across from his body to the conductive nails and back to him again. He staggered back, clutching at his face and convulsing.
“Bastard, y-you’ll pay for this.” He dropped his mace to the road and held his head as he absorbed the last of the magical damage. As he went to pick the weapon back up, it vanished into my Inventory.
“Looks like that’s mine now.” I grinned from beside him, the glow of my purple eyes reflecting off of his armor.
He turned and punched me, Card Fan+ causing me to slide across the rain-slick road, my back slamming up against the embankment. I coughed up a little blood as he ran toward me, anger blazing in his one good eye. I grinned and crossed my arms. A blanket suddenly hung over me as he launched his next punch, striking something that burst out bright red across the muddy embankment. I had left the can of red paint in the way as I dropped and rolled forward between his legs.
As he tried to turn, he got caught on a couple of chairs that I had ejected from my Inventory to get in the way. Too heavy to fall over such small obstacles, he crushed his way through them. When he gained his footing, I was juggling three blood vials again. There was a tune playing in the back of my head. Pleasant. Complimentary. Soothing.
“That won’t work on me, mewling shit. I get that stuff by the jug load.”
“Huh? No, this is just to distract you.”
He glared to the side just too late as a fireball from my Imp+ struck him on the side of the head. The red paint cracked and flaked away from the armor as he winced away. From near the woods, the Imp+ was starting up a second attack already. There was no way he could go out there to kill the demon while still trying to kill me, I had thrown that card as far as I could while he was busy punching dirt.
“Tell me the Lady’s plans and I won’t kill you.” I spoke calmly, despite the energy pulsing through me. Vials away, my hands hung low.
“You’re not getting a word out of me, shitstain. She’ll be sitting in the palace long before I’m done torturing you. My regeneration will heal these wounds once I get more blood, no problem.”
That was enough for me. Minimum threshold for everything reached.
“Any last words?” Any humor was gone from my face. I felt cold now, almost wanted to shiver. Needed to keep him busy. Blood ran from my nose. I wavered as I became lightheaded, eyes burning as if they might bleed too. It all needed to escape, I had pushed too hard. Sometimes you had to give the show your all, and then some.
“Fuck your tricks.”
Amusing, in its own way. I probably couldn’t have thought of anything more poignant if I was in the same situation, really. The cobbled road was littered with small indents of all the times during the fight where I had attempted to get this one specific card… and as fresh blood ran from the rest of my suffered wounds, I wondered if it would be enough. Well, I wouldn't have to worry for much longer if it wasn't.
He launched himself toward me, and from underneath my cape, I withdrew the card.
Not purple, and not even white. Bright red, crackling with energy. The fabled critical card that the System promised me. Had taken a lot of attempts during the fight to get it, but as soon as it bloomed into my hand, I knew it. Could feel the difference immediately. It was beautiful, in a way, to my tired mind that was so bored with blood and flame. Something radiant yet hellish at the same time, perfect for my demonic side. Even time seemed to slow as I performed my final trick.
One last calm breath and then the card was out, a trail of bright crimson illuminating the path as it cut through the air. Turned it vertically, then at a slight slant, even as blood dripped from both my hands. So much practice in using my cards, all for a moment like this. I exhaled as I made the last adjustment before… oh, yes.
Amongst the gloom and light rain of the battlefield, show light illuminated me. The sounds of applause and cheers overrode the burning fort, filling my ears with something so comforting and familiar despite this new world. Small fireworks blossomed with color into the air above me. Reds, greens and blue. I was almost sure some bouquets were thrown at my feet. A risk to let the card go uncontrolled as I cast the show-stopping spell. But now he couldn't move. Frozen in place by the greatest and last performance he'd ever see.
I threaded the needle. Despite all the odds and the risk taken by the man who never gambled, the card passed through one of the thin mouth-slits in the helmet. Red light briefly illuminated the insides of the metal before flesh and bone burst out of the eye-holes.
Blood sprayed across me as his body stumbled to the ground, right before a second fireball hit him, warming me. The perfect execution, in more ways than one.
"How's that for 'Max Stun'... fucker?" I slurred as my tongue and brain hadn't quite gotten back on the same page yet.
As his life and Dazzle icons faded away, so too did the elated glow of appreciation. I popped the cork of the second Rejuvenation potion and stumbled over to the prone elf.
Her eyes flickered open slowly as I kneeled beside her. With my bloodied hand, I pushed the hair from her face. “Sorry,” I murmured, painting streaks of my own red across her cheek, “that made it worse.”
“Max?” Her brow furrowed, and she struggled to push herself up. “Shit! Ow. Think I dislocated my leg. You okay?” Panic flashed across her face as she tried to read me before looking at the dead-Jokkar situation behind me. “You did it?”
I handed her a Health Potion and sat beside her to prop her up. “I guess. To all three questions.” I didn’t feel the elation of success. Even the finale showering me with brief adoration hadn’t brought me the dopamine it used to. The bear yawned and began to come to, as well.
She took the potion with a grimace and grunted as her leg popped back into place with a loud click. Wolf got up to his feet shakily, noticed us and padded over, still light-headed and dazed.
“Sorry," he grunted, "I think I napped through the battle.”
“You’re good, bud.” Warmth flooded me as Ren healed me, before she cast a second one onto the bear.
He sat beside us and we watched the fort aflame. A section collapsed, sending embers up into the sky. They faded as they cooled in the air, dropping again as soot and ash. The largest campfire I could imagine, I was enthralled.
Ren leaned her head against me. “You look like shit. Was it a tough fight?”
“Nah,” I lied. “I’ve fought tougher horses.”
She exhaled through her nose. “I suppose he wasn’t the talkative type?”
I looked over at the bear, who was just idly licking around his maw as he stared off at the burning building. He didn't seem too much worse for wear, probably the toughest out of all of us. Despite how things turned out, I wasn't sure whether I was the lucky one not taking the full stun length when these two did. It would have been the Oathwarden ability that kept me up, my shield only stopped damage. No use worrying about the what-ifs. Instead, I rested my aching head against the blonde hair of the elf.
“He might have just been posturing, but he mentioned something about the Lady taking the palace.” Lofty ideals - it seemed clear she wasn't getting her levels the traditional way.
“There’s a palace?” Ren sat up away from me. “Oh, where’s my hat?”
I pointed over to a muddy area near the woods where it had gotten caught on a branch. “Here.” From my aching hand, a Hellhound+ went out, and the large canine grabbed the hat softly between its mouth and brought it back. Ren gave the demonic dog a hug in thanks, and I let him hang about with us until his time was up.
We took the time to heal up properly, but barely moved. There was something about the large building slowly burning away and collapsing in parts that captured our full attention. Possessed us, almost. The whole left side went down, having sustained the greatest amount of fire damage alongside Wolf and Jokkar breaking most of the lower floor structure. There wasn't much to say, really. I was tired and had endured enough hardship for one day. It was nice just to see what we had accomplished. Somehow defeating greater odds, because why? We were stronger? Smarter? Luckier?
Eventually, I sighed. “We should head back to town.” It seemed obvious, but we had been sitting out in the light rain for a good twenty minutes. Rushing headlong into the next area in our state was just asking to get knocked into the river by a trap - or we’d find there’s another fort on the other side. Or worse.
Some rest and relaxation allowed our enemy to get a couple of steps ahead, but better than us putting more feet in an early grave. Then we wouldn’t be able to help or save anyone. Not that I felt like a hero at present.
“Alright,” she agreed, as I helped her to her feet. “Let’s go.”
Despite the journey along the road being arduous enough on the way to the fort, it was even worse on the return. Drab showings of the corpses on display were not facing toward us, but moving past the blank sides didn’t make it feel any more like a victory parade.
Even the rain picked up as the breeze pushed in our faces to harry our return. We hobbled and winced. I helped Ren walk some of the way, Wolf helped us both when we needed to stop and rest. It had taken a lot out of us. Even with all the healing we had, our bodies were just aching and sore. If the System had something hidden away that dealt with all the minor traumas, I’d be spending half my gold on stocking up. Not injured, just worn down.
Entering the town once more, it felt the same as usual. As if our actions hadn’t even moved the needle. While it was nice to think there would be handshakes and celebrations for the adventurers who thwarted evil, the System-created didn’t know and didn’t care. We had fixed the area for future Players, maybe, but there was no fame and fortune granted to us for our self-imposed heroics.
The barkeep didn’t pay too much notice of how bloodied and beaten we looked. Gave us the key for our usual room. Nobody else in the tavern, save for the mindless patrons that Wolf nudged out of the way a little more forcefully than usual.
Ascending the stairs felt like agony, and as Ren locked the door, I sunk to the floor, my back against the side of the bed.
“Flip for the first bath?” I asked, a tired smile across my face.
She rolled her eyes. “Sure, go for it.”
A coin in my hand, I flipped it in the air for her to call it.
“Heads.”
Caught it, flipped it onto the back of my hand. I slid my hand back to reveal two coins, one heads and one tails.
"Smooth, trickster." She smiled and shook her head in exasperation, before gesturing for me to follow her to the bathroom.
After all, what good was being the best showman around, without an audience willing to suspend their disbelief?