Bi The Way

Rodney's fists clenched at his sides as Hunter continued to talk down about Ally, the small group turning on his former best friend. Rodney didn't want to hear anymore, so he slowly entered the room. The pounding music and chatter from the party outside the room were a distant hum as Rodney felt his head start to throb.

"Enough," Rodney muttered under his breath, shoving his way to the front of the group where Hunter was delivering his speech.

"What the hell dude, you made me spill my drink," someone called out, the group fell silent as their attention fell on the scene.

"I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to," Rodney picked up the red solo cup from the floor, while the girl looked down at the stain on her dress.

Hunter's eyebrows raised as he watched Rodney hand the drink back. "I think there are some towels in the bathroom we can use to get that out. Rodney, why don't you join me?" He led the way out of the room, strolling to the bathroom with the purpose.

Once inside the marble-accented room, Rodney wasted no time. "What was all the stuff you were saying about Ally?" he asked, the words tumbling out as he watched Hunter pull some towels out of the closet.

Hunter turned back to look at him, feigning confusion. "That stuff was the truth. I've heard all about what she did to you,"

"How did you hear about that?" Rodney cut him off, feeling very exposed. He hadn't told Hunter about it, after all, Hunter confused him and he was never really sure what he wanted.

"Jordan told me about it." Hunter tapped the side of his nose with a smirk. "I just noticed you've been off so I asked them."

Rodney's skin prickled with unease. "Hunter please don't ruin Ally's life because of me. I am so tired of everybody claiming they are trying to help me by hurting her. I want everyone to stop assuming they know what I want."

Without waiting for a reply, Rodney spun on his heel and left, the door slamming behind him as he decided he was done with this party.

He stormed through the party, eyes straight ahead, ignoring the curious glances his abrupt exit earned. He needed space, a moment to breathe without feeling like he was being analyzed.

"Rodney?" Jordan's voice carried over the music as they tried to wave him over. "Come join us,"

"Sorry I need some air," Rodney said, not wanting to talk to them. "Going for a walk."

"Want company?" Jordan offered, noticing Rodney looked off.

"Stay with Samantha," Rodney replied, his pace quickening. "I'll be fine alone."

Jordan nodded, stepping aside as Rodney pushed through the front door and into the cool embrace of the evening.

The long driveway stretched out before him, and the perfectly manicured lawn rustled in the breeze. As he walked toward the street he heard the doors swing open and the sound of footsteps begin to follow. Rodney turned, expecting to find Jordan, but instead found Hunter, chest heaving slightly from the chase.

"Look, I'm sorry," Hunter panted, looking up at him with a sincerity that Rodney didn't know he was capable of. "I should have minded my own business. I get why you're pissed."

Rodney crossed his arms. "Yeah, I am. But I am mostly tired, it's hard to move on when everyone keeps bringing her up."

"Point taken." Hunter held up his hands in surrender. "I promise I won't say another word about Ally. Your business is your business."

Rodney exhaled, the tightness in his chest easing ever so slightly. "Thanks," he managed to say with the smallest smile.

"Can you forgive me?" Hunter's voice was low, his breath forming clouds in the chilly air. "You know I care about you, Rodney. I have all these weird feelings when I am around you. Sometimes I just.. you know?"

Rodney knew exactly what Hunter was talking about. "Yeah, I get it." He kicked at a pebble, sending it skittering into the darkness. "I feel the same way. But I'm just so confused right now. I did everything to make the cottage trip special and she still left me."

Hunter's arm found its way around Rodney's slumped shoulders, making them both blush a little. "I'm sorry, I've made this about me. I should be focused on what you need right now,"

"What I need right now?" Rodney murmured, looking up into the night sky. "I need closure. I just..." His voice cracked as he felt tears beginning well. "I need to face her, tell her how much she's hurt me. She's out there living her life like nothing happened, and I'm..."

"Stuck," Hunter finished for him.

"Exactly," Rodney huffed, feeling a little bit of the weight he had been carrying lifted with his confession. He finally had a clear idea of what he needed to do; he needed to confront Ally.

"I get it, you helped me when I was stuck. If you need anything, I'm happy to help," Hunter said earnestly, and Rodney placed his head on Hunter's shoulder.

"Thanks, Hunter," Rodney murmured, and on impulse, he leaned in and gave Hunter a quick peck on the cheek. "I think I better head home, I know what I need to do now."

"Uh yeah, I'll see you at school Monday," Hunter blushed, a half-smile playing on his lips as Rodney got up, he pulled out his phone and shot his mom a quick text.

As he walked to the street, Rodney's mind raced, trying to figure out how to approach Ally. He would let her know exactly how she made him feel, and how hurt he was, and she would finally explain why she did it. The thought of her realizing the hurt she caused, possibly begging for forgiveness, made him feel a strange sense of happiness. He knew if she did apologize, he wouldn't accept it.

---

Rodney hadn't really slept that night, he still didn't know how he could talk to Ally. He scrolled through her Instagram until he found a post about her play. Rodney's lips curled into a smile as he read about the white king getting cast in another show. Auditions to replace the role were that night. Perfect.

"Looks like I need to find a monologue," he whispered as he got out of bed, a plan taking form. He opened his laptop and began to scroll from something he could use to get into the audition.

That night, the stage lights dimmed as one of the hopeful actors left the stage, leaving a trail of nervous energy in his wake. Ally sat among the cast, reading over her lines with her script folded in half, silently wishing for the auditions to end. The director, an animated woman with bright red hair, shuffled through her notes before calling out the next name.

"Rodney Thompson."

Ally's breath hitched, her eyes were immediately drawn to the stage. She watched, wide-eyed, as Rodney strode onto the stage, his shadow stretching ominously across the wooden floorboards. His eyes met hers with a glare, pinning her to her seat. This was a scene out of her worst nightmare, she didn't want to be anywhere near Rodney. She knew what she had done was wrong but she had hoped she wouldn't have to actually face him.

"Thank you, I will be performing a monologue from Hamlet," Rodney began, taking his place centre stage, "O, what a rogue and peasant slave am I!." He began his performance, it was far more convincing than the others who had gone before him, and that made Ally even more nervous.

As he concluded, Ally watched the director closely and prayed that she hated it. The director leaned over to her assistant, her whisper barely audible over the collective murmur from the rest of the cast, "He's got something raw... something real."

Ally's heart stopped, she knew what that meant. Rodney would be joining the show.

"Thank you, everyone. If I could have everyone back on stage please," the director announced, her eyes lingering on Rodney as the other actors filed back onto the stage.

"You've all been wonderful, however, we only have one role to fill this evening. Our choice for the role is Rodney Thompson, thank you, everyone, for coming out tonight."

Ally felt sick, and her world began to spin. She watched Rodney nod, a small, satisfied smile playing on his lips as he made his way over to the director.

"Thank you so much for this opportunity," he said to the director before taking a seat beside Ally, who was doing her best to become invisible.

"Been a while," Rodney murmured, not bothering to look over at her.

"Yeah," Ally replied curtly, her gaze fixed on the empty stage.

The director decided to do a read-through with Rodney there, and Ally moved through her scenes mechanically, acutely aware of his presence. It was like being followed by a storm cloud and she was waiting for the lightning to strike. She made sure she sat far enough away from him to avoid any conversation.

Finally, as rehearsal ended and the theatre emptied, Rodney found her waiting for her ride.

"Ally, need to know why," he said, his voice tinged with anger and confusion.

"I..." Ally hesitated, feeling the weight of his stare. "I can't do this right now." She turned away from him.

"It's unfair, you know? I don't even know what I did to make you hate me," he pressed, stepping closer.

"Rodney, I don't want to talk to you about—" Ally started, then stopped, knowing he wouldn't let it go until he got his answer. "Because I don't know who you are anymore. And I feel like you've been keeping things from me for the past two years. And you were acting so weird, just needed space,"

"So you just choose to leave without saying anything? And you think I'm the weird one?" Rodney's voice cracked.

"Look, can we not do this here," Ally pleaded, her eyes darting to the exit.

"No Ally, why don't you just keep telling me how untrustworthy I am," Rodney said, a cold edge to his tone, making Ally even more uncomfortable.

"Ok, maybe those were the wrong words to use," Ally took a few steps back from him, feeling his anger radiating off of him. "But you're not you, I don't know who you are anymore," She scanned the parking lot, hoping to see her mom's headlights turn into it.

"Ally, I'm not the one who's changed, you are," He paused, searching for the words, "You just use people to make yourself feel good and then dump them the minute they aren't exactly what you want,"

Ally's face paled, her eyes wide and unblinking as she looked up at him. She seemed frozen, unsure of how to respond.

"You dumped Matt and haven't talked to him since," Rodney continued, the words spilling out faster now, heated and reckless. "You ignored my existence for most of grade nine because I wasn't what you wanted me to be. Did you ever think about how that made me feel?"

"Please, just stop—" Ally tried to interject, but Rodney was already barreling on.

"And your Christmas party? You didn't even want me there. I had to track down your mom and trick her into inviting me." Rodney didn't even seem to notice the weight of his confession but Ally's eyes widened.

"You tricked my mom?" Ally's shock was evident but Rodney was in a rage-fueled spiral at this point.

"Then there's the charity I started just to impress you, remember? You wouldn't even help out with it because Matt was more important than your apparent best friend. I had make up a fake relationship just so you would hang out with me." Rodney's hands were shaking, his anger mingling with his hurt. "And when we dated—"

"Rodney, you need to stop now!" Ally cut in, her voice cracking. But Rodney couldn't stop, not now.

"No matter what I did you found an excuse to pull away from me," he accused, his throat tightening. "You dumped the whole cottage planning on me. You went around doing whatever you wanted, and I had to deal with all the planning on my own." His breath hitched; raw pain etched into every word. "And you know what? I can't believe I felt guilty kissing Hunter because he—at least—seemed to actually like me!"

The silence that followed was suffocating. Rodney's heart pounded, as he began to come down from his tantrum. He began to realize just how much he had told her. The air felt charged with his admission, and he watched as realization dawned in Ally's eyes.

"You kissed... Hunter? While we were together?" Ally whispered, her voice barely audible. She was still dissecting the rant in her head—she was right, Rodney had been keeping things from her and that one fact was all she needed.

Rodney's eyes widened in horror at his own words. "I... did I say that—" He tried to recover, a sinking feeling began to develop in his gut. He didn't know how to come back from this.

"So you did lie to me, and you tried to manipulate me..." Ally's voice was distant, her expression unreadable. Rodney remained frozen in place, unable to move even though every fibre of his being was screaming at him to get out of there.

"Ally, I—" He tried, but he had nothing. The damage was done, and he was the one that looked like a monster. With a choked sob, he turned and fled from the theatre parking lot, the echo of his footsteps faded into the night.

Ally remained still for a moment longer, watching his retreat. Then, slowly, a strange sense of relief washed over her. She straightened up, a small, sad smile touching her lips. It wasn't just her being paranoid; something had been wrong, and now she knew what.

"I can go back, none of it was my fault," she murmured to herself as her mom finally pulled into the lot. Rodney was the one who should be hiding she told herself, choosing to go back to SDCI. She was going to be back with her friends, and she was going to tell them everything.

Meanwhile, Rodney raced through the dark streets, his mind a blur of panic and self-hate. What would Ally do with what he'd said? He couldn't bear the thought of everyone knowing, judging, and hating him for what he did. And what about Hunter? What if their kiss came out? Then everyone would call him gay, even though he liked girls too.

He hurried into his room, locked the door behind him, and sank to the floor. His phone sat on the bed and he thought about texting Marcy or Derek but he knew they would hate him for it. He had ruined everything, he had to find a way out before Ally shared it with the world.