Apocalypse Parenting

There was a pretty intense burst of laser communication toward the Clothes-Lovers’ planet today from the Maffiyir flagship. Encrypted, of course, so we don’t know the contents of the message, but it was 3.8 times longer than their usual transmissions.

--Radio transmission from Voices for Non-Citizens

“What?! Mom, you’re joking at me!” Gavin said. “Stop teasing!”

Micah’s reaction was more subdued but equally skeptical. “How can you and Cassie both get Specialties and not be able to show us anything? I knew you wouldn’t make explosions or lightning or anything cool like that, but still.”

I frowned. It was hard to argue with him when I secretly agreed, but I gave it my best effort. “What I got should be useful. I might be the only person in the world who can make an Announcement over a large area and use Analyze effectively to monitor the response to my Announcement.”

“Wow, great,” Micah said. “What a superpower. Now you don’t have to talk to the person next to you and ask them to do the Announcement.”

“Cut the sarcasm, kid. It’s not like I got to choose my Specialty.”

Pointy cut in before Micah could respond. “Your mother’s example may not have been the best, but there will be significant utility to her ability even if there isn’t hidden functionality… which I suspect there is. Announcement and Analyze aren’t directly combat-related, but she has several combative abilities which would otherwise not be able to be empowered in tandem. She’ll have a strong Paralyze, Telekinesis, Assisted Strike, Parry, Draw Attention, and Basic Hologram. Pair that with her sensory, analytical, and communicative capabilities, all of which will also be empowered? She’ll be an unparalleled master at battlefield control.”

Micah didn’t look impressed, but stopped arguing, just shrugging.

“And Cassie can’t show us anything cool either?” Gavin persisted.

Eyes on the prize, I thought wryly. That’s my middle kid.

Pointy hesitated. “We just got home, so we’ve had little opportunity to practice… but I do believe that Cassie and I will be able to show you things that are, as you say, cool. Give us until tomorrow evening?”

Gavin pulled at his face, mashing it into an ugly shape as he threw himself back on our mattress. “Okaaaaaay.”

“None of that, now! Get your PJs on. I don’t want your dirty combat clothes messing the bed!”

Gavin made a face at me as I reached out a hand to pull him to his feet, but complied, letting me chivvy him and his siblings through their modified bedtime routine. He and Cassie fell asleep quickly, but it took more than an hour before I finally prodded Micah into closing his eyes… only to have them snap back open in alarm as an Announcement blasted into our minds.

Alert. Alert. Arsenal has sighted a new monster. Please stand by for details.

Cassie woke up and started crying, her small arms clutching my neck with airway-blocking strength. I sighed as I repositioned her hands, grateful that I’d talked the Arsenal into keeping me at Cassie’s power level.

Was it really necessary to do an Announcement? It’s awfully late! It was hard not to feel irritated as I watched my kids snap out of the sleep I’d so painstakingly herded them into. I guess not everyone is in their beds, and they probably don’t have an exact list of who’s out and farming points.

I was about to coax Cassie into laying back down when I realized something. Ugh, this is a waste, isn't it? There will probably be more announcements for the next hour or so at least. Damn.

“Come on kids,” I said. “It’s going to be hard to get back to sleep. Let’s head to the Quarry and grab a table while we wait for more information.”

Cassie quieted as I lifted her, but she was still stressed. Her grip on me was vise-like, not budging in the slightest. It was a little funny to realize that I didn’t have to do a thing to “carry” Cassie. My daughter likely found having my hand on her back comforting, but she didn’t need the physical support. I felt a sudden kinship with the monkey mothers in nature documentaries, their offspring latched on securely even as their parents used their hands to climb trees or swing from vines.

I nodded to Priya and George when I met them in the hall, leading their own pack of unfortunately awakened children.

It didn’t take long for the Quarry to become incredibly crowded, but we were privileged enough to have personal quarters right off the common area, allowing us to snag seats at a picnic table that had been dragged underground.

Our older kids didn’t avail themselves of the seats, instead running off to play, excited by the late-night disruption. Cassie remained attached to my side like a barnacle, while Arnav had already fallen back asleep in George’s arms. Pointy, squeezed in between Cassie’s head and my shoulder, was silent, frozen by the touch of negative-Novelty me. I thought about trying to get my daughter to set her on the table-top, but decided against it. Cassie was too stressed right now, and pressuring her would make her resist the idea. Better to wait until she was a little calmer and see if she’d either set the stuffy down or climb off my lap.

“I hope we can get back to sleep soon,” I said.

Priya nodded, her eyes following our older kids as they took place in a super-powered game of tag. “Yeah. If Pointy can create white noise, it might be worth letting the kids have a sleepover. Maybe they’ll sleep in tomorrow morning.”

George laughed. “No way! They’d be too excited and keep each other awake way too long tonight. It’ll erase any benefit.”

Priya sighed. “You’re probably right. I hope new monsters won’t always appear after dusk.”

I shook my head. “I doubt it? That would be a new kind of predictability, and if they’re appearing at the same time worldwide, it’s always going to be midnight for someone.”

Priya blinked. “I can’t believe I hadn’t thought of that! Some poor people have been dealing with new monsters appearing while they slept this whole time.”

“Yeah,” I said. “Probably. I talked to Pointy about it once, and supposedly the very worst times would have been for islands in the middle of the Pacific… but Australia and the eastern parts of Asia have had it nasty. I think she said eastern China was midnight? So I guess this is a nice change of pace for them…”

We continued to chat quietly, interrupted by sporadic Announcements.

New monster measures approximately two feet in length. Dark in color. Amorphous but largely sluglike in appearance.

New monster does not appear aggressive and flees when spotted or approached. Behavior is stealthy, and amorphous nature is inhibiting capture attempts.

Monster can fit through openings ½ inch tall.

I shuddered at that last one. “How big are the vents down here?”

“It varies,” George said. “About a foot across and six inches tall? Way more than half an inch.”

Priya cleared her throat. “We know they fit through half-inch openings. We don’t actually know how small the openings have to be to block them. If they can be blocked...”

The look on my face made Priya wince. “Sorry!”

I shrugged, still holding Cassie. “No, you make a good point. I don’t like the point, but it’s a good one.”

New monster is fanged and will attack if cornered.

New monster possesses strong paralytic venom.

Diameter of fangs Analyzed at ⅓ of an inch. Recommending all openings larger than ¼ inch be considered permeable to these monsters.

Confirmed monster does not appear to be able to pass through openings ¼ inch across.

Monster will approach and attack stationary or unconscious targets.

After target is paralyzed, monster will slowly begin eating. Rescue may be possible! Please check on your neighbors!

New monster designated “paraslug.”

The Turners and I exchanged uncomfortable looks.

“So… About that sleepover idea…” I said.

“Yes please,” Priya said. “On a permanent basis?”

I nodded slowly. “It’s only a matter of time before the Arsenal recommends communal sleeping arrangements. If Pointy was fully functional, she could watch over us while we slept, but I don’t want to trust that until our Novelty is out of the negatives. She should be aware if a monster is in the room, but if it’s going for someone she can’t see…”

George shuddered. “Not worth the risk. What about Cassie’s new stuff? Her, uh… combat cat?”

I frowned. “She dismissed her Combat Companion when we were done fighting for the day, since it was injured. I figured I’d have her summon a new one in the morning, but that was probably a little overconfident of me. Cassie, can you bring Bigkitty back?”

Cassie twitched, and the dog-sized feline fuzzed into existence next to us, sitting attentively with its tail wrapped around its paws.

“Thanks, Cass,” I said softly. “Tell Bigkitty to guard us all while we sleep, please?”

There was a muffled acknowledgement from where Cassie’s face was still pressed against Pointy.

George relaxed slightly. “Well… I think at least one of us still needs to stay awake as a safeguard, but that should help.”

“Definitely can’t hurt,” I agreed.

George peered down at Arnav, who hadn’t woken up for more than a second at any Announcement. “Can I leave him with you? Priya and I can start moving mattresses around. I assume we’ll come to your quarters?”

“Makes sense,” I said. “We’ve got more space. I’ve got a bunch of stacked plastic bins I was using to separate our sleeping area from the entryway. If you guys can move those all into your quarters, there should be enough room to fit your beds.”

George nodded, passing his son across to me, giving me one sleepy toddler per arm. It was a bit awkward, but Arnav’s placid presence seemed to calm Cassie. I could feel her muscles relax as she watched the smaller boy snore peacefully. Soon enough, she had joined him, her grip relaxed enough that it was trivial to use Telekinesis to edge Pointy out of her grip and onto the nearby tabletop. Thus freed, it took only seconds for Pointy to wake up, and I immediately filled her in.

“Hm…” Pointy said. “Odd.”

“What?” I asked. “The timing?”

She shook her head. “No, the choice of monster. I am still building my understanding of Commonwealth culture, but I doubt many races would find these paraslugs particularly entertaining. They do not seem particularly combat-capable.”

“Maybe the suspense of it?” I suggested. “It's not my jam, but suspense horror was a popular genre. People waiting to see if victims are rescued before they die?”

“Maybe…” Pointy said.

“Or maybe the Maffiyir people just want to watch us panic,” I suggested.

“It’s possible…”

“You don’t sound convinced,” I said. “What’s your theory?”

Pointy frowned. “Well, I hope I’m wrong, but… I think this is going to be more lethal than average. Maybe they just want you to die.”